The Blowback
by greengal1996
Summary: This takes place after the season 2 finale. Jeddie-centric with a little subplots in the background. Chapter 35! What will Penny do next? Can Hannah and Janet finally mend fences. Read here and find out!
1. Chapter 1

This story takes place after the season 2 finale. Mostly Jeddie-centric with a little bit of the Knight's Brigade thrown in.

**Chapter 1**

Janet ran crying from the room. As soon as she was out of sight, Eddie couldn't hold back the tears and the rage bubbling to the surface. _How the hell had this happened?_ He had grossly overestimated Janet's character. He never thought she could be capable of such a thing. And to go so far and not stop herself? He had stopped; his love for her had made him stop. His need to be with Janet had made him stop. He knew Rory wasn't for him, and that Janet was. But he had been wrong about that too. He thought he was in love with Janet but how can that be if she did this? Eddie was glad he never told her how he felt. It would have made this all much worse. He would have ended up looking more like a fool than he already was. He laid his head back and pressed the call button on the side of his bed.

"Yes Mr. Latekka, are you alright?"

Eddie quickly wiped the tears from his face before the nurse came into the room, "I'm in pain. Can you give me something, anything? Maybe even something that will make me sleep? Please?"

"I'll have to check with the doctor, but I'll be back as soon as I can. Just hold on. Is there anything else I can get you?"

"No, I just want to be able to stop feeling this way and sleep for a while. If you can help me with that, I'll be fine. Thanks,"

"Be back shortly then." She bustled out of the room and Eddie laid his head back down on the pillow. Just then he heard a beeping noise coming from the computer. Opening up the laptop, he saw Phil's face smiling at him.

"Hey man! You won't believe…." Phil's voice trailed off as he realized something was very wrong with his friend. "Eddie, are you alright? You don't look so good man."

"It's nothing Phys, the meds must be wearing off and I'm feeling a little sick from the pain. That's all." Eddie was proud of himself that he could lie so smoothly.

"Are you sure? Hey, did you work things out with Janet? Did she come by yet since she left after finding out about Rory?"

"Uh..no, she hasn't. I'm sure it will be fine. Don't worry. So, what did you want anyway?"

"Oh, the band is back together and I thought you might want to listen to us jam…" Phil continued to talk and Eddie smiled occasionally, pretending to listen. Once they started performing he even threw in a couple of "dorks" to make it believable. But his mind was on Janet and what she had done to them, to him!

…………………………………………………………..

Janet danced to the music at Hannah and Ray's party. If anyone had asked her what song was playing at that very moment, she wouldn't have been able to tell them. She was a master at hiding her feelings. Her performance was nothing short of Oscar-worthy. She danced and laughed and chatted and joked. No one knew that she was in pain. No one knew what a huge mistake she had just made. But by tomorrow, everyone would know that she had screwed up the best thing that had ever happened to her. She realized this now. There was no way Eddie would take her back after this betrayal. She was angry with Rooster, but in all honesty, knew she didn't have the right to be. Sure what he had done was slimy, but she was the one committed to Eddie, she was the one who had something to lose by crossing that line. And even though she thought Eddie had done the same thing, he was right. She should have asked him, confronted him and then made a decision based on that. Who the hell was she? How had she become this person? What had she become that she would cheat on someone she was in a relationship with? Maybe being with Eddie had just made all her insecurities worse. The anxiety of being with him was just too much for her.. He had been good to her ever since they were officially together and she should have at least given him some benefit of the doubt. Instead she felt sorry for herself and made a life altering mistake. She realized now that she had some real issues to work through and that her insecurities were no excuse for what she had done. She realized all of this now. Too bad it was too late.

……………………………..

Leslie and Robert were dancing the night away enjoying the evening. He took her arms about to twirl her in front of him when his periphery vision caught site of Aubrey and Ronnie. "Oh hell!!"

"Robert! What's wrong? Are you okay?" Calming himself down and trying not to draw attention to Ronnie and Aubrey, he quickly glanced at Leslie and smiled.

"I think I forgot to put the mayo back in the fridge is all." Leslie looked at him a little harder and then glanced in the direction he was looking in previously. She saw Ronnie and Aubrey and what looked like a much-too-comfortable-with each-other gaze.

"Robert, what were they doing when you looked at them? Did they…?"

"They were kissing." He whispered only loud enough for her to hear. "I was so afraid of this. Ronnie wears his heart in his sleeve, but I never thought he would actually act on this. I mean for God's sake, she's his brother's girlfriend?"

"We talked about this. I think his feelings were pretty obvious to everyone involved, including Nick. Aubrey might have been the only one who didn't know."

"What if it makes Nicky leave?" Robert had tears in his eyes. Facing cancer without his oldest by his side just might kill him. He was so hurt when Nick almost left. And when Nick decided to stay, the relief he felt was beyond description.

"I don't think you have to worry about that Robert. Sure he will be angry with Ronnie, but I think it will work out for the best. Besides, we all know it's always been about Hannah."

Robert took Leslie in his arms again as a slow ballad started playing. "I hope you're right honey. I hope you're right."

She looked up from his embrace and laughed, "Have I EVER been wrong?"

…………………………………………………..

The next day, Eddie gets a visit in his hospital room from a police officer. He asks him if he wants to press charges. Eddie says in no uncertain terms that he does. He is trying to stay cool and not be a hothead. His first inclination was to get well so he could beat the snot out of Matt Lausch, but in reality, he knew that could only land him in trouble too. Better to go by the letter of the law and see where it gets him.

He explained to the officer about his earlier confrontation with Matt. He embarrassingly admitted it was his love for Janet that made him punch Matt in the first place. He even admitted to understanding Matt being sore about it and wanting to take a swing at Eddie down the road. But to go this far? It was unforgivable. The officer listened and took notes, nodding on occasion.

"There might be some trouble for you with that punch you threw at him. But as long as you're willing to go on record to say why you did it, then I think it will carry more weight than his three on one attack." Eddie hesitated at this. Janet never knew the real reason he got into a fight with Matt in the first place. If he told her it would have hurt her badly. Taking a sick pleasure in the possibility of hurting her even just a little bit, he said, "Yeah, I'm willing to go on record."

The officer excused himself, wishing Eddie well and promising to be in touch regarding a possible hearing. Once he left, Eddie tried to get out of bed to walk to the bathroom. He had been holding it for almost four hours now, hoping he could wait until that male nurse Bill was back on duty. Bill being nowhere in site, he decided to try to go by himself. He didn't want the women nurses helping him to the bathroom like some kind of helpless creature. He still had some pride left. Getting out of bed slowly, he walked took a few steps and almost collapsed to the floor. The ribs on his left side were stabbing at him and his head felt light. Before he could even catch his breath, he threw up and lost any pride and dignity he had left. Grabbing the nightstand he reached for the call button and pressed it several times. The pain was all too much and getting unbearable by the minute.

As the nurse came rushing to his side, Eddie groaned in discomfort.

"Come on Mr. Latekka; up you go! You just need to ask for help, as embarrassed as you may be by it."

"Aw Jeez, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about the floor, if there was anyway humanly possible I'd clean it up myself. I'm so sorry…"

"That's' okay…it's okay. Don't worry about it. You know, everything is going to be okay, right?"

Eddie thought about Janet and what had been lost, "I find that so hard to believe right now."

………………………………………………….

"Janet, wake up." Hannah was shaking her friend, surprised that she had celebrated so hard as to pass out from drinking from the party. Hannah had Ray help her take Janet to the guest room for the night. It was already 10 am and Hannah was sure Janet had work today.

"Leave me alone. I want to die." Hannah laughed.

"That's what happens when you have one too many glasses of champagne. You were hitting it pretty hard yesterday. Celebrating that all is good with you and Eddie?"

Janet slowly sat up. It took a few minutes for the room to stop spinning. She looked Hannah straight in the eye and said "I have no reason to celebrate, I did a terrible thing. Eddie was rightly pissed. He broke up with me yesterday."

"Wait, but you said…" Hannah looked so confused, Janet told her everything was great between them.

"I know what I said Hannah, I just didn't want to take away from your special day. So I dealt with it the best I could. Then I started throwing back the drinks to dull the senses, you know? I just couldn't take it anymore. It's over between me and Eddie. I did that. Sure he wasn't an innocent in all this, but what I did crossed a line that is unforgivable. I don't….." Janet started to cry. It was a soul-deep, gut wrenching cry. She was shaking from head to toe and uncontrollably wailing. Hannah held her and wiped her face and soothed her and whispered comforting things in her ear. She told her that she would be okay one day. Janet continued to cry for what seemed like a half an hour until finally she had fallen asleep and Hannah's lap, exhausted from her own grief.

Hannah picked up the phone and dialed Sully's. She had a feeling Janet wouldn't be making it to work today.

………………………………………………………

"What the hell is the matter with these women? Can't they learn to speak the hell up if something is bothering them? Why the hell do they ALWAYS turn to someone else with these LAME –ASS excuses?????? What the HELL WAS SHE THINKING???????? I mean….." Owen continued to rant, pacing Eddie's hospital room waving his arms and venting his frustrations with the situation. Eddie had called the guys, asking them to all come at the same time so he could tell them. Phil was patched in via the laptop with his mouth dropped open in shock. Nicky was sitting in a chair in the corner shaking his head in disbelief and Ikey was very quiet. At that moment, Eddie decided that he was glad he wasn't alone in this. Glad he had friends to support him through this.

"What exactly happened Eddie?" Phil interrupted Owen's diatribe. Ikey was inching towards the door. Owen was getting pretty worked up and he had no desire to end up in the bed next to Eddie.

"Well, she said…" Eddie was cut off by Owen's shouting.

"Where the hell do you think you're going? You want back in? You're going to have to learn to take the heat buddy boy. I may have forgiven you but I haven't forgotten. SIT DOWN IKEY! You can't run from this."

Ikey stopped where he was and looked at Owen with tears in is eyes, "I'm so sorry man. I…it was a horrible…" Ikey blew out a breath and just shook his head. "It was a horrible unforgivable thing. I know that. I'm so sorry and I just didn't want you to be upset anymore so I thought leaving was for the best…"

"I'm mad at the situation, I'm mad for Eddie and hell yeah I'm still mad at you. But you're my brother man. I could no more get rid of you than I could cut off my own leg. Just stay Ikey. I'm calm now." Owen visibly fought for control. "Sorry Eddie, you were saying?"

Eddie proceeded to relay the circumstances; the Rory situation and the fallout from it as far as what Janet did. The guys interrupted every now and then to ask him questions and make a comment, but overall, it just felt good to talk about it, and get it off his chest.

…………………………………………………………

A week later all the guys, sans Phil, met at the hospital at the same time again, but this time it was to bring Eddie home. As if by some unspoken agreement, no one mentioned Janet or what had happened. Despite being so angry at times he wished she'd burn in hell with gasoline clothes on, he couldn't help but wonder how she was doing. Was she as miserable as he was? Why hadn't she tried to contact him again. Of course he would have to turn he away, but it made him more miserable to think that she might be with Rooster now. Eddie held his stomach and groaned. Every time he through about the two of them together he needed an antacid. Rooting around in his jeans pocket he found the small roll of Rolaids and popped two in his mouth, chewing angrily while he stewed in silence. Nicky was pushing his wheelchair (damn hospital policies) and Owen and Ikey flanked him on either side chatting about nothing in particular. Finally, not being able to take it anymore, Eddie broached the subject carefully. Taking his time with his wording, he brought the subject up in a round about way.

"So, what have you goons been up to since I was 'away'?"

"Oh, you know, the usual, hanging out at Sully's or your place, working, drinking beer…" Owen laughed.

"So, I guess everyone pretty much know's about what happened, eh?" Eddie hedged.

"As sure as this is Knight's Ridge my friend." Nicky piped in from behind. Ikey spoke softly, placing his hand on Eddie's shoulder.

"She looks terrible. Like she's lost weight; the bad way. She missed work that first day after you and her broke up and she's been a mess ever since. She is messing up orders at work and people in general are giving her a hard time. If it's any consolation, I think she is almost as much of an outcast as I was. And her and Rooster have nothing to do with each other. They aren't speaking as far as I can tell. Apparently, she was so drunk off her ass that night and he wasn't, that she feels a little taken advantage of. Rooster's words, not hers. She's been taking all of the punishment and hasn't once tried to excuse her behavior or defend it. She's punishing herself far more than you ever could Eddie." Ikey said it all so quick and quietly, the other guys almost missed it. Eddie looked at his friend and nodded once as if to say thank you. Eddie thought he would feel better. Felt like he should feel better, but all he has felt since him and Janet ended was bad.

………………………………………………………..

Janet fumbled with her keys. Her hands were shaking and she couldn't seem to get them in the lock. Successful at last, she opened the door to her empty house and let the tears that she has been holding in all day fall. Putting on lights as she walked through the house, she touched all the things that reminded her of Eddie. The little tray he kept his keys in on the side table in the living room, the beer in the fridge that he favored, the socks that were sitting on the floor next to the hamper that he had neglected to pick up and the bedroom… everything in there reminded her of Eddie. Unfortunately, it reminded her of the worst night of her life with Rooster too. She went to the shower and made quick work of cleaning up. Drying off, she went to "Eddie's" drawer and put on one of his t-shirts. Crying in earnest now, she left her bedroom and closed the door behind her, making her way to the guest room across the hall as had beome her habit this past week. She laid in the bed and fell into a fitful sleep. A week had passed and it still hadn't gotten an easier.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Ronnie rolled over to the sound of his cell phone ringing. Not even coherent, he reached for it in the dark until he located it on the floor of his room beside his bed. Flipping it open in annoyance, he said abruptly, "Hello?"

"Ronnie. I can't believe I'm calling you this late. I know we haven't talked since the party and I'm sorry. I know I kissed you and what scares me is I'm not sorry. I'm sorry it took me almost a week to speak to you…" Aubrey rushed through her thoughts but was interrupted by Ronnie.

"Heeeeey, it's okay. Wait, just hold on, okay?" Ronnie switched on his beside lamp and sat himself up in bed. Glancing at his clock radio he saw that it was 3 am! Groaning for the sleep he would surely lose, he settled into the pillows and picked the phone back up. "I'm here. Tell me what you've been thinking. I'm dying here. But I refuse to be this guy. It's bad enough what we did at the party, but we can't turn into Ikey and Allison or Janet and Rooster for God's sake."

"No, I agree Ronnie. I think it's time I sat down and had a talk with Nick. It's the only way. I just wanted you to know that it's coming. I want to end things with Nick. Maybe once I break it off, we can lay low for a while and then 'casually' fall into dating each other, with his blessing? I don't know what to do Ronnie!"

"No, we won't lie about this. I'm man enough to face this. Besides, I don't want to hide Aubrey. I love you and I want the world to know it."

"Ronnie. I don't that what I feel for you is love yet, but I can see it going that way. Will you be patient with me? I feel like I have this expectation to live up to and quite frankly…"

"There are no expectations Aubs, you being you is all I will ever need."

"Oh. Wow. Okay. I'm going to go now. Sorry it was so late, but I couldn't sleep for knowing how much I was probably hurting you with my silence."

"It's okay Aubrey. I'll talk to you in the morning, okay? Good night."

"Night Ronnie G."

With that, Ronnie rolled over and snuggled into his pillows. Turning the light off, you couldn't see the huge smile that was on his face, but if anyone had walked into his room at that moment, they would have felt the happiness radiating from it.

……………………………………………

She heard he had been released from the hospital today. She wanted so badly to go to him and help him get settled at home. Make sure his bed was made and his sheets were clean. She wanted to make sure he had his favorite ice cream in the freezer and his favorite chips for Monday night football. She wanted to hug him and kiss him, soothe away all his hurts. She wanted to take him to his doctor appointments and run his errands. She wanted many things, and they all had to do with Eddie. But most of all, Janet wanted to take back the mistake she made.

Getting out of bed, she started getting dressed for the day. She would be working the evening shift at Sully's tonight and she assumed since Eddie was home, but still on the mend, she wouldn't have to worry about seeing him. Seeing the guys was the hardest part so far. Owen had been downright hostile towards her and Nick was indifferent. At least Ikey had been kind to her, perhaps because it wasn't so long ago that he was in her situation. She was able to keep her hand on Eddie's pulse through Ikey. He was forthcoming about his health and whereabouts, as if he had hope that they might get back together. Janet had no such hope. She could still remember the rage and hurt on his face when she told him about Rooster. That is not the kind of thing Eddie would forgive. Resigned to it, Janet brushed her hair and went to the kitchen for her morning coffee.

……………………………………….

"That's it buddy, just a few more steps and we're at the couch." Owen was acting like a crutch to Eddie as his side was still painful from the two fractured ribs. He found it hard to breathe, much less walk. By the time he made it to the couch, he had cold sweat all over his forehead and running down his back. The doctor had said he would be recovering for at least a month in the rib department. At least his eye swelling had gone done and he could see better from it.

"Man, I didn't think it would hurt this much. You know if I hadn't already agreed to press charges against Matt, I sure as hell would have after experiencing this!"

"He was taken into custody in front of the entire work crew. It was classic!" Ikey was still laughing from the incident. Matt had never liked Ikey and for Ikey, the feeling was mutual.

"So, uhm, you speak to Janet?" Nicky asked hesitantly.

"Now, why the hell would I do that?" Eddie glared at his friend. Surely he didn't think he would take Janet back after what she had done?

"It's just Eddie, I was thinking about what happened, and you know, your part in all of it. I saw the way you looked at Rory when she walked into the store. I knew it was gonna be trouble. Why didn't you just tell Janet the truth?"

"I DID TELL HER THE TRUTH EVENTUALLY NICKY! SHE JUST DIDN'T GIVE ME THE CHANCE TO." Eddie was half-way out of his seat, before he was reminded that it wasn't a good idea. Letting out what can only be described as a yelp, he sat back down in the chair quicker than he got up.

"Guys, do we really need to do this now? Eddie just got home, and he should be taking it easy. Back off Nicky." Phil looked at Nick with pleading eyes.

"Look, I'm sorry Eddie, I just don't want you to think any of us would think less of you if you forgave her. It was a horrible mistake, but that's what it was. I know she should have asked you first, no one is saying otherwise, but she thought you two were over. Let's not forget what a rookie she is at all this dating stuff." Nick searched his friend's face for a sign of hope. That morning, before Rory had walked in the door, Eddie told Nick that he was in love with Janet. Nick laughed and said he knew, and that everyone seemed to know except him and Janet how they felt about each other. Then Rory walked in the door and everything had changed in that moment. He saw old Eddie, and that was never a good thing.

"I appreciate what you're saying Nicky, but I really don't want to talk about this right now." Eddie looked beaten, physically and emotionally, so Nick backed off.

"Aight! That being done. You want some ice cream Eddie? Some chips? I went out and got your favorites." Ikey broke into the tense silence that was building from Eddie and Nick's little blowup. Janet had called Ikey that morning and told him what to get, in hopes that it would make Eddie more comfortable.

"The ice cream would be nice, thanks Ikey."

When Ikey returned with a pint of Ben and Jerry's 'Cherry Garcia', Eddie cocked his head to one side. The guys didn't know about this. This was a new favorite. A favorite he had developed with Janet. Shifting his eyes up to Ikey's really quickly, he couldn't miss the guilty look that passed over his face. Half-snorting to himself and shaking his head, Eddie took the carton and dug in. So, she had called Ikey, and told him what to get, what would make him happy. A part of him was touched at her thoughtfulness and another part of him was angry at her assumption that a carton of ice cream would make everything better. Disgusted with himself for even touching it, he kept on eating. And why the hell not, that Ben and Jerry, sure knew how to make some ice cream!

………………………………………….

Janet walked into Sully's at 2:50 pm and ran right into Rooster. _Aw hell!_

"Janet!" Janet barely spared him a glance, mumbled sorry and ran to the back to hang up her purse and jacket. Unfortunately, he followed her into the small room Sully had dubbed the locker room.

"Are we ever going to talk about this? I've had some time to think about it and I'm sorry if you feel taken advantage of Janet. I've been… I've been in love with you since we were 12 years old and it just won't go away. I was a lousy friend, but can't you see where I wanted to hope just a little, experience being with you just for a little while, even if it wasn't forever? _Do you _know what it's like being your friend, when what I really want is to be your husband, your lover, the father to your children? I love you Janet, I'm so sorry I hurt you and that this one time, _THIS ONE TIME_, I put myself first instead of you." She looked up at Rooster and saw shame all over his face. She knew the look well because she saw it on her face everyday. Relenting, she reached out and grabbed his hand.

"Rooster, I'm sorry too. I was selfish that night. I knew how you felt, though I didn't suspect it was that deep. I just used you to make myself feel better. I put us in that situation to end up the way we did. It was a bad decision and one I will regret the rest of my life." She saw him wince at the word regret. She put her hand on his shoulder and squeezed a little bit. "I regret it happened the way it did and the reason it happened. If it's at all possible to believe, if things were different, maybe we could have been. But I gave my heart to Eddie a long time ago and I don't want to take it back yet. I'm sorry Rooster, for rejecting you and being responsible for making you feel bad in any way." She was crying now and Rooster took her in his arms and breathed in her scent.

"I'm sorry too Janet. For being a bad friend, for planting all those seeds of doubt in your head, for not truly listening to you that night. I'm sorry we ended up doing something that should have been beautiful and turned out to be a bad memory. I'm so sorry for that. Most of all, I'm sorry for causing you hurt. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Of course Rooster, and I hope you can forgive me?"

"There was never anything to forgive." Rooster lingered holding her one more second then reluctantly, let her go. "So, what are you going to do? How are you going to get Eddie back?"

"Get Eddie back? Rooster that's impossible! You didn't see how angry he was Rooster and so hurt. I hurt him so badly, there is no forgiveness for that, not with Eddie. In fact, if he even gives a little bit of a damn about me anymore, I'd be worried if I were you. He's gonna be none too pleased with you when he gets all better, might even wanna think about visiting your folks for a few weeks."

"Don't worry about me; I'm more worried about you. You really love this guy, don't you? I mean, you're really in love with him?"

"With all I have. I only regret not telling him that. I've told him I care about him a lot, but I've never told him I loved him. I'll live with that regret the rest of my life too." Glancing at the clock on the wall, Janet's shoulders slumped. "Time to face the music. Come on Rooster, at least now I'll feel like I'm not totally alone out there anymore."

Janet and Rooster left the small room and walked into the crowd that was already starting to grow. Janet was so busy the next 8 hours; she hardly had time to think about Eddie or what she had lost. Tonight, there would be time enough after her shift to cry over it, for now, she threw herself into her work, finally having a decent day after so many rotten ones.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Three weeks out of the hospital, Eddie was finally feeling like himself again. After being home a week, he was able to really get around, sleep in his own bed and do light tasks around the house without pain. Two weeks out, he was able to drive his truck without wincing when he turned the steering wheel and go into the office to help Nicky with paperwork. Now, three weeks had passed since he was out of the hospital and he felt useful again. He couldn't pick up heavy boxes, but he could swing a hammer and nail gun. He could caulk and seal, he could help with something that had to do with the business. Ikey, Ronnie and Owen would help out after work with anything they could. They had all really stepped up to help Nick and Eddie out. They all had a vested interest in Best Friend Windows, but Eddie and Nick's names were the ones on the papers. Eddie was grateful for his friends.

Sitting at his desk, looking out the window, he froze when he saw Janet's Jeep drive by Main Street. Hard as it was to believe, he hadn't seen her since he was out and about, no small feat in a place like the Ridge. He got up from his desk quickly and ran to the window. She had parked a little ways up the block and was jogging across the street to the deli. Glancing at his wristwatch, he smiled, knowing that she would be picking up her favorite turkey sandwich for lunch. She looked, beautiful. Her hair was shining in the sun and it appeared to catch the light and shimmer. She had lost a little weight, Ikey had told him that, but not so much. She just looked perfect. What was she wearing? Was that new? Eddie searched his memory banks and couldn't place the shirt or the pants she was wearing. What are those things called? Knickers? Crops? And was she wearing sandals? Angry now, he turned away from the window. Clearly she was doing just fine. New clothes, new attitude, probably be dating soon. She looked happy; prettier than he had ever seen her look. Her hair was flowing down her back like she had let it grow out some and she had a rosy glow about her. Damnnit! He was not going to do this to himself. She ruined everything, and he was not going to go back to a woman he couldn't trust. Despite his inner struggle, he turned just in time to catch her sprinting back across the street, the tell tale turkey sandwich no doubt wrapped in the wax paper from the deli. Eddie smiled in spite of himself, no matter how some things changed; some things always stayed the same.

……………………………………….

Janet sprinted across the street back to her Jeep with her favorite turkey sandwich in her hands. She almost fell on her ass from the ridiculous sandals she was wearing. Hannah and Pizza Girl had come over to her place early Saturday morning to take her on a trip to Boston just for the girls. It really lifted her spirits. They ate in a nice little sidewalk café and drank expensive coffee. They went clothes shopping for spring and summer. Pizza Girl and Hannah argued and fussed over which outfits looked better on Janet, which was more flattering or sexy. They went to Target because it had good prices and the clothes were a good quality. She bought capris pants and sandals, dresses and sexy tops. They shopped for what seemed like hours for clothes, shoes and even lingerie. Janet assured them she wouldn't be needing them, but they insisted a girl couldn't have too much of that kind of thing. Then they surprised her by taking her to a salon that they had made a reservation with. Hannah had prepaid for Janet's hair appointment, full body massage and mani/pedi. Janet was scrubbed, buffed and shining like a new penny by the time she left the place. She was afraid the hairstylist would want to cut her hair, but he had other ideas.

"You have such gorgeous hair! You should continue to grow it out, another few inches even! I want to highlight this color for you, make it really shine. It's a pretty brown right now, but I think I'm going to add a little copper to the mix. Let the sun catch it more. And these curls… so pretty. I'm going to make you _more_ fabulous than you already are!"

By the time Janet walked out of the salon, her hair was so light and bouncy, and the color really was beautiful. It still looked like her, but just brighter, and a little happier. She had not been happy for weeks now and it just wasn't like her to be unhappy. She decided right then and there that her life had changed and Eddie was no longer a part of it. She wouldn't go back to being hermit Janet, sidekick Janet, cheese puff eating alone Janet, she was going to live her life not being afraid or insecure anymore. Even if that meant it would be without Eddie. With a new confidence that she had never really felt before, she walked the streets of Boston with Hannah and Pizza Girl, shedding her inner chubby girl and leaving it in ruins on the streets behind her.

………………………………………….

Eddie was sitting at his desk frustrated as hell. He wanted a closer look at Janet. Damn him for it, but he did. He figured seeing her would get his mad stirred up again. Shake off some of this regret he was starting to feel. It was going to happen eventually, so why not tonight, on his terms, at Sully's. Just then Nick came into the store.

"So, what goes on tonight Nicky? You wanna grab a beer after work or something?"

"Grab a beer? You mean at _Sully's_?" Nick said the last part really slow like Eddie was stupid or something.

"No, at the hardware store! Of course at Sully's, there's no place else to get a beer around here." Eddie hated it that Nick knew him so well at times.

"I'm just saying, I think Janet's working tonight and I'm surprised that you wanna go there, that's all. Don't get all bent out of shape."

"No one's getting bent out of shape!" Eddie snapped. Reigning in his temper, he started again, in a more calm voice. "Look, are you gonna come with me or not Nicky, just be a pal, keep your mouth shut and say yes or no. I don't feel like being psychoanalyzed today."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry man. Of course I'll come with. You want me to call O and Ikey?"

"Why not? sThe more the merrier." Eddie replied sarcastically. Nick groaned inwardly. If he was already in a bad mood at the very thought of seeing Janet tonight, he imagined how much worse it would be once he found out she's doing better and working him out of her system. Nick really didn't want to be there for it, but a friend is a friend is a friend. He opened his cell phone to call Aubrey and tell her that he was cancelling his plans with her. She would understand because Eddie needed him tonight. Sighing he waited for her to answer her phone. When she didn't, he left her a message.

……………………………………………………………

"I don't understand Aubrey. It's been weeks now… heading into a solid month since you told me you were going to end it with Nicky. What's goes on?" Ronnie was getting desperate. He started having that sinking feeling of everything being too good to be true. The day after they talked on the phone, Aubrey hadn't broken up with Nick. Nor the next day after that, nor the week after that. She made excuses and dodged questions. There was no hiding the fact that she was having doubts now.

"It just seems like such a bad time every time I go to do it Ronnie. I'm confused. When I'm with Nick, I want to be with him, but then you make me feel so…"

"I don't know what kind of game you're playing here Aubrey, but I told you, I won't do this. I can't do this, not to my brother. It's wrong. You're using my love for you to manipulate me, and I can't do this anymore." With that, Ronnie jumped out of the bed, and grabbed his clothes from off the floor. As he started to get dressed, Aubrey sat up in bed, naked but for the sheet covering her lap.

"Ronnie, don't go. Please. I'm sorry I'm hurting you." Ronnie looked back at her, so beautiful, but not his. Never was his and he was starting to believe she never would be.

"I can't Aubs, I can't do this anymore. I'm sick to my stomach with what we're doing here." Ronnie looked at her one more time, as if taking a mental snapshot of her in all her glory, and walked out the door.

………………………………………………..

Eddie walked into Sully's at about 5:30 right during the rush. A few people shouted out Latekka and Hail Eddie when they caught sight of him. He smiled and waved here and there, trying to decide where to sit. Nick made the decision for them by grabbing a booth in the corner. Within minutes, Owen and Ikey came in and found them. They sat down and started talking about the game that was on the night before. Eddie tuned them out, he just wanted to see Janet, needed to see her, and maybe this would finally get her out of his system. Surely when he saw her all the anger would come bubbling back to the surface, squashing any doubts he had about ending things with her.

Then, he saw her. She was carrying a tray of pints to a table across the bar. She held it over her head with the proficiency known only to a waitress that had been slinging beers forever. She handed out beers and chatted away, not even noticing he was there. Then she threw her head back and laughed and it was like music carrying over the noise of the crowd. She blushed at something one of the jerks at the table said to her and shook her head as if to say no. _What the hell was she still doing chattin' with those assholes? Just deliver the damn beer and walk away. Do your job! There were other people that needed their food and drinks too._ And before he even realized what he was doing, Eddie stood up and started towards the table. Owen grabbed him by the shoulder and snapped him back to reality.

"Don't go there buddy. She's just doing her job. I know you're pissed and I know you miss her, but you don't want to go there Eddie. Just leave her be." Eddie sighed and sat back down. What the hell was wrong with him? What was he gonna do, beat the guy up?

"Thanks O, I owe you big time for that one." Eddie slumped in his seat trying hard not to meet Nick's eyes. He knew if he looked at him, his eyes would say 'I told you so.'

Janet watched Eddie every chance she got. She tried not to be too obvious, only steeling glances from afar and when his back was turned. Luckily it was crowded so she could hide in the crowd and have her fill at times. Seeing him was like breathing fresh country air. It was invigorating. She mentally kicked herself for the thousandth time for messing up what was sure to be a perfect relationship. As she was looking at him, his head turned slightly and their eyes locked. Shocked, but mesmerized, she couldn't look away. They held each other's gaze for what seemed like an eternity and then, he smiled. It was that slow easy smile that was 100 Eddie Latekka. Then, just that quick, it was gone and replaced with a frown. He knit his brows and said something to himself under his breath and turned away. As strong as Janet tried to be at that moment she just couldn't hold it in anymore, she ran from the bar to the back, crying all the way there.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

If anyone had told Eddie that he could ever be bewitched by a woman, he would have laughed them off. But in that moment, when their eyes met, that was the only way he could describe it. It was like coming home. Just as he smiled, thinking of taking her in his arms again, he remembered why he shouldn't, why he couldn't. She would never be his Janet anymore, Rooster had seen to that. He noticed the stricken look on Janet's face immediately and then he saw her turn and run to the backroom. He wanted to go to her, but pride and hurt kept him in his seat. Eddie flagged Karen down and ordered another round of beers as well as a few shots for himself. He noticed the looks the guys were passing back and forth to each other, but he didn't care anymore. Better to drink and wallow instead of think about all that was lost.

Pulling herself back together, Janet came back out to the main bar and immediately diverted her gaze anywhere but at Eddie's table. The night passed quickly when it was crowded and despite her breakdown, it was business as usual. At about 8:30, she glanced over to his table and was surprised to see he was still there with the guys. They had ordered food now and looked like they were settling in for the night. She groaned inwardly. It looked like it was going to be a long night after all.

Eddie had at least a half dozen beers and shots. He had lost count which usually meant he was over his limit. He waved Karen down to order another draft but she told him he was cut off. About to make a ruckus, the guys quieted him down and ordered more food instead. It was close to midnight and Eddie refused to leave. Nick was worried, Ikey had fallen asleep and Owen was half drunk himself. Eddie looked around, there were only a few other patrons left in the place. He stood up and started to walk towards the bar, to his stool, where Janet usually took his order. As he was getting up, Nick tried to pull him back down.

"Guys, can you help me out here, he's on the move." Nick kicked Ikey none too gently under the table and Owen, bleary eyed just grunted and said, "Let the man go. He wants to talk to her. Leave him be Nicky."

"Eddie, listen to me man, you're drunk. Are you sure this is what you want to do?" It was at that moment that Eddie turned around and faced Nick. He had tears in his eyes.

"I don't know what to do man. But I need to hold her and kiss her. Tell her I love her. I love her and I hate her. Why did she do this? Why couldn't she just have a little more faith in me? Faith in us?"

And Eddie walked towards the bar, leaving Nick calling his name behind him. All that mattered now was Janet. He wanted to run his hands through her hair. He wanted to throw her out a window for sleeping with another man. He wanted to kiss those lips until that new lipstick came off. He wanted to hurt her like she had hurt him. He wanted to hold her tight and never let her go. He didn't want her at all and yet he wanted her forever. By the time he reached her, he was thoroughly confused. He cleared his throat and said her name in his husky voice.

"Janet…" Janet swirled around at the sound of her name. It had been over a month since she heard her name from his lips and yet, it felt like yesterday.

"Eddie?"

He moved to her quickly, grabbed her by her upper arms and just held her there, looking at her, taking her in. Her face looked a little thinner and her eyes had shadows under them which she had tried to hide with makeup. Her eyes, so beautiful, held a sadness that he had rarely seen in them. His face was hard and his eyes had tears in them, then it softened, then it was hard again. He fought for control. All the while he was holding her, his grip got tighter and tighter. She took the pain, realizing his struggle, he wanted to hurt her, but he also wanted to kiss her. At last, the kiss won out. In one fell swoop, he was devouring her mouth, kissing her cheek, her neck, running his fingers through her hair. He was whispering her name with such need. He was running his hands down her back and to her butt where he squeezed and massaged like he always did when he was trying to get her to go to bed with him. He didn't care that he was in the middle of the bar and she was supposed to be working. He just wanted this moment. A song started playing, he didn't know what it was, it was slow and sexy, and he started to sway with her, holding her tightly against him.

"Eddie, what does this mean? Where do we go from…." He cut her off with another kiss. He wanted to get his fill. God how he missed this, missed her. It was so right and yet, he couldn't get Rooster and Janet out of his mind. Images of her and Rooster, naked flashed through his head. Did they do it at her place, in her bed? The same bed they shared? Did she do things with him that she hadn't done with Eddie? Did she kiss Rooster the way she kissed him just now? Like he was her world? He backed away from her shaking his head.

"I…I'm sorry. I can't. I don't know how to… I loved you. Did you know that?" He looked down at her face and saw the sadness there again. "I still love you but I can't even look at you without seeing the two of you together." Janet looked crestfallen.

"I understand Eddie. I do. I'm so sorry I hurt you, there was no excuse. And Eddie? I love you too." She took her hand and put it around his neck, drawing him down to her once again. She kissed him with all the love she had stored inside her. Then she broke the kiss and walked away.

Nick was there in an instant, tugging on Eddie's arm.

"It's okay buddy, let's get you home. I think you did what you came to do. Come on, a nice walk to Best Friend Windows will do you some good." Nick grabbed Eddie's jacket, said goodnight to Ikey and Owen and pushed Eddie out the front door of Sully's. Stumbling down the sidewalk, Eddie lifted the arm of one of his shirt sleeves and inhaled her scent. God he missed her. She felt so right in his arms. Had he just old her he loved her? After she cheated on him? He immediately felt like an idiot. The alcohol must have really loosened his tongue. But wait, did she say she loved him too?

"Nicky…" Eddie started, but lost the words. How did you describe this feeling? Nick put his arm around Eddie's shoulder.

"I know buddy. It's hard, but it will get easier. I can't tell you what to do, but it will become clearer with time. Just gotta give it time."

"Take me home Nicky. I just want to sleep. Maybe in the morning things will look better."

"Anything you need Eddie, I'm here and I ain't going anywhere."

……………………………………

At about 3:30 am, Janet let herself into her house. She no longer walked around touching everything that reminded her of Eddie. She had washed his socks that lay by the hamper and she stopped wearing his clothes to bed. She was getting better and working her way over him. She had done all of this because she didn't think there was a chance but then, tonight, he had kissed her and told her he loved her, still loves her, despite himself. For the first time in a month, Janet began to hope.

After she'd showered, she was walking to the kitchen in her robe when she heard a car outside. Curious and just a little bit nosy, she peeked through her curtains and saw Eddie's truck outside. She could barely make him out in the front seat but it was him for sure. He just sat there for what seemed to be an eternity. Then he got out. He stood at his car door and looked at her house four a while. His shoulders sagged and he got back in the truck and drove away. So much for hope. Janet cried herself to sleep.

………………………………….

Eddie got home just before dawn. After leaving Janet's place, he drove over to Rooster's house and sat outside. He seriously contemplated kicking down his door so he could knock him the hell out. After a few minutes, he realized that he would probably end up killing him and going to jail. Instead, he drove around for about an hour and then went home.

Phil was awake, which was unusual at this hour.

"What are you doing up so early?" Eddie placed his jacket on the coat rack. He was exhausted but he didn't dare go to bed. He wouldn't be able to wake up in the few hours before he needed to make it into the office. Even though he was his "own man" Eddie felt it was important to go into the office everyday.

"I could ask you the same question. Did you even sleep at all last night?" Phil walked towards the kitchen and Eddie followed a sense of foreboding coming over him. Phil was in the mood to _talk._

"Yeah, I tied one on at Sully's and Nicky brought me home about 1. I slept till about 3:30 and then went out to get my truck." Eddie averted his eyes and started taking out the coffee grinds and filters.

"By my memory, it only takes about 15 minutes to hump your way over to Sully's. Where have you been for the last 3 hours?" Eddie fell silent, seemingly lost in his task of measuring out the coffee to put in the filter. Phil leaned against the kitchen counter, looked him dead in the face and lifted an eyebrow.

"Okay, so I drove over to Janet's place and thought about going in and sleeping with her. I didn't. I didn't even make it past my truck door. Then I left, angry as hell that I couldn't be with the woman I love because of her stupidity and Rooster's selfishness. So I drove over to his place and contemplated all the ways I could murder him. Realizing I'd probably end up bunking with Matt Lausch in a cell, I drove for about an hour on some God-forsaken back roads and came home. I just needed to clear my head is all. This whole situation is driving me crazy Phiz. So, I assume Nicky filled you in on what went down tonight?"

"Yeah, he told me what went down at Sully's. Eddie, you got to pull it together. As much as I loathe what Janet did, I can understand where she was mentally when she did it. I can even understand what Rooster was thinking of when he did it. And I understand why you're angry too, but I don't think Janet would have ever stepped out on you if she thought you were still together. She's Janet; she acts first, usually rashly and thinks second."

"But it doesn't excuse what she's done…" Eddie kicked his foot on the edge of the kitchen table.

No, it doesn't. But I think…" Phil paused, trying to choose his words carefully. "I think there are different reasons for infidelity and none of them are okay, but some are more understandable than others. I remember her in high school, do you? She was always being called names and being picked on. Hell up until you started dating her Ikey was still calling her Janet the Planet."

"You know what Phiz, I've heard this song and dance before. I feel bad for what she went through, but that doesn't have shit to do with me. I always treated her right. I always put myself out there for her to know I was with her and only her. Why should I have suffered for what someone else did to her so long ago?"

"Because who she was then has a lot to do with who she is now; surely you realize that Eddie? Your past makes up an important part of who you become in the present. I mean, let's not forget that you stood her up for your date to the Rowen's birthday party, furthering her thoughts that she wasn't good enough for you."

Eddie threw his hand up in the air in disgust. "This again?!? Jesus, I felt bad about that, but I would think that the seven months we were together afterwards that would have let her know that I was with her and not going anywhere!"

"But your initial reaction was to be ashamed of her. Wasn't it?" Phil asked this last question gently.

Eddie struggled to come up with the right words. He couldn't lie on the spot; it just wasn't in him to do. Embarrassed as he was by his behavior back then, he knew it to be true.

"Embarrassed might be a little strong Phiz. I think she's beautiful, I always did, but…"

"But you were worried other people wouldn't, right?"

Irritated, Eddie snapped, "Is there a point to this?"

"Heck yeah there's a point. She may have ended up with you, but you left a few scars along the way. The first thing that comes out of everyone's mouth when Rory is mentioned is hot. Add on top of that is the fact that she dumped you leading you to your Casanova ways. Then, to put icing on the cake, you lied to Janet repeatedly throughout the day simply by omission, which wouldn't have been so bad, had she not already known that Rory was in town. Then, she sees you kissing Rory, in front of your house, in the middle of the evening where anyone could see. Clearly you had no respect for what you two had, or you wouldn't be doing that. Clearly she was witnessing the end of her relationship with you."

"Hey, I think that's a bit of a stretch, don't you? I mean she could have asked me, should have come to me." Phil went on ruthlessly, taking Eddie aback; making Eddie hear all the thoughts that had probably run through Janet's head that night.

"What if she did and you told her another lie. What if she did and found you in bed with Rory. What if she did and you told her to get out of here Janet the Planet, I never loved you anyway? I'm just playing devil's advocate here. Personally man, I think Janet has some issues that she needs to work out. The real question is, are you man enough to stand by her to work through them?"

Phil poured his coffee and left Eddie standing in the kitchen alone to think over what had just been said.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Two months after Robert had been diagnosed with bone marrow cancer, and 6 weeks after he started chemo therapy, he still wasn't used to the fear that came over him every time he set foot in the hospital for his treatment. On some days, Nick was able to go with him, other times it was Ronnie. On a really bad day, he went by himself. Today was a better day; Leslie had come with him for his chemo since she was able to get away from the college for a while. When she was able to come with him, it always made it easier. They'd talk and laugh, or sometimes they would just sit together in companionable silence and read magazines and the paper. She always understood his mood and always seemed to know what he needed, even before he did.

Today was no different. They sat together while he was being pumped full of radiation. He was reading the paper and Leslie was grading some essays. He never thought he could love anyone as much as Caroline, but then, life was full of surprises.

He thought back to the day they met. She was stepping out of her shiny new car while he was backing up his delivery truck and almost ran her over! Jumping out, he was already apologizing profusely, until he had looked up into her eyes. They were so deep, so dark, and so beautiful. He was struck dumb, right there on the spot. He gave her a slow perusal and decided that this classy lady was very well put together. She was talking a mile a minute, angry that he wasn't more careful and he said the first thing that came to his mind, what he wanted most of all. 'Have dinner with me.' The rest was, as they say, is history.

He looked over at her now, her hair was all curly today and down just at her shoulders. Dating a Black woman had _really_ been an education when it came to hair. She had more hair products than_ she _could even keep track of and a versatility that still amazed him. But despite the way she always seem to change it up (she said it was to keep him on his toes) she had been wearing her hair like this more often, simply because he commented on how pretty she looked with it that way. When Robert thought about it, she was pretty easy to understand too. Everything falling into place Robert put down his paper and looked at Leslie.

"I'm gonna beat this thing." He said it with conviction. She never looked up or stopped writing, just simply stated what was on her mind.

"Of course you are. There was never any doubt in my mind." She didn't say it with condescension; it was just a matter of fact.

"Marry me."

Leslie's hand froze mid scribble. She looked up at him across the room, IV in one arm, a heart monitor hooked to his chest, she smiled. In spite of his illness, in spite of his orneriness, she loved this man. "Yes Robert, I'll marry you."

The left side of his mouth quirked up in a cocky half grin and he nodded his head once. He held her gaze for a few more seconds in what he liked to call a mental caress and then went right back to reading the paper. Leslie went back to her grading, a huge smile on her face.

…………………………………………………………..

It had been over a month since Phil had read Eddie the riot act about what Janet was possibly thinking that night she betrayed him but he still couldn't seem to get past it. Finally he decided he would go and talk to her. Ask her some questions that kept running around his head. It was summertime now and the heat was really kicking up, even in the evening. Today was a record high for this time of the year at 98 F. Since that night at Sully's where he held her and kissed her and told her he loved her, he hadn't spoken to her again. Sure there were times they'd run into each other on the street and said awkward hellos, or just nod to each other, but that had been it. He tended to avoid Sully's on the day's she was working, and he did everything he could not to kill Rooster each and every time he saw him. He was trying to move on but had yet been able to do so. He missed her as his lover, but also as his friend.

It was about 9 in the evening when he drove up to her place. This time he would go inside. He got out of his truck and rang the doorbell. He waited a few seconds and rang it again and mid ring, she opened the door abruptly in annoyance.

"Hold your horses…" Janet became speechless, which was no small feat.

"I'm sorry for just drop…" Eddie couldn't get the words out. She looked beautiful. She was wearing a dress he had never seen before. He looked her up and down. It was purple with bright yellow flowers all over it. It had thin straps and he was pretty sure she wasn't wearing a bra because he could see the outline of her nipples through the thin fabric. Gazing downward he noticed her feet were bare and her toes were painted a pretty pink color that made him think of cotton candy.

Oh this man. There should be a law against looking this good. In deference to the heat, he was wearing a black t-shirt and jeans, with some converse sneakers. Eddie rarely wore sneakers, usually opting for his construction boots. But today he looked relaxed, and sexy and even a little happy.

"How have you been?" She asked him, still standing in the doorway, not quite sure what to do.

"I've been good. Uh.. you?" Eddie stared at her. Her hair was even longer than before and it was so shiny. He noticed there was some sweat trickling down between her breasts. He swallowed.

"I've been okay I guess, still living." Eddie was hot, the heat was just kicking it up a notch. His t-shirt was already wet in the back and under his arms.

"It's a boiler today, huh? Uh, do you mind if I come in?" Janet jumped a little, half surprised she hadn't realized she didn't invite him in yet.

"Oh, of course Eddie… sorry. I'll warn you though, it's not much better in here. My AC conked out on me in the living room, so I only have it in the bedroom right now."

"Oh yeah? When did that happen?" Eddie strolled in the place like he had never left. He put his keys in the tray on the side table. He walked over to the couch and plopped down as if he had never left to begin with. Unsure as to what to do, Janet paced around and finally settled down next to him on the couch. They were on the same couch, but as far apart as was possible.

"Few days ago. Ray said he come by and take a look at it when he had some time. Maybe this weekend." Eddie visibly tensed. He still didn't buy that Ray had nothing to do with the beating Eddie got, but he didn't have proof. Schooling himself to relax, he shifted his focus back on Janet.

"You look great. Your hair is longer and that dress is new." Eddie said it in an almost accusing manner. Janet was surprised. If she didn't know better, she'd think he was angry. Giggling self-consciously she ran her hands through her hair.

"About a month ago, Hannah and Pizza Girl took me to Boston, as a little girls getway. We went to a spa and I left with this hair. He enhanced my color as he would say. Made it a little brighter and he suggested I grow it out a few more inches to give it a heavier look. I kinda like it this way. Anyway, we went shopping too, hence the dress." She plucked at the hem of the dress which now that they were sitting was well above the knee.

"You go out today in that thing?" He cursed himself right after the words had left his mouth. Great, now she'd know he was jealous. Janet however seemed oblivious to his meaning.

"Well, it's not really appropriate for working in a bar now is it? I just put it on after I got out of the shower. It's just so damn hot in here, you know?"

"Oh yeah, it's pretty hot." Eddie held her gaze and then shook it off. Damned if he could even remember what he wanted to talk about. Since he couldn't remember, he got up and walked to the window where the AC unit was sitting. He lifted off the cover and turned the unit on. It was blowing, but also making a hissing sound. The air wasn't cool either. He turned it off. "Be right back." He walked out the door, but left it open. Curious, Janet got up from the couch and saw him head to his truck. Her heart was in her throat because she thought he was leaving, but he just went to the truck bed and got his toolbox. He walked back into her place, lingered at the door giving her another slow perusal. Then he went to the window and started taking things apart. Periodically he would walk to the sink, rinse a part here and there. He was doing all kinds of things she didn't understand, but she was under spell and couldn't find any words to say. Eventually he started putting things back together. Once he put the cover back, he turned the unit on. It roared back to life and was spitting out relatively cool air. "You're gonna need to get some freon for it to get that extra AC cool, but this should at least make it more comfortable in here." He was packing up his things, getting ready to leave. He walked to the door and had his hand on the doorknob when Janet spoke.

"Thanks so much." Janet looked down at her feet. She really was at a loss for words. Why had he come here? What did all of this mean? Not being able to stand it anymore, she finally asked him. "Why did you come over tonight? Not that I'm not happy to see you, but..uhm…" She let the question hang for a minute. She looked up at him and he was considering her question, she could tell by the look on his face.

"I'm not really sure."

"Oh."

"I think I wanted to ask you some questions about… well, you know.. that night?" Eddie said it slowly as if it would spare both of them the pain of remembering.

"Oh. I see. Okay, what do you want to know?"

"Were you drunk?"

"Yes. Very drunk."

"Did you… did you enjoy it?" Eddie was watching her closely, as if he was gauging her answers and putting them on a scorecard.

"No, I cried afterwards. I regretted it immediately. I don't even remember the details. It's all kinda fuzzy, part drunken haze, part repression I think."

Eddie was quiet for a moment.

"Did you do it here? In your bed?"

Now Janet started to cry. "Yeah, we did. I called Rooster crying, told him to bring booze that I needed a friend. So yeah, it happened here and moved to the bedroom."

Eddie looked pissed. He stared at her and rolled his eyes. "Did it ever occur to you to stop? Why didn't you stop before it was too late?"

"Because at that point, I was feeling my lowest Eddie, I was feeling pretty worthless if you want to know the truth. I was drunk and depressed, clearly not my strongest state. I was imaging that Rooster was you and that nothing had changed, that's how I got through it. I'm not trying to make excuses; I'm just telling you what I was thinking at the time."

"I see." He turned the knob and pulled her front door open, ready to step outside.

"You forgot to ask me something."

Eddie turned around closing the door. Searching his mind for anything he could have possibly forgotten, he came up short. "What did I forget to ask you? I think I know more than I wanted to know."

"True. But you forgot to ask me if I still love you. You forgot to ask me if I still crave you. You forgot to ask me if it was the biggest mistake of my life ruining what we had. You forgot to ask me if I miss you in the morning having coffee together. If I miss you at night holding me, making love to me. If, even though I don't deserve you, you forgot to ask me if I want you back. I just wanted to point those questions out, in case you forgot to ask them."

Eddie struggled with composure. It should have been so different; declaring their love for each other, finally reaching that level of unshakable commitment. All of it reduced to ashes as if all their hopes and dreams had been burned in a giant bonfire.

"You're right, you're absolutely right. But those answers are easier to hear. I needed to hear the hard one's first."

"And now that you have?"

"Now that I have, I need some time to think, some space to think it over." He paused, making a conscious decision to ask her one more question. "But tonight, I want something else that only you can give me."

"What's that Eddie?" Janet's pulse started racing, Eddie was getting that uncomfortable longing look in his eyes, like he couldn't stand one more minute of being apart from her.

"You know what I want." Grabbing her and backing her against the wall, he smothered her with kisses. He ran his hands all over her, making her moan in pleasure. Running his hands under the hem of her dress he groaned when he realized she was totally naked underneath. He lifted her dress over her head and tugged it off. Her hair was spilled down her back and her lips were already puffy from kissing. Fumbling with the front of his jeans, Janet sighed in relief when she was able to free him and hold him skin to skin. She pulled his t-shirt off of him and threw it on the floor. Pants and boxers down around his ankles Eddie hoisted her up and joined her. It was fast and almost violent. Their need for each other was so great it could barely be contained. They cried each other's name almost in unison as they each climaxed.

Panting as if they had just run a half marathon, they slowly separated. Janet was kissing his chest, his arms, running her fingers through his hair. She went to put her hand on his cheek, when he grabbed her hand. The look on his face stopped her short.

"Don't." Eddie almost pleaded with her.

Janet quickly bent down to get her dress and used it to half cover herself. Eddie pulled his pants and boxers up, walked over to get his t-shirt, looked at her one last time and walked out the door.

_Disclaimer: I have no experience with cancer or cancer patients. All accounts are based on what I learned from reading novels and/or watching tv. Please excuse any inaccuracies._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

After the door closed, Janet sank to the floor. She started out trembling slightly, but within minutes she was shaking uncontrollably. Whether it was from the cool air in the room or the fact that Eddie had just walked out the door after treating her like a two dollar hooker, she wasn't really sure. She had yet to cover herself; she just sat there on her floor in complete shock. Had he just left? Had he really just left? Walked out the door without even a word? No. Eddie wouldn't do that to me. He would not do that to me. HE WOULD NOT DO THAT TO ME. She sat on the floor, repeating that mantra over and over in her head… _he would not do that to me…_

Eddie went to his truck and started it up. He drove halfway down the block and pulled over. God, what the hell had he just done? He shouldn't have even gone there tonight, much less treat Janet like she was some kind of tramp. There were very few times that Eddie felt he had made a decision so bad that he couldn't hold his head up high. This was one of those times. Sighing in frustration, he decided to call Janet and apologize for leaving the way he did. Flipping open his phone he called her cell phone. It went straight to voicemail, so he tried her house phone. It just rang and rang. Curious and a little worried, he turned his truck around and went back to her place.

Walking up to her front door, he rang the doorbell and waited. Maybe she had gone in the shower and he was just being ridiculous. He rang it again and still got no answer. Debating whether or not to use it, he fished in his pocket for his key ring. Janet had given him a key to her place that morning Rory came back with a note saying 'here's the key to my heart.' He had put it on his key ring immediately and it never occurred to him to take it off. Sliding the key into the lock, he opened the door slightly and started to call her name.

"Jan…" She was on the floor rocking, curled up with the dress still clinging in front of her. Eddie crouched down to talk to her, soothe her. He felt awful now. Clearly she was hurting over him leaving the way he did. He went to lift her face up to his but Janet wasn't crying; she was angry. Janet, stopped rocking, and turned her head to look at him. Her eyes were blazing with a fury that could scorch the earth.

"Are you done?"

"What?"

"I said, ARE YOU DONE?"

"What? What are you talking about? Done with what?"

"Hurting me? Did you get your fill?" Eddie hung his head. _She_ had hurt _him_, but he was the one being made to feel bad. Resisting the urge to lash out, he spoke truthfully instead.

"Truthfully Janet, I don't know." Janet was still looking at him straight in the eyes. Her gaze hadn't wavered, but tears started flowing down her face. She nodded once.

"Okay. Just wanted to know where I stood with you." She looked away from him and took the dress and slipped it back over herself. With a dignity befitting a queen, she stood up, walked to the front door and held it open for him. Eddie got up from his position on the floor and walked to the door.

"Janet, I'm really sorry about tonight. It's just that I'm really confused is all and I guess I'm still angry with you." He blew out a breath and ran his hand through his hair. "I'm not sure what I want anymore, if there is a future for us, you gotta be patient…"

Janet cut him off. "Eddie, I never meant to hurt you. That's the God's honest truth. But after you left tonight, I sat there thinking you wouldn't just do that to me. Not on purpose, not intentionally. And at first, I thought I deserved it. That's how pathetically messed up I am. I thought being with Eddie, even like this is better than nothing at all. But you know what? It's not. I deserve better than this. I made a mistake, but I'll be damned if I am going to pay for it over and over again. You won't ever be happy with me again Eddie, so let's just stop fooling ourselves that you can. I know it's my fault and I take all the responsibility for it, but I am not going to continue putting myself out there for you to slap me around. I'm not a masochist!"

"Wait, you're getting mad at me? After what you did, you're going to try to flip this one on me?" Eddie was losing his patience; fast. Janet, reached out her hand, and held his, soothing him and calming him down.

"Here's the thing Eddie, I'm not mad at you, I'm just resigned. I knew… I knew that day in the hospital when I told you the truth it was going to be over. But I had messed up and I felt you deserved to know the truth. And that first month, I was in a really bad way. But slowly, I tried to find happiness again in the day to day. And I was doing okay, not great, but I was doing okay. Then you came into Sully's and you kissed me and told me you loved me and you gave me hope. And I held onto that hope for over a month now. And tonight, you came here and my heart all but leapt into my throat at the site of you because I thought maybe you had found it in your heart to do the impossible and forgive me. But I was wrong, wasn't I? So no Eddie, I'm not mad at you; I've just decided not to let you punish me anymore."

"Janet…"

"There's nothing more to say Eddie. I hope you can find happiness one day, you deserve that. I really mean it." She was slowly nudging him out the door and before he realized what had happened, the door was closing behind him.

Standing on her porch in a bit of a shock, he thought about using the key again to make her talk to him. But her words had hit close to home. As much as he wanted to forgive her, he couldn't seem to do it. And a small part of him took pleasure in getting her hopes up and then bringing them crashing down. He didn't want to be that guy, but it was what he had become. He went to his truck and drove home sadder than he had been than when they first broke up.

…………………………………………………….

For almost two months, Matt Lausch sat in a jail cell waiting for a miracle to happen. Ray promised him his lawyers would get him off with a slap on the wrist, but it didn't seem to be as easy as they thought. The first thing that went wrong was the charges were actually attempted manslaughter as opposed to aggravated assault. The prior held a heavier sentence and almost always mandatory jail time. They had denied him bail. Apparently, unbeknownst to him, his little town had been experiencing a crime wave and now he was being made an example of. Turns out the District Attorney was running for re-election. Everything was going to hell in a hand basket and Matt was going down in flames. But he had a wild card, and if he hit that two month mark and Ray still didn't come through for him, by God, he would use it.

………………………………………………………

"Nick, we need to talk." Nick noticed that something was on Aubrey's mind all day. She was pretending to study, but she hadn't turned the page on her reading in over half an hour. He was hoping like hell she would explain why all of a sudden they had become an abstinent couple. She was either never in the mood or having to study for this test or that. He was all for taking a break once in a while, but this was getting ridiculous. When he thought about it, they hadn't had sex in well over a month.

"What's up?" Nick fully expected her to bring up their lack of physical contact lately, but she surprised him.

"Ronnie's in love with me." Aubrey was looking him straight in the face, as if to gauge his reaction to this news. Nick smiled and nodded his head.

"Earth to Aubrey, that's no newsflash. Did you just figure it out? The guy can't even speak half the time when you're in the room."

"I guess I just thought it was the way Ronnie is. You know, half nervous and rambling all the time."

"Well, he is, kind of like that when you're not around. But it kicks up a notch when you come over or he sees you." Nick was still smiling as he went back to typing on his computer.

"And it doesn't bother you?"

"Why should it? It's not like he'd ever act on it or anything. Besides, it's a crush, puppy love. It's not like you're in love with him too. Now that would be a problem!" Nick's back was turned to Aubrey as he continued to type on the computer. Aubrey had a stricken look on her face.

"Yeah, that would be something, wouldn't it?" Courage gone, Aubrey went back to not studying for her exam in the morning. She missed Ronnie, but he wouldn't take any of her calls. When she went over to the house, he's make up an excuse to leave. He was avoiding her, or giving her space, she wasn't sure which, either way, she didn't like it.

Nick continued to type but the words on the screen wasn't making any sense to him. What was Aubrey playing at? They were having some serious issues in their relationship and she brings up his brother? Trying not to even go there with his thoughts, he highlighted the last few lines he typed and deleted them, determined not to think the worst of his girlfriend, or his brother.


	7. Chapter 7

_(I thought it would be interesting to bring some characters in from Season 1. I just watched it again for the billionth time!)_

**Chapter 7**

Janet was busy drying pint glasses when Steve walked in the door. He had broad shoulders and a commanding presence. There was no doubt from his air of authority that he was a cop. Tall but solid, he had a shaved head and brown skin. He oftentimes came into Sully's in the morning before his shift for coffee; light and sweet. He never drank alcohol, that she knew of, at least not here and all his other friends were the cops on the force. He was building a house outside the 'city limits' and he always had a funny story to tell her about the process and yet he always seemed to be good natured about it.

She had met him that night when Eddie got into a fight with that college kid from the Duff. Granted, the kid had knocked Eddie out (much to everyone's surprise) but Eddie almost got arrested. Steve, having played football with him in high school, let him go with a warning. Grateful that he didn't arrest Eddie, who was just her friend at the time, Janet offered him a cup of coffee on the house and asked him if he was hungry. He took the coffee and returned the next day after that for another. It had become his habit to stop in everyday he was working for that first morning cup.

"Hey Janet! Good morning!"

"Hey Steve. How goes the house-building?"

"Well, you know, it's never a good thing when…." Steve rambled on and on about the house shenanigans as Janet poured his coffee in a to-go cup. She laughed and smiled at him and it gave him the courage to do what he hadn't been able to do before. When he had finally gotten up the courage to ask her out last year, he found out she was dating Eddie. Waiting for it to end, he was surprised when it didn't. But then he shouldn't have been, Latekka had just figured out what he had, Janet was a great girl. Then he started dating Trish and fell in love. Unfortunately, Trishia had broken up with him, and now he was nursing a broken heart, much like Janet.

"…so, that's what happened. But it's all good. Everything will work out in the end. So, hey, I was thinking, maybe you'd like to come out and see the place. I know I've shown you pictures, but nothing beats the real thing? And maybe we could catch dinner beforehand… the place looks better at night, stars overhead, pond shimmering in the back. The porch is already up…I could put some chairs out and we could maybe watch the sunset." Damn, he was a rambling fool. It all sounded so lame. He really just wanted to be with Trishia again, now he regretted asking Janet out.

Janet had his coffee in her hand and just stared at him with her mouth agape. Mentally shaking herself, she snapped out of it and quickly blurted out the first thing on her mind.

"Didn't you and Trishia just break up? I mean you guys were going hot and heavy, Steve. Are you sure you're ready to date again? And besides, Eddie and I broke up because I slept with someone else. I mean, that's the kinda thing a person should know if he's gonna taker her out." Janet looked down at her shoes, ashamed. She assumed that no one would want to date her when they heard this news, though in the Ridge, she found it hard to believe there was anyone who didn't know. Besides, she was pretty sure Steve wasn't over Trishia, she sure as hell knew she wasn't over Eddie.

Steve reached across the bar, took his coffee from her hand and set it on the counter. Then he took her hand and gently pulled her closer to him, the bar separating them, he held it and said, "I know Janet, but that doesn't mean you don't deserve a second chance at happiness, that you don't deserve to get back out there, try new waters maybe? And you're right, I probably would just compare you to Trishia all night, even though you're a great person. I've always found you attractive, did you know that? Yeah, I was just getting up the nerve to ask you out when I found out about you and Eddie." Smiling andd now laughing at himself he continued, "But I quickly got over it 'cause I met Trish." He looked sad and regretful. She knew it had nothing to do with her and everything to do with Trishia.

Deciding that what Steve really needed was a friend instead of a date, she agreed with a condition. "Okay. But, let's not call it a date. Let's say it's two friends, commiserating over their love life's with dinner and a tour thrown in. I don't know about you, but I can never have too many friends. What do you say? I'm free tomorrow night if that works with your schedule."

Steve gave her a hundred watt smile and looked relieved. "That sounds perfect Janet. I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking asking you on a date when all I really want is to be with Trishia again. But getting together as friends sounds great. How about I pick you up at 5:30, your place? Maybe we could try that new Italian place on 3rd street. Then head out to my place before sunset."

"Yeah, that sounds good. I'll see you tomorrow night."

"Bye Janet. And thanks." Steve walked out of Sully's with an extra spring in his step. He may not be with Trishia anymore, but he had the feeling he was about to make a really good friend in Janet.

…………………………………………………….

Eddie decided to start dating again, jump back into the saddle as they say. He asked the new girl at the pharmacy out and she smiled and giggled, but respectfully told him no. Surprised (he had never been shot down before, EVER!) he just gave her a half smile and walked away, not even bothering with the purchases he wanted.

That afternoon, he went into the bakery, and asked Lottie out. She laughed at him and said, "Latekka, get real!" Astonished, he backed out of the bakery with as much dignity he could muster. Running through his thoughts, it occurred to him that he might have been "out" with Lottie already and it was not the ending she was looking for.

Even later in the day, he was in the hardware store, ordering some supplies when Darcy walked over to him and started chatting. Surprised that she didn't serve him with a left hook (she was one of many that had been a conquest back in his sampling days), he turned on the Latekka charm and asked her if she'd like to try going out on a date again. She considered him for a long time. Then she smiled. It was nothing compared to Janet's smile, but it was okay enough. Giving himself a mental shake, he tried to focus on the woman in front of him.

"Let's go outside for a minute, and have a little chat." Surprised, Eddie nodded and gave her that slow and sexy smile.

Once outside, she turned to him and wasn't all smiles anymore. _Uh-oh_.

"What goes on Darcy? If you're gonna ream me out, I'd just as soon skip that part."

"Oh, I'm not going to ream you out Eddie, I just want to talk to you."

"What gives?"

"Well, I was really pissed with you Eddie, I mean really pissed. The way you treated me last year? Sleeping with me and never calling? That was real low. Then seeing you after over two weeks and you acting like it was no big deal? I don't sleep around Eddie, but like most of the single girls in the Ridge, I was stupid enough to fall for you."

"Oh, hey Darc…I'm sorry about that. I was a world-class jerk back then. I'll admit, I wasn't the nicest guy a girl could end up with. But I've changed, I wouldn't treat a woman like that anymore and I can assure…"

Darcy cut him off. "I know you've changed Eddie. Everyone knows you've changed. And I am glad you have. You were running out of options anyway. When I first heard about you and Janet and that kiss at Sully's? I thought that poor thing. He's gonna dump her right after he gets her in bed. Then I started hearing all those rumors, which I eventually witnessed to be true, Eddie had a girlfriend. Someone was finally able to snag him, settle him down. I still didn't believe it, I figured you had to be cheating. I mean to go from a different girl every other day down to one? Impossible. So I waited for the gossip mill, waited to hear who else you were sleeping with, and it never happened. I noticed the way you two were with each other. I'd go into Sully's and you'd be sitting at that bar, waiting for her to take her home. You'd be holding hands in public, kissing! I envied that. I thought, how did she do it? How did she get Eddie to settle down with her? So, about 4 or 5 months ago, I went to Sully's to ask her. I was over you, don't get me wrong. I was so over you, but I was also so curious, I had never really met Janet, just seen her around, you know? But now, I really wanted to meet her, try to see what you saw in her."

"You went to Sully's and talked to Janet, about me?" Eddie had an incredulous look on his face.

"Yeah, I know. Not one of my shining moments, but there you have it. Anyway, I went in there fully expecting an ordinary girl, but who I met was someone extraordinary. She was so kind and she had that kind of beauty that shines from within, though I suspect that she doesn't know it. Anyway, we chatted about the weather and she made lots of jokes. It was 2 in the afternoon and the pace was virtually empty. She asked me about myself and just had an easy way about her. I didn't dare ask her about you anymore, because I didn't want her to think there was anything going on between us. But while I sat there talking to her, I could see why you chose her. She's absolutely perfect."

"I used to think so, but after what she did…"

"From what I understand, she did what she did because she thought Rory was back in the picture. I got to be honest with you Eddie; there aren't many women in the Ridge who feel like they could hold their own against Rory. I mean, my God, she was a model! What man could resist that??? And she was the only woman, until Janet, to hold your heart. Seriously, I couldn't even fathom it. And from what I also heard, she saw you two kissing, after you lied to her repeatedly all day about Rory. I don't know Eddie, we all mourn loss in different ways, and that was probably just what Janet was doing."

"So, you couldn't just tell me no, you had to advocate for Janet? Is that what this is about Darcy? I can't believe I stood here and listened to you all this time. What, are you friends with her now or something???"

"No Eddie, I'm not. I haven't really talked to Janet since that one time I went into Sully's to talk to her. It's just that you asked me out and I felt bad saying no. I know you aren't used to hearing that from women and I wanted to explain. Everyone knows you're still pining for Janet, and I doubt any woman who has listened to any form of gossip would agree to go out with you, unless they wanted to set themselves up for disappointment. That's all I'm saying."

"What, you're saying no one will date me? Not till they think I'm over Janet?"

"If they're smart, they won't. As for me? I've seen where a date with you could land a girl, so…."

"Darc, I said sorry. I really am."

Smiling now, she laughed a little bit and said, "I know you're sorry, besides, I'll probably see you tonight anyway. Ikey asked me out again and said we might stop by your place afterwards. That was actually what I was going to tell you when I asked you outside the store. But you looked so pitiful, that I felt the need to talk to you about Janet first."

"Ikey? Wait, again? You two have been seeing each other?"

"Yeah, he asked me out last week and we had a good time. We were going to just hang out at Sully's tonight and then go back to your place to watch the game. He said it was like his second home anyway. He was so sweet, he was worried I'd be upset with you and he was worried that I'd hit you or something. I assured him, there were no hard feelings anymore." Eddie thought about it; Ikey and Darcy, could work. It could really work. Clearing his throat, Eddie jiggled his keys in his pocket witha n impatient gesture.

"Well, I'm gonna run Darcy, thanks for setting me straight and telling me what was up. I wouldn't mention the asking out thing to Ikey…. It might freak him out a little. See ya around, okay?"

"Yeah Eddie, I'll see you around." Eddie started walking towards his truck when Dacry called out to him. "Eddie!" She came sprinting over to him and said, "No one would think less of you if you took her back. I mean, I think everyone is pulling for it. It's just so obvious you belong together." She patted his cheek and ran back to the hardware store.

Eddie paced his bedroom floor for anhour. He couldn't believe he had gotten shot down three times in one day! He was finally ready to start dating again, but asit turns out, according to Darcy, he was un-datable. It had been a month since him and Janet had sex and she severed all ties. On occasion he would see her on the street or in a store and they would say hello, but that was it. He was beginning to feel like he would always have that sick feeling in his stomach when he saw her. He was afraid he would always love her and never be able to move on. He wasn't angry with her anymore for what had happened and he had come to accept his small part in the big fiasco that was the demise of their relationship. But even though he had mostly forgiven her, he still couldn't bring himself to try to get back together. He couldn't exactly figure out why, he just knew he wasn't ready to try again. It might have been fear of being hurt, but he wasn't quite sure. Maybe it had more to do with Janet and her issues in the first place. If they ever had a chance at a future, she would have to learn to value herself more. And that is probably what it came down to, because if she didn't, how could she believe anyone else did?


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Darcy came by the house with Ikey that night, all smiles and looking genuinely happy. Ikey introduced her to everyone in the room. All the guys were there as well as Pizza Girl and Ronnie. Eddie smiled at her politely, not giving away that they had spoken earlier in the day. Watching them from afar, Eddie could tell she was going to become someone special to Ikey. He was happy for them both, and yet, he was envious of their situation. Turning away from the site of the happy couple, he made some excuse about needing to do some paperwork and left the house.

Eddie drove his truck and inexplicably ended up at Janet's place. As he drove by, he noticed her lights were out but her Jeep was parked out front. Looking closer at her front window, he smiled, he could see the glow of the television in the living room. Janet liked to watch movies in the dark after work. She said it helped her to unwind after a long hard day. He had gotten into the habit of watching with her, though most of the time they'd end up making love on that couch instead. She had told him, many a times that making love to him was quickly becoming her favorite way to unwind.

……………………………………….

The next evening, Janet and Steve turned a few heads as they walked down the street to the new Italian place. She knew that by morning, news of her and Steve on a 'date' would be flowing across the Ridge. She worried momentarily about what Eddie would think, but he was no longer a part of her life and she just had to accept that fact. 

Steve was the perfect gentleman the whole evening. They talked and laughed about everything humanly possible, but there was no spark. Deciding to go to his place, he paid the bill and they left. Driving up the back road, she noticed how peaceful it was away from the town. The stars were so much clearer in the sky and it was so quiet. Steve drove an old mustang convertible and had the roof down since it was such a lovely night. Wind blowing through her hair, Janet inhaled the country air and sighed in complete contentment. Finally arriving at his new place, she gasped in surprise. The pictures hadn't done it justice.

It was a low rambling house, spread out wide and long as opposed to being built up like the houses in town. A single story ranch that looked huge from the outside had a porch that wrapped around the whole house.

"Wow, the pictures don't do it justice Steve. It looks almost done."

"Thanks, let's go inside and take a look around. The outer work is just about done. On Monday, I get new windows. Eddie and Nick gave me a good price." At the sound of his name, she visibly winced.

"Sorry. Damn, that was insensitive."

"No, no, it's okay. I hear his name all the time. I guess it never occurred to me that he'd be putting in your windows. You know? But it makes sense…come on, let's look inside."

They walked through the house, Steve pointing out this feature or that; it seemed that a lot of the layout and changes were Trishia's idea and every time he pointed it out, he'd get sad.

"Why don't you just go to her? It's not like your problems are insurmountable like mine were with Eddie."

"It's her call Janet. I told her I loved her and she looked at me like I grew two heads. I guess I should have known she was too good for me anyway."

Surprised by his lack of confidence, Janet proceeded to tell him all the wonderful things about himself. Soon he was looking better and feeling more confident. They continued looking through the house, and Janet could only think, _strange, I guess I'm not the only person in this word that is unsure of themselves._

Steve dropped Janet home at around 10:30 that evening. He waited till she was inside, tooted the horn and drove off. Janet stood at the door with her keys in her hand. She was depressed and lonely. The night out with Steve had been nice, but they just ended up talking about Eddie and Trishia the whole time. She regretted that the last time her and Eddie had been together, it turned into something ugly. Looking at her keys, Janet grabbed her purse and headed back out the door.

…………………………………………..

By the time she got to Eddie's place, it was close to 11. She wondered what the hell she was doing, but her longing and her need for him was so strong, she was willing to put her pride on the line for a chance to talk to him, hold him, make love to him like never before. She knocked on the door and Phil answered. _Shit!_ She hadn't thought about the fact that she might have to face someone other than Eddie.

"Janet! Hey. Long time."

"He-ey Phil. Uhm, is Eddie here?"

Phil was surprised, but happy to see Janet. He knew that her taking the initiative would go far with Eddie. His pride had taken some blows the past few days and seeing her, coming to him, would definitely make him happy. Pride and anger aside, Phil knew his friend was really just missing the woman he loved. He hoped tonight would be the new beginning they both needed.

"Yeah, of course. Come in Janet. He's upstairs, why don't you go on up." Phil was nudging her gently towards the stairs, hand on the small of her back propelling her forward.

"Oh, I don't know as I should just go up…"

"Nonsense. He wouldn't have it any other way." With that, he gave her one final push and she started walking up the stairs. Her feet seemed to have a mind of their own, despite her mind's hesitation. Just as she was about to knock on his door, she heard Foreigner's "Fool for you Anyway" beginning to play from his room. Gaining courage, she knocked just as the song began.

"Come in!"

_Well I miss you honey  
A little more every day  
And I know if I kissed you  
You'd be comin' back home to stay_

'Cause I know I was wrong  
But how long do I have to pay?  


Eddie was lying across his bed, hands laced behind his head. The room was dark, but for the streetlight outside his window. She could barely make him out, but could tell he had showered recently and was only wearing his boxers.

_You know you belong here beside me  
I'm a fool for you anyway  
I'm a fool for you anyway  
'Cause I'm a fool for you anyway  
_

"I'm sorry I came over Eddie. I told you I wanted you to be happy and I do and what I'm doing right now is totally selfish, but, I miss you and I want to be with you and make love to you tonight." 

_Well I cried for you so long  
My river of tears ran dry  
And I tried to be so strong  
But grew weaker as time went by_

Eddie propped himself up on his elbows. He could only see her outline, she was wearing another sundress, her new favorite so it would seem, and her hair was pulled into a high ponytail on top of her head. She started to walk towards him, taking off her dress in the process. She stood at the foot of the bed wearing only her bra and underwear. When the hell had she gotten those? Lacey and pink? Or was it purple, damn, he couldn't see it was so dark. Before he could reach for the bedside lamp, she was over him, straddling him. Kissing him like she never had done before. She was bold and confident and sexy as hell. He was gently pushed back down as she took the lead. 

_  
You know your love left a mark on me  
I don't think it will fade away  
_  
_I'll sit here and wait 'til you come home  
'Cause I'm a fool for you anyway  
I'm a fool for you anyway  
Fool for you anyway  
_

"Janet…" Eddie croaked out, his throat had gone dry and he was at a loss for words. All common sense drained from his head and went straight into his lap. He was trying to push her away, but he didn't really want to, so instead he tried to say her name with the most force he could muster. "Janet!"

"Shhhhhhhhh. Just give me tonight Eddie, please. And then I won't bother you anymore. If that's what you want. I promise. I just need a better goodbye memory. I just want us both to have one more night where we can remember the good times. I love you, I want to make love to you. We never got to do that after saying the words. Not the way we should have. Just…" she kissed his chest, "give…" she kissed his shoulder, "me…." she kissed his neck, "tonight." Then she kissed him again, full on the mouth, darting her tongue in and out, licking his lips, moaning his name. He was powerless to stop her; she was in control and all he could do was try to hold on to this moment for as long as it lasted. 

_You know your love left a mark on me, on me  
I don't think it will fade away_

I'll sit here and wait 'til you come home  
'Cause I'm a fool for you anyway  
'Cause I'm a fool for you anyway  
I'm a fool for you anyway  


His arms came up around her and pulled her closer to him, and she sighed with pleasure, knowing he was giving in to her if only for tonight.

_  
Fool for you anyway  
Fool for you anyway  
'Cause I'm a fool for you anyway  
A fool for you anyway  
Fool for you anyway  
I'm a fool for you anyway_

They made love all night. Neither Janet nor Eddie held anything back from each other. Everything that was in their hearts came out that night. Janet knew a fulfillment that could never be described and Eddie was exactly where he wanted to be. 

As the morning light started to stream through the windows, Janet stirred. Eddie sighed, smiled in his sleep and held her closer. She wanted to stay, but figured that once he was awake, he'd regret it again. Not being able to handle that rejection after such a perfect night, Janet slowly eased her way out of the bed. Fishing around the room for her clothes, she was only able to find her dress and underwear. Her bra must be in the bed somewhere, but she dared not to disturb Eddie in fear of having to confront him. Slipping on her clothes, she started toward the door when it struck her that she was doing what Eddie had done to her when he walked out that night. Considering the consequences, Janet sat down on the floor in the corner of the room and decided to wait until he woke up. She was not going to be a coward today. She knew fully well that when Eddie woke up, he may not want her here, but she decided the risk was worth it, because, what if he did?


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Robert! Hurry up or the office is going to be closed by the time we get there!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming. Jees-o-pete!" Robert sounded irritated but he was smiling inside. Leslie was always the last one ready, but today, the day they were going to apply for their marriage license, she was ready before he had even gotten out of bed. Women!

"I just don't want to have to wait another day! And if we miss it today, then we won't get it until Monday and I don't think I can wait that long!" Leslie was positively giddy. Imagine that, at her age, still getting foolish over a man. Well, there you have it, she thought, still a young girl at heart.

Robert came down the stairs, buttoning the cuffs on his 'dressy' plaid shirt and walked right up behind her. Sliding his arms around her from behind, he embraced her in a calming manner. "I'm sorry I took so long sweetheart." He kissed her on the nape of her neck and continued, "Let's go do this."

Laughing at the tickling of his kisses, she turned in his arms and put hers around his neck. "I love you Robert. I can't believe I'm willing to go through this again, but damned if I don't love you more than life itself." She kissed him, gently on the lips and stroked his cheek with her knuckles. Whenever Robert was with Leslie, he felt, well, he felt like he was home.

………………………………………..

After sitting on the floor for a minute, trying to regroup, Janet quietly got up and walked over to the only chair in the room. As usual, it had a pile of clothes strewn over it. Carefully, she moved them to the floor (she was sure they were dirty anyway) and sat down. It was near the window and she oftentimes sat there in the mornings and read a book while she waited for Eddie to wake up. Today was different; they had made love several times last night and probably had some of the best sex ever. Janet still marveled at her confidence, she was beyond brazen, but Eddie didn't seem to mind, in fact she was sure it tuned him on. Janet always assumed you had to look a certain way or have a certain body in order to be seductress, but apparently she had been wrong. Deep in thought and self realization, she didn't notice that Eddie had woken up about a half hour later.

The first thing Eddie noticed was that Janet was gone. Panic ran through him at the thought that she left but when he glanced around and saw her in her usual spot; he smiled and just stared at her. She was looking out the window, apparently deep in thought. He wondered if she regretted last night. He paused for a second to gather his own thoughts, surprised that he didn't regret it at all. 

The sun was shining through the window brightly and he could make out the dress she was wearing so much better now. This one was navy blue with ruffles and short sleeves it was also, he noted, very fitted. She looked sexy, and confident, much as she had last night. He regretted she was already dressed since he hadn't really gotten a good look at the new underwear. Shifting a little in bed, he felt something poke him in the side. Curious, he reached his hand behind him and pulled up her bra. Eddie smiled… hot pink with yellow trim. Real nice. He wondered if he could convince her to wear it for him, just as he started to get a little uncomfortable from desire, she looked over and smiled. It was tentative, but it was still a smile. He realized he was so happy she had come to him last night, it seemed to be at a time when he was thinking of her and wishing she was there with him.

"Morning."

"Good Morning, Eddie. Er, uhm, how did you sleep?" She was shy again, not that bold siren who had walked through his room last night, stripping away her insecurities as she straddled him for sex. But it was okay, there was an occasion for that, and this morning was a different thing altogether, a different mood. Eddie was okay with that too as long as sex kitten Janet showed up every now and again; he'd be a happy man.

"Well, considering we hardly had time to sleep, I would say the little I had was good."

Janet blushed hard. Seeing Eddie had made her forget all of her self-doubts. "Sorry about that. Hey listen, about last night, I…. I know I said I didn't think there was a chance for us and that I didn't think…."

"Are you sorry about last night?" Eddie asked her incredulously.

"What? NO! I could never be sorry. Eddie, anytime with you is special and I cherish it. But, I made you a promise and I didn't keep it. I was supposed to stay away so you could be happy and get over us, but I missed you so much the longing was just too much for me to handle and I couldn't stay away, not for one second longer." Janet had rushed through this speech, hoping it didn't sound as lame to him as it did to her.

"Janet, I was happy to see you last night, I was missing you and all of a sudden, POOF, you were here. After the way we left things the last time, the way I treated you, I was so ashamed of myself. I'm really sorry for that."

"You're not half as sorry as I am for what I have put you through Eddie. I was going to leave this morning, I was so afraid in the light of day you wouldn't want me here, that all of your doubts about me would resurface." Janet just looked at him, searchingly.

"Not yet. I hope they don't either." And then, Eddie gave her his smile. It was the one he reserved just for her, and she could tell it came from deep down in his heart. He hadn't graced her with this smile since before the Rooster incident. And then,something amazing happened. He moved over in the bed and patted the empty side. Janet was trembling on the inside, but on the outside, she appeared confident as she stood. She walked over to the bed and climbed in. He pulled her down so her head rested on his chest. He started drawing lazy circles on her upper arm with his hand.

"You're slightly overdressed." He whispered in his husky voice. She shifted and without any hesitation, pulled the dress over her head. Surprised at her outright boldness, Eddie's excitement went straight down to his lap. She pulled her hair out of the ponytail and let it fall around her shoulders. It was a simple move, not meant to be sexy, but her innocence in doing it was sexy all the same. With her back to the window, it put a kind of glowing outline on her body and hair. And then, she was over him, slowly dipping her head to kiss him, gently on the lips. She was topless and only had on those thin lacy panties. They were low on her hips, but wide on the back, then, cut off at the cheek, they were very sexy and fit her so nicely. They matched the bra and Eddie groaned at the thought. 

"Is that a little better?" She kissed him on the forehead, then onto his neck and ear on the left side.

"Yeah, that's better, but, now, you're a little underdressed." Janet stopped kissing him and laughed a little in confusion.

"What? Eddie, what are you talking about?" Eddie took his hands and cupped her breasts and slowly started to massage them. Janet moaned in pleasure, seemingly lost in the moment.

"You see, last night, this siren came into my bed and she was wearing this bra and panty set I had never seen before, but it was dark so all I could see was the outline. I was hoping for a better look in the light of day. Will you put it on for me?"

"What't the point? I'm kinda hoping that you'd take off any of the clothes I'm wearing."

"All in good time." He brought his mouth up to her and tasted.

"Ohhhh, what? Anything you want Eddie." Eddie pulled the bra from under him and handed it to her. Because of this, he had to stop what he was doing with his hands and mouth and Janet was snapped back to reality. A little annoyed by the interruption of her pleasure, she made quick work of putting the bra on and gave him a little wiggle. _Oh God!_ _If she keeps moving like that, I'm going to embarrass myself and finish before we get started._

"Yeah, now that's what I'm talkin' about." Eddie looked at her long and hard. "God, you're beautiful Janet." He pulled her down to him and took from her.

……………………………………………

Janet left Eddie and Phil's place around 1 o'clock on Friday. She was working the evening shift and had just enough time to go home to shower and change for work. Earlier this morning, Eddie called Nick and told him he would be in half a day since there were no jobs and only paperwork to do. They spent the morning making love. They barely talked, and just savored their time together. It was like a dream, but soon reality starting breaking through. What did this mean? Were they back together? Had Eddie found a way to forgive her, truly and honestly? Janet pondered all these things on the short drive home. As she was walking in her door, her house phone started ringing. 

"Hello?"

"Hey, where the heck have you been? You weren't home last night when I called?"

"Hey Hannah. Yeah, sorry about that, I was out all night and just got home." Hannah squealed in excitement. 

"Oh MY GOD! Was it good? I mean, I am assuming you two slept together? I thought this was just a friendly thing… guess it turned into a maybe date? God Janet! It must have been hot, I mean Steve has a great body. Details, I want all the juicy details!"

"What? NO, Hannah! Oh God, wait a minute." Janet was laughing so hard she almost peed her pants. "Hannah you are out of control, you know that? I wasn't talking about Steve, I was with Eddie last night."

"Wait, WAIT, WHAT! How did you end up spending the night with Eddie if you went out with Steve?" Hannah was laughing now too as Janet starting telling her the events that lead up to her going over to Eddie's house. After telling her the details (not as juicy as Hannah would have liked), Janet fell silent.

"Janet, don't do that. I can already hear the wheels of self-doubt turning in your head. Eddie totally loves you, and you just have to give him some time to realize that you two can make it past this. Last night and this morning? It's a good sign. He was glad you were there and he said so. Be patient, okay?"

"The thing is Hannah, I know all that. That's not the reason I was quiet."

Taken by surprise, Hannah asked her, "Well then what has you in such deep thoughts?"

"Well, I am a bit surprised at myself, for the way I was so bold and uninhibited. I've never been that way before, but last night, something seemed to shift for me. It's like, I wanted Eddie, I mean I _wanted_ him and I needed him to know how much I did."

"I'd say you got your point across, several times." Hannah replied dryly.

"Yeah, I guess I did." Janet was smiling into the phone feeling freer than she had in months.

"And how did it feel, shedding all those inhibitions?"

"It felt fantastic."

"Well good for you Janet, it's about time."

…………………………………………

Eddie walked into Best Friend Windows at about 2 o'clock with a bounce in his step and whistling a tune. After Janet left, he laid in bed thinking about her, soaking in her scent and simply basking in the after glow of their lovemaking. She had wanted to stay, but he knew if she did, she'd be late for work, or miss her shift entirely. He was so pent up; he could have gone on for days with her. Nick looked up at a smiling Eddie. He hadn't seen him like this in months and it was nice to have him back. Nick got a call from Phil telling him what went on and he figured this might be the beginning of reconciliation.

"Hey buddy. What goes on?"

"Sorry I was so late Nicky, I had some… 'stuff' at home that needed catching up on." Eddie had a smirk on his face as he went through some paperwork on his desk.

"Stuff? Is that what we're calling it these days? Well, I'm envious of your 'stuff' since I haven't had any in over a month." Eddie swirled around with a shocked look on his face. 

"What? What are you talking about, what's going on with you and Aubrey?"

"Man, I wish like hell I knew. We haven't had sex in over a month, she's been emotionally distant and the other day she brings up the fact that Ronnie is in love with her."

"Whoa. Slow down Nicky. We all know that Ronnie has a little crush, but you don't think….?"

"Eddie, I don't know what to think anymore; and to be perfectly honest with you? This past month all I can seem to think about is the fact that Hannah is going to marry Big Cat and our chances of ever being together will be over."

"Nicky…. I thought you had given up on that a long time ago. I mean, you're with Aubrey and she's good for you."

"It doesn't seem to matter, I haven't had sex with my own girlfriend in over a month and don't seem to care. There's gotta be something wrong with that picture."

"True enough, but Hannah seems to be at peace now even if it is with that asshole."

"But if she knew the kind of guy that he really was, would her choices be so clear to her?"

"I hate to break it to you Nicky, but I think Hannah knows exactly the kind of guy he is, she's just choosing to be with him."

"No, I refuse to believe she knows everything there is to know about that slime."

"She knows enough and has still stayed. Let it be Nicky, they're getting married in three months. Just let it be. Maybe she isn't the one for you."

"The thing is Eddie? My mind is telling me that, but my heart? My heart is singing a different tune."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Matt Lausch sat in the local jail cell for over three months now. In less than a week, he was going to be transferred to the county prison until his trial in the fall. He had appealed to the lawyers Ray had hired and no one seemed to be able to get him out. It was looking really bad for him and he was getting desperate. He called Ray and threatened to tell the police everything, but Ray laughed at him. Ray had thought things through as well and decided there was no proof. Everything had been done with cash and there was no paper trail. Matt felt backed into a corner. His lawyer told him to sit tight, once they got to trial, he would probably get time served, but that was still three months away. It was one thing to sit in a local jail cell for months; it was an entirely different matter to go to a real prison with murderers and drug dealers. Matt immediately felt sick to his stomach. He started thinking about all the things he could do to get himself out but he came up short. At last, giving up all hope, he did the one thing that could at the very least screw Ray over. He made a phone call.

"This is the operator with a person to person call from Knights Ridge Police Department for Hannah Daniels, do you accept?"

Hannah was at a loss for who would be calling her collect from the police station, but to be safe, she accepted. "Yeah, sure. I accept."

"Hannah? Wait, don't hang up, it's Matt Lausch."

"What the hell do you want? If you're looking for Ray, he can't help you either, what you did to Eddie, is beyond inexcusable…" Hannah ranted on but Matt cut her off.

"WHAT I DID TO EDDIE?" Matt was breathing heavy and angrier than hell that everything seemed to have backfired on him. He took a deep breath and continued, "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell. And no, I wasn't calling to talk to Ray; I was calling to talk to you."

"Why on earth would you want to…"

"Get your damn head out of the clouds Hannah _Jane_, Ray put me up to it all…" And with that, Hannah sunk to the couch and listened to Matt recount stories from the past that had far different facts from the ones Ray had given her.

……………………………………………………

At around 6 o'clock, Nick and Eddie decided to meet up with Ikey and Owen at Sully's for dinner and drinks. It felt good for Eddie to go there, knowing him and Janet were on the mend. He wasn't sure how it happened, but he managed to forgive her. He was almost positive he wanted to give it another try and was going to run things by the guys to get their opinion. It was at times like these he really wished Phil left the house. No sooner did he and Nick walk through the door when he was accosted, that's the best way to describe it, by a petite blonde with big blue eyes and even bigger…

"Hey Eddie. What goes on?" Eddie was busy trying to pry her hands off his bicep; she had latched on like a leech. 

"Uh, hey. Do I know you?" He glanced around the room, hoping Janet wouldn't see this and get the wrong impression. Things were still a little raw and he didn't want to risk another misunderstanding.

"Not yet baby, but I'm hoping to get to know you real well. How about you buy me a drink?"

"That would be a HELL and a NO. Can you let go of my arm, I think I'm losing circulation. Besides this is pretty disrespectful, my girlfriend works here, so back off will ya?"

"You mean Janet?" The girl looked confused, Eddie tensed, ready to defend her but was thrown off guard by her next words, "But I thought she was dating Officer Steve now? I mean everyone saw them on a date last night! I'm sorry Eddie, I feel like an ass, I was just trying to be forward and get your attention. The rumor mill must have been wrong on that score, huh?"

Distracted now, Eddie simply nodded and mumbled, "Yeah, musta been." The red was glazing over his eyes faster than he could control it. Nick was speaking to him, pulling on his shoulder, but Eddie couldn't hear anything. The anger, the resentment, the pain all came rushing back. Remembering she was a woman, Eddie turned and punched the wall instead. Janet finally catching a glimpse of him from across the room, started to smile then it faltered when she realized he was upset about something. Not thinking that the anger could be directed at her, she rushed to him, thinking only of consoling him.

"Eddie? Is everything alright?" Janet went to put her arm on his shoulder and he jerked it away. Janet blinked in surprise and looked at Nick for some kind of clue as to what was going on.

Nick's voice broke through his haze, "Eddie, calm down, let's take this outside. I'm sure there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for all this. Come on Eddie, take a breath and walk with me outside. Janet, take a break and meet us out back, okay?" Propelling Eddie out the front door, they ran into Ikey and Owen, who followed them back out. Nick quickly brought them up to speed as they waited for Janet at the back door leaning against her Jeep.

"Eddie, you gotta calm down man. This thing with Janet has got you in a bad way." Ikey, Eddie thought, was the master of stating the obvious.

"Yeah man, I'm sure there is a good explanation for all of this, and even if she did go out with Steve, so what? You guys were broken up at the time, I mean, are you even back together now? Have you two talked about it?" Owen reasoned.

"No, we haven't, not yet." She said it so quietly, they almost didn't hear here. All four guys looked up at the sound of Janet's voice. She looked concerned, but not guilty.. Eddie had punched a wall because she had neglected to warn him about her "date" with Steve. She hoped he hadn't broken his hand. Twisting her own hands around each other, she began, "Eddie, I went out with Steve last night. He asked me out on a date a few days ago and then we both laughed, realizing we didn't want to date each other, we just wanted to commiserate on our love lives. We went out to that new Italian Place, over on third, as _friends_ last night. Then we went to his new place to see the layout and the work still left to be done. We talked about Trishia most of the night. He needed a friend and so did I. Nothing happened, and that was fine because neither one of us wanted anything to happen. After hanging out with him, he took me home and it made me realize I wanted to be with you. After talking to him, it was so clear that I had to fight for you, for us and that is why I came to you last night. Nothing else happened. It was the only time since we broke things off that I went out with another man. And I don't even count that as a date."

"Why didn't you say anything earlier? You let me find out like this?"

"I'm so sorry baby. " She walked toward him and the guys looked a little uncomfortable, witnessing this intimacy. Janet pretended like her and Eddie were the only ones there and continued, "It wasn't my intention not to tell you Eddie, we barely talked, remember? We made love over and over again; we weren't exactly in heavy conversation mode. And it slipped my mind, once I saw you, everything else faded away, as it always seems to when I'm with you." Janet was touching his face now, putting her arms around him and tried coaxing him into holding her back, holding her breath, she waited for his acceptance.

"Janet, that's the kind of thing we can't let…" She decided he needed even more reassurance, so she pulled on his neck with her hand to bring him down to her and kissed him.

"I know, I'm sorry." Janet was feathering kisses on his face, holding it with her two hands. The guys mumbled something about leaving them alone and walked back around to the front and into Sully's. Finally, Eddie relented and put his arms around her.

"You promise me that's all that happened?" By now Janet was massaging his hand. Bending his fingers, making cure nothing was broken. 

"Yes, Eddie, I promise. I may have made horrible mistakes in the past, but I have never, ever lied to you about them. I would never lie to you, ever. I love you too much."

Eddie rested his forehead to hers and whispered back huskily, "I love you too."

……………………………………..

Phil was alone in the house and would be for at least a couple more hours. Judging by the sounds coming from Eddie's room last night and this morning, him and Janet were well on their way to reconciling. Eddie was a changed man, a man in love and if truth be told, he was probably going to, at the very least, be living with Janet if not marrying her really soon. He had known Eddie well over 20 years and he could read the writing on the wall. For far too long he had been complacent about his problems and too dependent on Eddie. Now Phil had a wonderful woman, who loved him despite his shortcomings, and he was still stuck in this house. Well today, Phil decided to do something about it. 

He called up the therapist who had tried to help him years ago, she was still around, still willing to make house calls and he was confident she could still help him. All he needed to do was ask. So he was sitting in the living room, waiting for the rest of his life to begin. He heard the doorbell ring and as he walked towards the front door, he could feel new life starting to surge through him and it felt good.

………………………………….

"Hannah slow down, what?" Janet could barely hear Hannah through all the background noise at Sully's and in between her sobs in the cell phone. Her heart twisted because it was Friday night and unless someone had died, Sully wouldn't let her leave her shift halfway through. "Hannah, calm down. I'm gonna send the guys over right now, okay? What? No, she's working tonight, don't worry, the guys will be there shortly." As she was hanging up with Hannah, she was flagging Nick and Eddie down. Relaying what she heard from her side of the phone, Eddie and Nick just nodded, threw some bills on the table and left to go check on Hannah. Eddie promised to call her once he found out what was wrong. All Janet could do now was wait.

Owen and Ikey decided to stay, figuring if there was something really bad going on, she would have called the police instead of Janet. They settled back into their booth and continued eating dinner. 

"So what goes on with you and Darcy?" Owen was on his second helping of wings and probably his third draft.

"I don't know, it's still kinda new, but I dig her, you know? I mean she's into sports and jeans and flannel. It's like she's a dude with boobs. It's mad crazy."

"Yeah, I noticed that about her, I mean she cleans up real good, but she's definitely a casual girl, understated hotness. So, you kiss her yet? Sleep with her?" Owen was smiling; it was nice that Ikey was into a woman, ANY woman besides Allison. He knew his friend and assumed he must have been in love with her, even though she wasn't in love with him. Despite himself, he felt bad for Ikey and wished him happiness, with someone else, of course.

"Nah, she's a good girl, you know, taking it slow. After being notched on Eddie's belt, she seems even more cautious. But that's okay, I'm enjoying getting to know her first."

Owen looked over at his friend. He knew how Eddie felt all too well, It had not been easy forgiving Ikey or his wife for what they had done, but it got easier each day. Allison and him were trying to work things out, going to counseling. Ironically (and maybe because he had known Ikey longer) he found it easier to forgive Ikey. "Well, I hope everything works out with you two. When you seeing her again?"

"Tomorrow. We're going out to dinner and a movie."

"That's great man, what's that, like three times this week?"

"Yeah, like I said, I'm really enjoying getting to know her."


	11. Chapter 11

_(Author's note: I've always threatened to write myself into the script! Can you guess who I am??)_

**Chapter 11**

Janet walked over to Owen and Ikey's table. She was nervous because things were a little strained between her and Eddie's friends, understandably.

"Need anything else guys? Refills? Coffee? More to eat?"

"Nah Janet, I'm good." Ikey was stretched out on the booth, rubbing his belly like a satisfied man.

Owen considered her a moment. He had not meddled in Eddie's affairs in the past, but he was worried for his friend. He had to ask her a few things to get the worry off his mind. "It was a one time thing, right Janet?" Owen asked her quietly so no one else could overhear.

Taken aback, but not daunted by his directness Janet answered as matter of fact as she could. "Yeah Owen, a one time never-gonna-happen again; type of a misunderstanding."

"He loves you, you know." Owen said this almost accusingly.

"And I love him too, more than anything."

"Please don't hurt him again Janet, he's a good guy. He deserves… he deserves better than that."

"I agree Owen. And he's really lucky to have such great friends that have his back like you do."

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry; I just want him to be happy, you know? I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable."

"It's okay; it's all good, really." Janet turned to walk away but Owen called to her again. Shoulders slumping, she turned with a fake smile plastered on her face, ready to take her lumps.

"Oh, and Janet, one more thing? I hear you girls go out for like a girl's night every now and again…Allison could really use some friends. You know, I never realized how lonely she gets and all." He paused and glared at Ikey, shaking away the anger he continued, "Do you think you all could…"

Janet immediately brightened. "Of course! Say no more! We'll make sure to invite her the next time we go out. And I'll make it a habit to call her every now and again to see if she has time for coffee or chit-chat."

"Thanks Janet, I'm sure she would love that. She comes off as confident and everything, but she's really just shy."

"Don't worry at all Owen, I'll make sure we bring Allison into the group, even if Eddie and I don't make it together. Okay?"

"Okay, but I don't see that happening." Owen was grinning at her now. It was really true. Janet had no idea the power she had over Eddie.

"I don't know Owen, I think that's up to Eddie to decide." And with that, Janet walked off to check her cell phone hoping to hear from Eddie or Nick about Hannah's status.

* * *

Leslie sat on the couch wringing her hands. She was deep in thought and clearly worried about something when Robert walked in the room with the tub of popcorn (extra butter). They were planning on an evening in; a movie, some popcorn and if he wasn't totally exhausted some much needed lovemaking. He either hadn't been in the mood as of late or was just plain tired; an unfortunate side effect of the chemo. But it had been a full week now since his chemo had ended and he was starting to feel up to certain extracurricular activities again. He whistled as he walked up to her.

"Snipity-loo darling! What's on your mind?" Leslie was so deep in thought; she hadn't noticed when Robert came back in the room.

"What? Oh! I didn't hear you! Uhm, nothing really. I just spoke to Emily, that's all."

"Ooookaaaay. Is something wrong? Is she okay?" Emily was Leslie's only child. She lived in Chicago and was in advertising or something of the sort. He hadn't met her yet, but talked to her numerous times on the phone. She seemed to be a sweetheart, but maybe she wasn't thrilled to hear about their upcoming nuptials? "You finally told her about us getting married, didn't you?"

"Uh-huh."

"And she was upset?"

"Uh-uh."

"So, what's the problem?"

"She _wasn't_ upset. I didn't expect that. You know, she held her father up so high and well, I thought she would be mad or something. But instead, she said she would be flying out in two weeks and staying for a month until the wedding."

"A whole month? What about her job? Why would she…?"

"I have no idea Robert. I'm just as confused by this as you. Apparently she can work from anywhere. So, just like that, hurricane Emily will be coming to the Ridge and I fear it will never be the same."

* * *

Nick and Eddie reached Hannah's place in record time. Eddie went purely for Janet's sake. He was through with Hannah and her lies; she put the final nail in her coffin when she decided to stay engaged to Ray despite him possibly being involved with Eddie's assault. Nick however, still holding a torch, would forever be cursed with the instinct to run to Hannah if there was even a hint of her being in need.

Nick took the stairs two at a time. He was banging on the door before Eddie managed to get out of the truck. Hannah opened the door, obviously having just finished crying.

"Hannah? What goes on?" Nick was enfolding her into his arms at the same time he was talking. Eddie glanced around to make sure Ray wasn't in sight. Eddie cleared his throat.

"Ahem. Hannah, can we come inside? Don't want the neighbors to have anything to talk about; seeing as you're not exactly engaged to Nicky here." Abruptly, the two wanna-be lovers pulled apart from each other and headed inside.

"What goes on Hannah? Are you hurt? Where's Sam?" Nick was looking her over, soaking her in. When he was apart from her he somehow managed to put her out of his mind and focus on whatever was in front of him, be it work, his dad's condition or Aubrey. But when he was with her, she dominated his thoughts and her scent always drove him wild. It lingered on his clothes and he knew he might just be sniffing his sleeves before the day was over. Pathetic. She was marrying another man, why did he continue to torture himself?

"Sam is over at Doodie's house for dinner. Ray… Ray had to go to Boston for a few days, something to do with the business." Hannah paused and to Eddie's surprise, she was looking him straight in the eye. "I'm so sorry Eddie. I am so sorry about everything Ray has put you through. Your landscaping business, the fight he picked through Matt at the store… the attack on you. I'm really just so sorry about all of it. You seemed to have suffered more even though he was gunning for Nick, really."

"Hannah, look, it's done. You made your choices and I can't say that it all turned out bad. I mean, Nick and I started the business as a result…. wait, why are you talking as if you are so sure about everything now? Did Ray admit to being behind it all?"

"No, but I got a call today…" Hannah relayed all that happened with the phone call earlier from Matt. She was so glad that Ray was out of town, it would give her time to think things through and make some decisions. The fact of the matter is, she as in love with Ray, but for him to be capable of such things? It made her heart break and also made her just a little bit afraid for her safety. She sent Sam over to Doodie's house and called Janet so she could talk things out with her. Unfortunately, Janet had sent Eddie, the person who had suffered the most at the hands of Ray's schemes.

Eddie was pissed. Here she was crying over this guy, Nick was fawning over her like a love-sick puppy and HE was the one who had lost his business and damn near his life. Shaking his head in disgust, he paced the room for a minute and then abruptly turned to leave.

"Eddie, wait!" Hannah got up from the couch and was in front of him before he could turn the knob on the front door. "I'm so sorry Eddie, if I had known…"

"Oh, you knew Hannah! You knew what an asshole Big Cat could be! You knew that he was behind all this stuff. And when he ruined my business, my livelihood for no good damn reason, you just sat there and let him. Did you even get mad at him, tell him it was wrong? Ha! I doubt it. You know what Hannah, we all know what Big Cat was like back in the day and we have all managed to remember that, how the hell did you forget?" Not even waiting for an answer, he gently nudged her out of the way and walked out the door. Stalking over to his truck, he started it up and skidded off in the direction of Sully's.

* * *

Janet had gotten a cold draft into Eddie's hand as soon as she saw his face. He was angry and muttering to himself. The fact that he had been right about Big Cat was no consolation to him. Hannah's obliviousness to the whole thing seemed to piss him off more. Janet was finally able to soothe him and cool him down enough to relay what had happened at Hannah's. Ikey and Owen had left and the place was starting to empty out. She sat on the stool next to him and put her arms around his neck. She hesitated for a minute, not sure if he'd welcome the public affection, but he was still so angry that she just wanted to make him feel better and she hoped a hug would. She felt him relax and slump a little as if he handed over the weight of his world.

Running her hands through his hair soothingly, she said, "Don't be too upset Eddie, like you told Hannah, you did end up with Best Friend Windows and that's a big deal. You're happy there and it was a dream come true for you."

"I know, but I'm still creased about it. I mean, even with me finding this out, it's not going to do anything. Ray will still get away with everything. No one will know what he's really like and he will forever be the poster child for upstanding businessmen in the Ridge." Janet looked at him and understood. Eddie had never been able to live down his lothario reputation, despite being with her for months. And then, on top of it, she hadn't believed in him enough and well…But Ray, the biggest creep known to man, was able to hide his true colors from the people that mattered most.

"It's okay Eddie. If it's any consolation, the people who matter most to you, know what a wonderful person you are. And Ray doesn't need to be a part of our life. Hopefully Hannah will finally end this sham of an engagement."

Eddie shook his head. "Ha! I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you. Somehow, I don't think it's going to be that easy for her. She was crying over the idiot like he deserved her tears."

"Well, she's been with him for a long time." Janet reasoned. "And despite how he treats everyone else, he has always treated Hannah and Sam well. She loves him, in spite of his actions; she loves him, honestly and truly. It's hard to just turn that off." She smiled at him, gratefully.

Eddie considered her last statement. In spite of Janet's actions, he loved her too. Damn! Janet always had a way of making him see clearly even in the most difficult of situations. "You think you're pretty smart don't ya?" He gave her that crooked grin that was pure mischief.

"So you say." Janet smiled with a twinkle in her eye. Eddie twisted around so he was facing her and pulled her towards him for a kiss. They were at Sully's and people would see. He was taking what was his again and stating it to the world. There was no hesitation and no doubt. His tongue attacked her mouth with desire and need. She gave him what he wanted; she could tell he was staking his claim. She tilted her head back and sighed as he once again made her feel like the most important person in his world.


	12. Chapter 12

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* * *

**

Chapter 12

"Thanks for meeting me Ronnie. I know it's been a while since we last saw each other and I'm so sorry for that." Aubrey had genuinely missed Ronnie. Every time she came over to the house, he was either gone or on his way out the door. She heard from Nick that he was dating and the green-eyed monster reared up so quickly she was barely able to contain it. She had no rights to Ronnie after all; she had broken her promise to end things with Nick and had gotten exactly what she deserved. But still, despite it all, she couldn't get him off her mind and decided that she was ready to face the music if it meant they could be together.

"Yeah well, I have never been able to turn away from a woman crying. What do you want Aubrey?" Aubrey winced at his abrupt tone. It hurt Ronnie like hell to be this mean to her. But it was the only way he could push past the pain of never actually being with her again. Knowing she would never be his to hold and to kiss, to love and cherish, it was all too much. He came out fighting like an animal backed into a corner; it was purely a survival instinct.

"Oh…I'm sorry. I…I… wanted to know if…" Aubrey wanted to choose her words carefully. She missed him and realized that after he was not in her life anymore the pain was too much. She was falling in love with Ronnie, unfortunately it took her hurting him and being apart from him to even realize it. "I mean, if it's not too late. Could we, maybe try again?" She looked at him and saw only a brick wall. He had no emotion whatsoever on his face. She had never known Ronnie to be so cold.

"I can't Aubrey. I can't go back to the way things were. It's wrong. You're with Nick and you made it perfectly clear that is where you want to stay." Mentally giving himself a pat on the back for his strength he turned to leave her apartment, but stopped when she started speaking again.

"I don't want things to be the way they were either. I want to tell Nick, together. I want to be with you Ronnie, always." Ronnie dared to hope, pausing midway towards the door; he still had his back to her. "I think I'm falling in love with you Ronnie." Shock ran through his body. Had he heard her right? Could he just be hearing what he so badly wanted to hear?

"Wha-what did you say?"

"I said I think I'm falling in love with you." Ronnie still couldn't turn to face her. Worried that it was too late, Aubrey rushed to him. Tears glistening in the corners of his eyes, relief washed over his face. He grabbed her and hugged her till it hurt. She gasped in surprise, it was so tight and she knew this time neither one of them were going to let go.

"I can't do this again Aubrey, I don't think I'll survive it if you don't follow through this time. Do you understand? I love you, I need you, please tell me this is for real this time."

Aubrey gave him a smile that could light a thousand cities. "It's for real Ronnie, it's for real. I think we should tell him in the morning, the sooner the better, okay? Will you, be here with me?"

"I'm not going anywhere, not anymore" He kissed her gently on the lips, and turned to leave.

"Ronnie, wait! Where are you going?"

"I'm going home Aubrey. I told you, I won't do this, not again. We can be together soon enough, just not like this. Can you understand?" Aubrey was burning with need but she understood Ronnie's stance. "It's not easy for me to walk away from you either. But, I have to, just for tonight."

"I understand Ronnie. See you in the morning? Say around 10?"

"Yeah, I'll be here. I promise." With that, Ronnie walked out the door, leaving Aubrey alone with her thoughts. She knew Nick would be angry, but at the same time, she wasn't sure he would really care that it was over. It had been over a month since they were together physically and he didn't seem to give a damn. She wanted to be with someone who did, and Ronnie made her feel like the center of the world. She was happy and smiling and things with Ronnie were so easy. So even though she was alone with her thoughts, they didn't give way to doubt and despair, they gave her a sense of hope and excitement. And that was something she hadn't felt with Nick in a very long time.

* * *

Janet and Eddie decided to go back to his place. Eddie wasn't ready to face sleeping in the same bed Rooster had bedded his woman, so they silently agreed to go get some tuff and had back over to 32 Gelsen. After making love before falling asleep, Janet wondered if she should ask whether or not they were officially back together. It sure felt like it; to his friends and to her, but she needed to hear it from him. Unfortunately, she was a coward and decided to wait a while before broaching the subject. She was back in Eddie's arm and back in his bed, and honestly, that was all that mattered to her at this moment.

It was early Saturday morning and Janet just lay there with her eyes closed and a smile on her face. She was still naked from their lovemaking when they first went to bed. All of a sudden, she felt Eddie shift and in a swift move, he was on top of her nudging her legs open with his knees. Janet's eyes shot open in surprise. Eddie was halfway inside of her before she even realized what was going on.

"Eddie!"

"Morning," He was smiling and sliding inside of her. Despite not having any warning her body was ready for him. "I thought I would show you the best way to wake up."

"Oh…my…. God…" Janet let go with a sigh and decided to go with the flow. She closed her eyes and smiled with pleasure. They moved together in rhythm with one another. She was so close to coming when she heard Eddie's raspy voice.

"Look at me Janet. Open your eyes baby and look at me" Eddie needed that connection, and wanted her to feel it too. Her eyes opened slowly and saw into his soul. They climaxed together right as their eyes locked and their souls mated.

* * *

Nick woke up in a bad mood. He had talked with Hannah for half the night, trying to get her to see reason. By the time he was ready to leave, she was already half-way towards forgiving Ray and going through with the wedding. Nick couldn't understand her unwavering loyalty to the guy, but he tried to convince himself it wasn't his problem. Now it was almost 10 am and he needed to go see Aubrey. She said they needed to talk and he assumed the break-up speech was about to happen. His heart hadn't been in the relationship for months now and he assumed hers was catching on. Shrugging his shoulders, he threw on some clothes and headed down the stairs.

The Commander and Leslie were sitting in the living room, still in their robes. They were giggling and affectionate and it was freaking him out. Making a bee-line towards the kitchen before they saw him, he tried to block out their conversation but couldn't help but hear snippets none-the less.

"You were insatiable last night Robert." His dad said something that he couldn't quite hear and then he heard Leslie's laughter carry all the way through the kitchen.

"I hope you're up for another round tonight because…" Nick couldn't take it anymore; he cleared his throat to let them know he was in the next room. Leslie's voice dropped and he couldn't make out the rest of her sentence. Thank the sweet baby-Jesus. He knew they did it, but he didn't want to _know_ that they did it.

"Hey Nicky? That you son?" Robert called out from the living room.

"Morning Dad, Leslie." Nick walked out of the kitchen, came over to the couch and gave her a kiss good morning. She patted his cheek as had become her habit. "How goes the wedding plans?"

"Oh, they're coming along just fine. It's going to be small so it isn't much of a hassle. Oh! My daughter Emily's coming to town in a few weeks. I'm gonna want you to show her around and introduce her to your friends. She can be a wild one though… fair warning." Leslie was all smiles and had a teasing glint in her eye.

"Why is she coming so early?" A look passed between the Commander and Leslie that he didn't quite understand.

"We're not sure, but she's going to be around for a month so, I'm sure she'll appreciate hanging out with you young people."

"Anything you need Leslie. Well, I gotta run, I'm supposed to be at Aubrey's by 10:15 so…"

"See ya later son." As Nick walked out the door, he saw Leslie and his dad getting up from the couch. He watched in awe as Leslie walked fast to the stairs and his dad swatted her playfully on the behind. She let out a scream and ran up the stairs, his dad taking two steps at a time behind her. Shaking his head in wonder, he left, dumbfounded at how his dad was getting more action than him these days.

* * *

Janet walked downstairs after her shower. Eddie had just gotten in and she knew he would be a while. She was already dressed for her day at work. She had opted for Capri pants and a sleeveless button down shirt for work in deference to the heat. Sully never had AC put in the place and the ceiling fans were a poor substitute, especially for July. When she headed into the kitchen looking for coffee, she ran into Phil.

"Hey Janet, good to see you."

"Good morning Phil. How's it going?"

"Going well. You back for good?"

"I hope so, but that's up to Eddie to decide, you know?" Phil cocked his head to the side, surprised by her answer.

"You know Janet, Eddie's my friend. Hell, he's like a brother, but I would imagine the decision rests with both of you. I mean, that's what a relationship is, right? A partnership?"

"Well, sure, but I lost that right when I did what I did." Janet was looking down, not quite feeling so cheerful and full of life anymore.

"Janet, you made a mistake. Granted it was huge, but it was a mistake. I hope you don't think that because of that mistake you deserve anything less from Eddie or any man for that matter."

"I know that Phil, it's just, it was a pretty big mistake, you know? And I don't think I deserve to be screwed around with or anything, but I am willing to wait for Eddie to sort things out in his time frame. And if that means in the end that it can't work for him, as long as he tried to make it work, that's all I can really ask, you know?"

"True enough." Phil paused, not sure if he should continue. "You know Janet, you are a lot stronger than I thought you were. You're going to be just fine. I hope you and Eddie can grow from this and be stronger for it." She smiled, used to the assumption that her insecurities equated a weakness of some sort.

"Thanks Phil."

"Anytime. I gotta get dressed, I'm expecting someone in an hour and I still haven't showered. Is Eddie still in there?" Surprised that he was expecting someone, Janet took more than a few seconds to respond. Catching on, Phil simply stated. "My therapist."

"Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel like you had to answer to me or anything, it's just that…"

"I'm a shut-in and I don't get many visitors?"

Janet laughed a little at that and responded. "Well, yeah… there is that. Soooooo, why are you…?" She let the question hang.

"You know, it's about this." He gestured around the house. "I gotta get out of here Janet, and I really hope she can help me do that. I took a few steps last year and then I clutched. I am hoping she will help me work through that. I want to be able to take Pizza Girl out on a real date, and experience life again. Not just for her, but for me as well."

Janet went over to Phil and gave him a big hug. "I'm sure you will Phil. You're going to be just fine."

"Thanks Janet, so will you." He kissed her on the forehead and left the kitchen, whistling a tune on his way up the stairs.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

It was late July and the summer haze was blanketing the small town. Emily pulled her car over to the side of the road, right in front of the sign that read "Welcome to Knights Ridge". She stood at her car door and looked down the tree-lined street taking in the beauty of October Road. In the distance she heard birds chirping signaling the start of a new day. There weren't any cars on the road, but then it was barely 7 in the morning on a Saturday. She had left her hotel room in Pennsylvania in the middle of the night, preferring a night drive to the daytime traffic. She loved driving, always had. Give her the option to fly or drive, she would always take the extra time and make it a road trip. Her mother worried about her driving at night, but then, that's what mother's were supposed to do. Taking a deep breath of the fresh air, she got back in her car, turned off the ac and rolled down the windows. She drove down October Road, excited to finally meet the man and his family that had stolen her mother's heart.

* * *

It had been two weeks since Nick and Aubrey broke up. It wasn't a particularly bad break-up, in fact, it might have gone down as the most amicable break-up in history had it not been for the fact that Ronnie was also involved. Nick wasn't an irrational man, he knew in his heart of hearts that Aubrey wasn't for him. In fact, he also had a good feeling about Aubrey and Ronnie. What he didn't feel so good about was the fact that they decided to explore their feelings for each other _before_ finding out how Nick felt about it. It was a hard betrayal to swallow, but he had to. The Commander sat them down that very night and had a long talk about life being too short to hang onto anger and so on and so forth. He got through to Nick, as his dad always seemed to be able to. But Nick was still sore. He suspected that out of respect for him, Aubrey and Ronnie were hanging out mostly at her place and he was okay with that too. It was still a little weird and he would need time to adjust to the fact that his ex-girlfriend was banging his baby-brother in the room next door. Even worse, Hannah had yet to call off her wedding to Ray. He hadn't asked her directly, but Janet said, much to her disgust that it was still on. Janet had told Hannah in no uncertain terms that she couldn't stand up in the wedding, not after knowing for sure that Ray was responsible for Eddie's attack. This was a hard blow for Hannah. It seemed all of her friends were distancing themselves for her and Ray, leaving Hannah feeling more pushed into a corner. Nick contemplated going over and talking to her again, lending support, promising her that he would be there for her if she decided to walk away from Ray, but he reminded himself that it wasn't his place. Disgusted, Nick got out of his bed and threw on some pajama pants. Glancing at the clock, he knew it was okay to walk around shirtless since Leslie wouldn't be up for at least another couple of hours. His dad had already had the talk with him and Ronnie about walking around half-naked in front of their soon to be step-mom.

He was in the kitchen making coffee when he heard a car door slam outside. Curious about who could be out and about this early, he looked out the window. He smiled as he saw a short curvy woman with long black braids struggling with four suitcases and bags up the walkway to the house. He went to the front door and pulled it open. With her arms full of bags, head down in concentration, she was balancing on ridiculous high-heeled sandals and he could see a bright splash of red from her low-cut tank-top. Despite her load, she had that walk of a woman who knew she was sexy. Her hips swayed from side to side like a metronome and everything on her jiggled with the right amount of suggestiveness. Leslie was right about her daughter. Oh yeah, things were about to get really interesting in the Ridge.

"Morning." Nick leaned against the doorjamb. "You know, it would have been easier if you made a few trips."

She stopped and looked up at Nick. It was the first time he could see her face and he immediately felt… sunshine. She was grinning from ear to ear and answered him saucily.

"Well, actually, it would have been easier if you hauled your ass out of the house and carried them in for me… Big Brother!"

Nick laughed. He should have been offended, or at the very least taken aback. But he had spoken to Emily on the phone a few times and knew what to expect. She said whatever was on her mind and she usually did it with a dry sense of humor. He ran to her aide and quickly grabbed the biggest suitcase. It immediately dropped to the floor since he wasn't prepared for the weight.

"Jesus! What have you got in here?"

She was laughing at him as she said, "Well, I _am_ going to be here a month. You didn't think I'd pack light, did you?" Pushing past him she went into the house, leaving him to struggle with the overweight bag in her wake.

* * *

"I don't understand, how did this happen?" Allison visibly tensed. Sensing her anxiety, Owen relaxed and said more calmly, "Not that I'm not happy, but I thought you were on the pill?"

"I was Owen, but when we separated, I stopped taking them. You know I always hated the way they made me feel and I was never comfortable with taking those hormones anyway so…I stopped. It wasn't like I was active, you know?"

"But when we started counseling? I mean, didn't you think to go back on?"

"Quite frankly? Not really. I didn't. We were making progress, but it was slow going, I just never really thought about it. I mean, I didn't think we'd end up in bed together so quickly again." About three weeks ago, Owen and Allison had gone out on a date. Their therapist thought it might be nice to go away for a weekend and have some time alone together away from the kids. They had gotten her parents to come up from Boston and they went to stay at her parents place. They saw and play and went to dinner and had a great time. Later in the evening as they were saying their good nights, Owen kissed her, not being able to resist how beautiful she looked that evening. One thing led to another and they ended up rolling around right on the hallway floor in her parent's home. It was the best sex they had ever had.

Allison was hanging her head and wringing her hands. She wished she could go throw a load of laundry in, that always eased her anxiety for some reason. She was so worried about how Owen would react to the news. She knew a day after her period was late that she was probably pregnant. All he had to do was look at her sideways when she was off that damn pill and BAM, she was pregnant! That was her, fertile Myrtle. What a mess. Owen was probably going to think she had done it on purpose. To her surprise, he lifted her chin up with his hand and looked at her. The love that shone out of his eyes was unmistakable. She immediately felt tears well up in her eyes.

"Hey, hey… don't do that."

"I'm sorry. It's just that we were just starting to get back on track and I was thinking of asking you to move back into the bedroom with me and now this happens and I'm afraid what you must think of me. I didn't do it on purpose Owen, I swear!" She was fully sobbing now, and Owen just pulled her to him in his big bear embrace. She always felt so safe in his arms and kicked herself for the hundredth time for hurting him like she did.

"Shhhhhhhhhhhh. It's okay cranberry. I love you, you know that. And I'll love with new baby too. It's time that we move on past this Allison. I'm ready to give myself back to you 100 percent. I'm here, okay? And I'm not going anywhere again." He ran his hands down her back and slowly caressed her until he could feel her relax into his embrace. For the first time in a long time, he felt like she was all his again. He wasn't sharing her with Ikey, she was all his. Maybe it was the new life they created, he wasn't sure, but he knew one thing. It felt good to be back home, with her in his arms, where she belonged.

* * *

Janet rolled over and groaned. For over two weeks straight she had been sleeping at Eddie's place. Not that she didn't love being back with him, but her bed was so much more comfortable than his and her place sure smelled better. They had been doing a two step around the subject of spending time at her place. She knew it held bad memories for him, knowing that Rooster had been there, but this was getting ridiculous. She assumed they were back together, committed, but he never said as much. She felt at times that he was holding back from her, that he needed something from her that she wasn't giving, but she was at a loss as to what it was. It seemed every time she brought up wanting to talk; he diverted her attention (quite deliciously) by seducing her. Sighing in frustration she was resolved with the fact that they would have to step outside their "happy bubble" and talk about some serious issues.

Eddie mistook hr sigh for desire. He put his arms around her and dragged her closer to him. Nuzzling her neck, and planting feather kisses down her back he let his hands roam over her curvy body.

Janet slumped a little mentally. Goodness knows the man was insatiable. She was so sore down there she wasn't sure she was up to the challenge, but she had a hard time turning Eddie away. As he started working his way down, his fingers found her and she gasped, but it wasn't in pleasure, it was in discomfort. Eddie immediately stopped. He sensed her distress immediately and pulled away.

"Hey? Are you okay?" He turned her body to face him; concern was etched all over his face.

Smiling at him she replied, "I'm fine, just really sore. I don't think we've gone a day without making love at least twice and quite frankly I think I could use a long soak in the tub." Chagrined, he jumped up from bed, still aroused but focused only on her comfort.

"I'll go run the bath for you. I'm so sorry Janet. It's just that I missed you so much and well, I was pretty pent up. Still am in fact." He glanced downward and she just bit her lip. She really didn't want to turn him down, but she was afraid that she would die from pain if he came anywhere near her. He pulled on his boxers and started to leave the room for the bathroom. Before he could head out the door, Janet got out of bed herself.

"Wait Eddie. It's okay. I'm gonna just head home. All my stuff is there for my bath anyway, you know my soaking stuff and I haven't been home in a while. Wanna come with me?" Hopefully, she looked at him.

"Uh, nah, I think I'll hang out here for a while, but maybe we can have lunch before you have to go in, okay? And of course I'll pick you up form work tonight."

"And bring me back here Eddie?"

"Of course where else would I…."

"No. I can't Eddie. I want to spend the night at home, in my bed. Won't you come with me?" He waited a beat before he answered. Janet's shoulders sagged. She already knew the answer.

"Janet… I…I can't. I'm sorry, honestly. I just can't."

"Eddie, this is ridiculous, how many other women have you had sex with in that bed aside from me?"

"That's different and you know it!"

"Really, how so?" She spit out at him sarcastically.

"BECAUSE I WASN'T WITH YOU AT THE FUCKING TIME!" As soon as he said it, he immediately regretted it. He had been so careful these past few weeks, trying to tread around the subject and it just wouldn't go away. She had to bring it up. Damn, would he ever be able to get past this?

Janet looked as if she had been sucker punched. Taking a moment to gather her patience she spoke softly to him. "I see. Well Eddie, I can't argue with you there."

"Janet, hey look, I'm sorry. It's just that I can't sleep there, in that bed, knowing you and him…it's too much. I'm a sexist pig, sue me. But you're my woman and knowing that some self serving chicken hawk came into your house and took what was mine, well… I can't seem to get past that part. I love you Janet, and I want to be with you, I just can't do that at your place. Can you understand that?"

She took it all in and made some mental decisions. He wants to be with me and he loves me, but he won't make that step back into my home. Okay. "Yeah Eddie. I understand. I think.." Janet started bending down and gathering her clothes, "that we need some time to think about this. Really think about where this is going. You say you forgive me, but you really don't. I think your little outburst just now proved that. I think we should just take a step back and think on this some more." She had managed to get dressed while talking to him and walked to his bedroom door. "I'll be in touch Eddie." And then, she was gone.

* * *

_Author's note: Don't worry about Emily, think of her as a muse._


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

_Okay, okay, okay. Just breathe Janet. Just breathe. It's all going to be fine. This was two weeks coming. It was bound to come out in one way or another. Just breathe, you did the right thing. You did the right thing. You did the right thing._

Janet walked to her Jeep, got in and headed home. Once she pulled into her driveway she sat in her car and laid her head on the steering wheel. The thing was, she could see Eddie's side to it. She understood him not wanting to face that bedroom. Maybe she should have told him she didn't sleep there for almost two months either. She stayed in her guest room. But she eventually realized that changing location didn't change the act itself, it just had her running from what she did. So, she went back to her room and tried to reclaim.

_Maybe I should have been more understanding, bend more. Was she being unreasonable? It's not like she could move, could she? She could just spend all her time at Eddie's place, never have a place of her own? Did that make sense?_

She got out of the car and went into her place. Walking around she tried to see the place through Eddie's eyes. She looked at her couch and smiled. How many times had they made love right there? She walked to the kitchen and remembered the first time he tried making her breakfast in bed and burned everything. Walking to the bedroom, she remembered so many times they were together, talking or making love; showering together in that bathroom, sharing a towel afterwards. They had shared so many good memories in this room, how could he throw them all away? But then, all of a sudden images of Rooster pawing at her clothes came crashing around her; wet kisses and the stench of cheap grain alcohol. Rooster pushing her against her dresser, Rooster naked on her bed, tangled in her sheets, on top of her, her head turned away from the sight of him, eyes closed tightly wishing he were Eddie. She felt the bile building up in her throat and ran to the toilet to release it.

_I guess that's how Eddie feels every time he thinks about coming in here. Damn, he was right. But what do I do about it?_

Janet realized that unfortunately her home would always cast a shadow over her relationship with Eddie.

* * *

Darcy fiddled around her kitchen. She had already wiped the counter down three times and checked on the coffee that was already brewed. The smell of her homemade cinnamon buns permeated through her apartment. Ikey was still in the shower and she wanted everything to be perfect. She set the table, casually; mismatched plates and coffee mugs, she didn't want to look too pretentious. She sat on the edge of her couch and waited for him to come out. Then she jumped up and sat on the couch and propped her feet up, pulled a magazine out of the rack and pretended to read it. She was more nervous than a hooker in church. They had slept together for the first time last night and it was amazing. Ikey had been incredibly gentle and he made love to her long and slow, it was the most exquisite torture. If anyone had told her three weeks ago that she would be with David Eichorn; sidekick and wife-stealer, she would have laughed them off. But when he asked her out, he was so sweet about it and he seemed so insecure. It tugged at her heartstrings and she was afraid he still had a firm hold on them. If she wasn't careful she could easily fall in love with this guy. She heard him coming out of the bathroom and she almost jumped off the couch. Schooling herself to play it cool, she continued to pretend to read until he came strolling into her tiny living/dining room.

"Hey baby. You sleep well?" Ikey came into the room and planted a kiss on the top of her head. It wasn't an erotic kiss, but a familiar one and it made Darcy feel warm inside. He didn't leave, or look like he wanted to so he was racking up bonus points by the second.

"Good morning Ikey." Darcy shyly looked up at him and was stunned by the goofy look on his face.

Ikey sniffed the air appreciatively. "When'd you go out and get fresh pastries? I could smell them all the way in the shower. You get them from the bakery?"

"Uh, no, I made them."

"You made them? This morning?" Darcy felt embarrassed, was it too much?

"Well, I made the dough last night before you came over, I baked them this morning."

"You did that? For me?"

"Well, I knew you were coming over and well, I was hoping you'd stay the night and thought it might be nice to have a special breakfast in the morning. But if you don't like sweets, I could make you an omelet…"Darcy was already getting up and rooting around her fridge, "I mean, I have some cheese and ham, some bell peppers, I could make you a western, if you like cheese. I mean, maybe you'd rather some bacon and home fries, I'm sure I have some potatoes in here somewhere…" She continued to root around in the fridge taking things out and setting them on the counter. Damnit. She was nervous as hell and couldn't stop babbling. She didn't dare turn around in fear that Ikey would realize what a nutcase she was and want to leave.

"Darce…" He said it so quietly, she was afraid to hear the rest. "Darce, turn around, look at me." When she did, she couldn't quite read what his face was telling her.

"I'm nervous about this too. I really like you and last night, it was beyond incredible." He took her into his arms and started rubbing her back. "I asked you if you did this for me, because no woman has ever been kind enough to cook for me before and I was shocked. The cinnamon buns are fine. Thank you." He kissed her, gently on the lips, caressing her cheek while he did. Slowly her released her and opened her fridge and started putting the food back inside. She had so many bad relationships in the past that she had never had one that lasted this long without something going wrong. She stood there looking at him still not certain what the hell to do. When he was done, he turned to her and took her hand and walked her over to her little table. Nudging her into her seat, he went back to the kitchen and came back with the buns and the coffee pot. Filling her cup and his, he put the pot back and came and sat across from her. He reached across the table and took her hand, squeezing it gently. She looked up and he smiled. Yeah, she thought, it was pretty much a perfect morning.

* * *

"Saw Janet storm out this morning..." Phil sat behind his newspaper and commented, not even bothering to look up from what he was reading.

"Give it a rest Phil."

"Heard you two shouting at each other…."

"Jesus, can't you just get a life?"

"Nope, shut-in, remember?" Phil set the paper on his lap and looked at Eddie. He waited and when it seemed his friend wasn't going to explain, he raised his eyebrow. Disgusted, Eddie sighed out loud.

"Basically, I told her I can't sleep at her place. I just can't bring myself to do it Phil. He was there, with her.. And I can't share that place with her again. It's stupid, I know, but it's how I feel."

"I see. Sooooooooooo, you basically haven't forgiven her yet."

"See, that's just it. I have forgiven her, but I can't forget what happened there. I mean, give me a fucking break Phil… Can anyone see my side of things?" Eddie was pacing the room.

"Oh, I see your side of things. Plenty good. But you knew if you got back with Janet that you'd eventually have to face that room again. I mean, what do you expect her to do, move? It was her grandparent's house; they gave it to her Eddie. She can't just move from that house for a guy that hasn't even made it clear that he's committed to her. Saying I love you is one thing buddy, but the actions, they speak much louder than words." Phil snapped his paper back open and continued to read. Fuming, Eddie rolled his eyes heavenward and walked out the door to sit on the front porch.

* * *

"Why are you up so early?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Good Morning." Ronnie leaned over to kiss Aubrey. She was still had a look of sleep in her eyes, like she was barely holding on to her waking state. He was a morning person, and he had learned these past few weeks that Aubrey was definitely not.

"So, where are you going so early?"

"Home. Leslie's daughter Emily is coming in today and I gotta go meet her. Wanna come?" This had been a bone of contention between them. Ronnie insisted that the only way to do this was to rip the band-aid off and be together 100 percent. Aubrey was worried that showing up at the house would cause Nick pain and make the whole family feel uncomfortable. Ronnie understood but felt like he was the one taking the brunt of the heat and it wouldn't be directed at Aubrey so much.

"I don't know Ronnie, it's still so new…" Ronnie reached over and took her hand.

"Please Aubs. It's time. Let's do this." He searched her face for the answer he was looking for, and nodded when he saw her eyes make the decision.

Blowing out a deep breath, she said, "Okay Ronnie. Let's do this."

* * *

Leslie woke up with a start. She sat up in bed so quickly, it took the covers off Robert and her both. He stirred and asked her "What goes on?"

"Shhh!" She listened again and heard the unmistakable laugh of her daughter coming from downstairs. "She's here ! Robert, get up! My baby is here!"

Running around the room, she grabbed her robe and slippers and hauled ass out of the room. Robert had barely sat up before she was gone.

"EMILY??"

Emily looked up from the couch towards the stairs. Her and Nick had been talking non-stop for hours waiting for their parents to wake up. She hadn't seen her mother since Christmas and really missed her. Getting up from the couch, she smoothed out her clothes and tugged on the neckline of her tank, trying not to show as much cleavage. Glancing at Nick, he raised a questioning eyebrow at her. "Oh, just shut-up, you don't know how she can be!" Putting on her sweetest smile she called back, "I'm here Mommy!"

Nick mouthed the word _mommy_ and started silently rolling around on the couch with laughter. She was a mama's girl. For all her worldliness and forwardness, she was still mama's little girl.

"Oh my baby!" Leslie was wrapping her in her arms and holding her tightly, rocking from side to side. She held her away from her body and looked her up and down. Emily started to fidget. "Mom! Honestly. I'm 27 years old, don't go there."

"I didn't say anything!" Leslie held her tongue for about 5 seconds. "But if I was going to say something, I'd start with that blouse you have on, if you can even call it a blouse. And those jeans, I mean, really Em, did you have to sew them on?" Leslie continued to criticize like only mothers can do to their daughters. Deflated, Emily wondered how the hell she was going to make it for a whole month with her mother under the same roof. Nick sat on the couch laughing until he almost peed his pants.


	15. Chapter 15

* * *

A/N: A little something in here for you Marly. Enjoy!

**Chapter 15**

They all sat around drinking coffee and catching up. Emily really liked Robert. He was kinda on the quiet side, but he had a kindness in his eyes that was unmistakable. After being through tons of shitty relationships, Emily never undervalued kindness of the soul. While Emily was describing what life was like for her in Chicago, the front door opened and Ronnie walked in hand in hand with Aubrey. The mood in the room changed, subtly, but it changed. Nick's smile vanished, Robert started knitting his brow in worry and her mom just sat there, not saying anything at all. Catching on quickly, Emily jumped up and sashayed over to the offending couple and put her arms around them both in a trademark Emily hug.

"Hi guys! We were just wondering when you'd get here! I'm Emily, come on over and chat with us." She hooked her arms through each of theirs and walked them over to the couch where they found a seat with her in the middle. She chatted away and put everyone at ease with her funny accounts of near muggings and cold days waiting for the el-train. She engaged Aubrey and Nick in conversation together, talking about writing and asking intelligent questions on the subject. Then she'd switch and encourage Ronnie and Nick to share funny stories about their childhood. Before you knew it everyone was laughing and having a good time, like a real family should.

* * *

Janet wanted to call Hannah but stopped herself. They weren't exactly on the best terms because she had pulled out of the wedding so she decided to call Pizza Girl instead.

"Hey. Are you busy right now? Can you meet me for lunch?"

"No can do friend, I have this project I'm finishing up. It's way beyond late and my prof has been more than patient. Uhm, I do have a few minutes though, need to talk?"

"Yeah. I really do. So, Eddie and I get into it this morning about him not sleeping over my place…" Janet went on to explain the whole fight and the hurtful things that were said. Pizza Girl listened to Janet's side as any good girlfriend would; expressing her anger at the right moments. But after Janet was done, Pizza Girl stayed silent.

"So," Pizza Girl took her time to say the words carefully, "you think Eddie is in the wrong here?"

"Not totally," she admitted honestly, "but I feel like he could have met me halfway with this one. I mean it's not like I can move or anything."

"Hmmm..." Pizza Girl was being pretty non-committal in this conversation, furthering Janet to believe maybe she could have bent a little more. They continued the conversation, Janet making her case and Pizza Girl deflecting. By the time they hung up, Janet was sure she owed Eddie some sort of an apology. And she may have even needed to see his side of things a little better, that much was true, but he also needed to try and see hers as well.

* * *

He knew he was wrong to shout and curse like he did. He had apologized immediately for that when it happened. But what had him so steamed was the fact that Janet seemed to be so cavalier about why he was upset. Didn't she understand how much she had hurt him? Didn't she understand that her place had become his in a way? Didn't she understand that now all he would ever see in the four walls of her bedroom was Rooster banging her senseless, touching her body, kissing her lips? No, he had to make her see.

He took a long drag of the beer he was nursing. Eddie started to digest Phil's words from earlier that morning. But didn't she have a point too? It was her home and being at his place all the time was like having half a relationship. Phil accused him of not forgiving Janet. Maybe he was still holding onto his anger a bit. And then he realized all of a sudden where him and Janet had gone wrong. They had been trying to recapture what they had; sadly that just didn't seem possible. Sometimes you just can't go home again. Eddie sat on the porch, the weight of his decision weighing heavily on him. He had made up his mind and there was no changing it. Glancing at his watch, he noted it was almost time for band practice. He'd hang out at home for a few more hours with the guys and then he had something very important he had to do.

* * *

Around 2:30 that afternoon, Nick knocked on the door to the guest room/office.

"Hey Emily, you almost ready?"

"What? I can't hear you, just come in!" Nick opened the door and almost backed out in surprise. She was pulling a baby t-shirt over her head and he caught a glimpse of her lacy red bra. She had honey-colored skin and curves in the front and back. Damn! _Sister, sister, sister. _He told himself, over and over. Quickly, he turned his back and addressed her.

"Whoa!! I'm sorry; I thought you said come in. I…I'll be outside."

Emily started laughing. "Don't be stupid, come in. I'm sure, you've seen a woman in her bra before and I'm damn sure you've seen one in a bathing suit. I'm decent now, you can turn around. Sorry, I'm always dropping clothes at the gym in the locker room; you lose you inhibitions after a while. I'll try to go easy on you Big Brother… doesn't look like you can handle much excitement."

"You're right about that." He gave her a slow perusal, clearly liking what he saw.

Emily looked over her shoulder at him. "Keep looking at me like that and I might throw something on you that'll rock your world."

"Looking at you like what?"

"Like I'm gravy and you're the biscuit about to sop me up!"

Nick let out a howl of laughter and Emily joined in. Since they were going to be technically related soon, it would be too weird, but Emily was fast becoming one of his favorite people. "So, uhm, you ready to go?"

"Hell yeah! I'm looking forward to this air band thing. Think Phil will have any Prince? The old Prince, you know, none of that formerly known as crap. I've been in a Prince sort of mood lately."

"We'll see. Hey Emily? I wanted to thank you for earlier. I mean, I don't know if you noticed, but the way you eased the tension in the room? Just… well, thanks."

"No problem. So, do you love her?"

"What?"

"I said do you love her?"

"Who? Aubrey?" Nick felt there couldn't be anything further from the truth. "Nah, it was never like that. It just stings is all. You know, baby brother, ex-girlfriend."

"Well I imagine it would. But look at it this way, Aubrey and Ronnie being together? It just makes room in your life for the right person to come along, you know?" Nick nodded his head in agreement immediately thought of Hannah. "So, how do I look?" She spins around in a circle. She had pulled her braids back in a loose pony tail at the nape of her neck. She changed her long jeans into some shorter jeans that stopped mid calf and was wearing a very tight white t-shirt that had a picture of an orange slice across her chest dripping juice. _Nothing subtle in that message._ She was wearing white tennis sneakers with a delicate gold ankle bracelet on one leg. Her lips were glossy and damned if they didn't make you think of the same things as her shirt. Even though it should have been, it wasn't over the top. He inhaled the air and smelled coconut.

"One of a kind." Nick shook his head; she really was a breath of fresh air. Living in New York, he had met all kinds of people from all over. She was definitely going to liven things up around here.

Halfway out the front door they both heard Leslie screaming and running towards them, "EMILY, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING??"

Emily turned to Nick and said rather frantically, "Run!" And they did.

* * *

Ikey came up the block whistling. He still couldn't believe Darcy had made him homemade cinnamon buns. They were delicious, just like the lady herself. After waiting weeks to be with her, it was well worth the wait. He looked forward to living out all the fantasies he had about her over the next few days. He was pretty sure she was a keeper and it felt so good to finally have someone of his own that he could talk to the guys about.

Owen came from the opposite direction, whistling as well. He was going to be a daddy, again. There was nothing better in life. They had made love that afternoon after putting the kids down for their nap. It was a rare occasion that they could do something like that since it seemed the kids never napped at the same time these days. But today, it would seem, the moon and stars were in alignment and all was running smoothly in the Rowen household.

"Eichorn!" Owen crossed over Gelsen to meet him at the corner.

"Owen Rooowen! What up?"

"Nothing much buddy, life's just real good, that's all. You?"

"Can't complain, can't complain." Owen and Ikey turned up Gelsen and walked the block to Eddie and Phil's place in companionable silence. Reaching the house, Eddie was sitting outside enjoying a cold beer on the porch. He was sitting in one of those plastic lawn chairs with his feet propped up on the railing.

He tipped his beer toward them and said "Fellas…"

"Hey Eddie, what goes on?"

"Nothin' much, woman troubles. You know there's always some drama."

"Well, not always." Ikey had a goofy grin on his face. Owen slapped him on the back and looked at him more closely.

"Well it's about time! Was it hot? I mean… well, was it hot?" Hot, it seemed, was Owen's favorite word for any occasion.

"Yeah, it was pretty intense. She's fantastic. She made me homemade cinnamon buns this morning. I thought I had died and gone to heaven."

Eddie plunked down his seat and leaned forward. "Wait? She baked for you? From scratch? Ikey, don't you _ever_ walk away from that woman."

"Hell no! A woman who will cook for you? That can never be overvalued." Owen was sincere. Allison was a wonderful cook and he had missed her cooking terribly when they were apart. If he had to have the Commander's chicken casserole one more time….

"Damn straight. Don't let that one get away." Phil said through the window. He was sitting in his chair by the window off the porch and could hear the whole conversation.

"Don't let who get away?" Nick was walking up the stairs with Emily. She was smiling at the guys, and not in a shy way.

"Darcy. She made Ikey breakfast. Homemade cinnamon bu…." Ikey couldn't finish his sentence. He was too distracted by Emily's t-shirt, or what was underneath it. As soon as she walked up the few stairs to the porch, they were all enveloped in her scent and were suddenly reminded of a tropical breeze. Eddie was the first to break free of the trance.

"Uh, Nicky, who's your beautiful friend?" Eddie was turning on the Latekka charm almost instinctually. For a split second he forgot about Janet. Just for a split second.

Emily grabbed Nick's arm and said teasingly, "Ooooohhh, can I have this one?" He laughed as all the guys looked her over. Ikey openly stared at her, Owen, just dropped his head and tried to steal glances every now and then, and Phil was pressed so close to the window screen that he would definitely have a waffle imprint on his face later.

Nick responded in a mock whisper, "Sorry Em, taken. In fact, all of them are." She put on the cutest pout she could muster. Then she put her hand to her heart and said in a breathy voice.

"The good ones always are." All the guys laughed at that and Nick started making introductions.

Clearing his throat, "This is my soon to be step-sister, Emily. Emily, this is Eddie, Owen, Ikey and over there in the window is Phil."

"Nice to meet ya'll." She looked around and started shaking hands. "What do you say we go inside? I'm parched. Eddie, I would love one of those cold beers you got there, if that's okay." She linked her arm in his and was more or less leading _him_ into the house.

"What? Uh, sure, sure. Of course, come on in." Eddie walked with her and Phil was at the door in record time, oblivious to the "dangers" of the outside world; he had it swinging open with his hand sweeping in front of him.

"After you milady."

"And who said chivalry is dead."

* * *

Hannah putzed around the house looking for something to do. It was a Saturday afternoon and Sam was out playing with Doodie and some other friends from school. She had already done her laundry and cleaning for the week and had finalized anything that could be finalized at this point for the wedding. She was bored. Janet and her were barely speaking and she missed her friend so much. Hannah was surprised, even though she shouldn't have been when Janet excused her self from the wedding. She told Hannah she would still be a guest if she wanted her there but she couldn't stand with her. It was a strong statement but then, Janet was one of the strongest people she knew. She always stood up for what she believed in or in this case, refused to stand up for something she didn't. Hannah knew all the gang couldn't see why she was still with Ray and they had all kept their distance as a result. Speaking of the devil, he came into the room, smelling fresh from the shower wearing only some cargo shorts he liked to knock around the house in. Bare-chested and bare-footed he came up behind her as was his thing, and held her tight. He whispered in her ear and trailed kisses down her neck. No one could understand that this was the feeling that she couldn't walk away from. It was warm and safe and above all things, dependable. Nick thought she would leave after finding out what Ray supposedly did, but she asked him about it, and having never lied to her in the past she believed him when he said that Matt Lausch was desperate and bitter and just trying to make trouble for him. He admitted to egging Eddie on that day in their shop, but he denied having anything to do with the attack. After listening to his side, she believed him; in fact she needed to believe him. Unfortunately Nick and Eddie had seen her when she was in doubt and then she had gone and apologized to Eddie. All these actions made it look even more so like she was going to leave Ray over. So her friends were disappointed in her and she knew it. But Hannah also knew she wasn't an innocent and that Ray wasn't either. But she loved him and she also knew forgiving him for this would give her leverage when the whole paternity issue came up later. She was doing all of this to ensure her future to make sure her and Sam were safe and taken care of. That she would have someone who wouldn't leave her. And to Hannah, staying and being dependable, that was love.

"Come on Hannah Jane, let's go upstairs for a little while." His hands were roaming all over her body and he was igniting that passion in her that he always could.

"Ray…" But he wouldn't be denied; he swung her around and was kissing her full on the mouth. He was already pulling her t-shirt over her head and trying to get at the clasp of her bra.

"Hannah…I love you." He kissed her exposed collar bone, " I need you." He kissed her shoulders as he lowered the straps of her bra, "I want you baby…" She was turned on to the maximum at this point. She started pulling at the waist of his shirts, fumbling with the snap. Pushing it down to the floor, she went straight for his boxer briefs and pushed them down as far as she could without breaking the kiss. Ray moaned with desire at being released from his constricting underwear, he started saying her name desperately. Over and over he would say, I love you Hannah Jane, I need you in my life. It was like a spell being cast on her, like he knew exactly what she needed to hear. They sank right to the floor of the living room. All her worries were pushed aside as Ray made her feel like the only woman in the world.

* * *

They all sat around laughing and drinking beers. Emily was a hit with the guys, after her initial flirting (which none of them seem to be able to handle and breathe at the same time, including Eddie) she settled down and tried to get to know them. As seemed to be her gift, she was able to engage the group in conversation and keep everyone involved, even if it didn't directly have to do with them.

"So. When does your band usually go on? I thought Nick said 3 o'clock. It's closing in on 4 fellas."

"Really?" Phil glanced up at the clock on the wall, totally thrown. Owen stood up to leave.

"I promised Allison I would only stay an hour. I gotta be heading back. Hey Emily, it was so nice to meet you. I'm sure I'll see you again, really soon." Owen went to shake her hand, and she pushed it aside and gave him a hug.

"No can do, give me one song before you go. I want the full experience and I don't want to wait for next Saturday." Phil was already in the room rooting around in his collection for just the right song.

"They're dorks, you don't really want to see them 'play' in this make believe band, do you?"

"What, you don't play?" She looked at Eddie and the light bulb went off. "Oh, you're _that_ guy." Eddie lifted his eyebrow and said.

"What guy?"

"The guy who's too cool to dance at a party; the one who leans on the wall while all the girls flock to him. Am I right?"

"Damn straight." Eddie smirked down at her and tipped his beer with hers in cheers.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

The guys all dispersed quickly after their jam session. Phil had an appointment with his therapist at 5 and Eddie said he needed to go out for a while. Owen went home to his family leaving Nick, Emily and Ikey to trudge over to Sully's for drinks before dinner. When they walked into the place it was already starting to get busy for dinner. Walking over to their "table", they sat down and waited for Karen or Janet to work their way over.

Janet saw Nick, Ikey and a pretty short black woman walk into the place. Nick had his hand on the small of her back, leading her to a table. She smiled at him and laughed at something he said. Ikey and Nick both were very solicitous with this young woman and seemed to be falling over themselves to make her comfortable and happy. Interesting. She wondered if Eddie had told them about the fight they had this morning. Shoulders sinking just a bit, Janet searched around for Karen. She was too busy, so Janet had no choice but to face the music.

"Hey guys! Can you believe how busy we are already? It's barely after 5!" Janet already had a pen in hand waiting to take their orders; it all seemed a little too cheerful and bright.

"He said he had some things to take care of, you two fighting again?" Ikey asked her astutely.

Dropping the pen and pad to her sides, she replied, "That obvious huh?"

"Pretty obvious to us anyway." Nick looked at her sympathetically. "Oh hey Janet, this is Emily. Emily, Janet."

"Oh! You're the Dean's daughter! It's nice to meet you! I hope you're enjoying the Ridge so far?" Janet was able to get a closer look. She really was quite pretty. She had that air of confidence about her that Janet always lacked when it came to her looks. She noticed the way Nick and Ikey were glancing at her appreciatively. It kind of surprised her though since she was a little on the bigger size and she had only ever saw Nick or Ikey with thin girls before.

"Nice to meet you too girl. I've been enjoying the Ridge very much. Especially the men! I have to say, so far it doesn't disappoint. Got a little something for everyone. And that Eddie Latekka? Mmmmm-mmm." Emily closed her eyes and pretended she tasted something really delicious. Janet laughed a bit self-consciously. Nick and Ikey looked worried that something was about to happen, but to their surprise Janet just took their order and went back to the bar to start fixing their drinks. Insanely jealous at this point, Janet wondered if she had flirted with Eddie, and if he had flirted back with Emily.He probably couldn't take his eyes off her sliced fruit! Her angry words to him this morning came flooding back as well as her insecurity as far as where she stood with him. Lost in thought, she didn't notice Emily had walked up to the bar, until she spoke.

"I'm sorry if I upset you when I mentioned Eddie." Emily looked at Janet, trying to gauge her reaction.

"Oh, it's okay. I mean, Eddie is a pretty big deal around here and well…a lot of women have an appreciation for him." Janet was proud of how diplomatic she sounded.

Emily just stared at her. She rolled her eyes and said in an exasperated tone, "Yes, yes, yes, that may well be true. But I'm not apologizing for admiring a good looking man." She waved her hand back and forth as if the shoo away nonsense. "That's normal. What I'm sorry about is the fact that I seemed to upset you. Nick and Ikey told me that you and Eddie are seeing each other. I'm sorry; I didn't mean to be disrespectful of that. If I had known he was your man…." Janet immediately felt bad for jumping to conclusion about Emily. But she still felt dejected and the first thing that came to her mind came out of her mouth.

"Well, clearly when you met him, he didn't mention me. Sooooo, I'm not exactly sure if we are seeing each other anymore. We kinda had a fight this morning." Janet replied bitterly.

Emily reached across the bar and squeezed her hand.

"He _did_ mention he had a girlfriend and he wore it like a shield to protect himself from my advances. We just never got around to names. Don't worry, I wasn't too brazen." Emily paused, rethinking that, "well, maybe a little, but he handled it like a pro. Besides, he's a hot blooded male; it's hard not to look at a pretty package." She smiled because she had just given herself a compliment. Then she continued, "But I knew after about 5 minutes in that he was in a committed relationship and very committed to that person. My question is, why does it seem like you don't know all of this?"

Janet liked her candor. There was something about Emily that made you want to talk to her. She shrugged her shoulders in a 'what the hell' type gesture and started telling Emily the story of Janet and Eddie. If anyone had walked by, they would have thought Emily was the bartender and Janet was the patron. They chatted on and off for over an hour in between servings and rounds. Nick and Ikey seemed to understand their need to girl talk and let them be. Emily was refreshing and Janet liked her more and more by the second. Before she knew it, Nick was coming over, telling Emily it was time to go home for dinner. Janet walked around the bar and gave her a hug. She thanked her for the talk. She realized it was nice to talk to someone who didn't know the whole situation. Emily offered her a different perspective and gave Janet cause to think.

"Hey, Emily!" Janet called to her just as she was walking away.

"What's up?"

"Well, tomorrow a bunch of the girls and I are having brunch at my place. Kind of a girls day in. I would love it if you came?"

Emily lit up like a 500 watt bulb. Oh yea, Janet thought, she was a man-eater with those looks. "I'd love it. What can I bring?" The girls chatted a few more minutes while Nick waited impatiently switching from foot to foot. Finally, when they started winding down, he walked over to Emily, grabbed her hand and started pulling her towards the door.

"I'll give her directions or bring her by myself Janet. 'Night!" He called over his shoulder. Then he looked at Emily and said, "You just got here, how is it that you have more friends than me already?"

* * *

Eddie stood inside Janet's front door just after 7 pm. He hadn't been inside since that night when he and her had sex right up against her living room wall. Eddie still felt a little embarrassed by his behavior that night, the way he treated her by walking out right afterwards. Even though he had come back, the damage was done and she was justifiably angry. Taking a deep breath, Eddie ventured around the living room, everything looked much the same, but it all felt so different to him. Slowly, he headed towards the kitchen, peeking in the fridge, smiling when he saw his favorite beer in there. Apparently Janet had hope that he would one day come back and be comfortable here. He walked to the guest room that doubled as her office. Nothing new there. Finally, he headed into her bedroom. It was hard, images of Janet and that son of a bitch assailed him as he entered the room. Closing his eyes for a minute to get a grip, he opened them slowly and looked at the bed. He saw him and Janet, their first time, laughing and stripping, that god awful Bay City Rollers playing in the background. He looked over to the bathroom door and saw Janet standing in the doorway in a new nightgown she had bought just for him. He smiled slowly at that memory. Okay, maybe he could do this. Jaw set in determination; Eddie turned around and headed for the supplies in his truck.

* * *

Ikey made his way over to Darcy's place around 6:30. He stopped at the grocery store to pick up some flowers for her. They had some pink lilies which he thought were perfect. They were fragrant and beautiful, and he hoped she'd like them. Being with Darcy this past month had made Ikey a better person. She was so kind and loving. When you first met her, you would think she was stand-offish, but it was just that she really didn't seem to know how to socialize without anxiety. She was scared of group situations, where she might have to engage in conversation or debate. Darcy had once told him she preferred a day inside watching football to going out shopping with the girls.

Running up the stairs to her apartment, Ikey glanced at his cell phone clock and noted with relief he wasn't more than a few minutes late. Knocking on her door, he anxiously awaited her to answer. When she didn't answer after a minute, he knocked again, a little louder. When she still didn't answer, he started to get worried, banging on the door now, he waited until he heard her running to the door. It flew open and he was very surprised by what he saw.

* * *

Janet drove up to her place at around 2 am. She fully intended on running in and getting some clothes and going to Eddie's. After talking with Emily, she realized that she just needed to give him time, give him some control in a situation where he had lost it. So she would go to him, be patient and hope they could ride this out together instead of apart. She vowed to herself she wouldn't walk out on him again not unless he wanted her to go. She was surprised when she looked up and saw Eddie's truck in her driveway. Excitement ran through her entire body, could this possibly mean…?

"Eddie?" She called out from the door as she kicked her shoes off. She padded barefoot towards her bedroom, not sure what she'd find. Her nose picked up an odd scent that didn't quite belong. She turned the knob to her bedroom door and pushed it open, only to meet resistance behind it.

"Shiiiiiiittt!!" _Uh-oh_. "What the hell?" He was speaking so loudly and had paint all over the front of his shirt; the door was wet with paint and now he was an alarming shade of white.

"I'm sorry! I didn't know you were behind the door; I called out to you, but you didn't answer. What goes …?" Janet's voice trailed off as she really looked around the room. He had painted it a soft sage green and did the trim and doors in a bright glossy white. He knew this shade of green was her favorite color and she always said she wanted to paint her bedroom one day. She just never got around to it.

"Hey. Sorry." He took off his headphones and his voice lowered to a more normal volume. "I was listening to some music, I didn't here you come in. I… I'm painting your room." He finished lamely.

"This much is obvious." Janet was looking at him, trying to decipher what he was thinking.

"Can we go into the living room and talk for a minute? I know you've had a long day but after this morning, well… can we just talk I got some things I need to say."

Taking a deep breath and putting on a passable smile she responded, "Of course Eddie."

He turned to strip off his now ruined shirt, rolled it up and put it in the corner of the room. Checking to make sure his pants were okay, he strolled in the living room and sat on the couch next to her bare-chested. He smelled a little musky from the labor he had obviously put in painting her room. Taking her hand, he looked at her and started telling her everything that was in his heart. And for once in Eddie Latekka's life, he held nothing back.

* * *

"I'm sorry Ikey!" She blurted out as soon as she swung the door open. Darcy looked like hell. She was wearing a sexy peach negligee with black lace trim. The image would have immediately turned Ikey on but her hair was all mussed (not the good way) and she was wearing a ratty looking bathrobe over it. She was a vision of contradictions.

"Darce, you okay?" Ikey was in the door and had her gathered in his arms in one fell swoop. He was holding her and could tell right away she was burning up.

"I'm sick. I'm so sorry about dinner. I haven't finished cooking yet. I just had to lie down on the couch for a few minutes."

"Finish cooking yet? Jeeez Darce! When did you start feeling with way?"

"I don't know, I was at work and started feeling pretty run down. By the time work was over I had the cold sweats, but I wanted to make you this dinner so badly. So I went to the market and made it home somehow, showered, thinking that would help, but it was all downhill from there."

"Darcy, you should have called me."

"I know, I'm sorry. I can try to get dinner finished for you…" Disgusted at how obtuse she was being, Ikey literally swept her off her feet. She let out a breathy, _oh _my, and snuggles closely into his arms. He took his foot and kicked the door shut and carried her straight to her bed. He lay her down gently, pulling back the covers and getting her settled. Kissing her gently on the forehead, he pushed back her hair to feel how warm she was. Knitting his brows, he went to her bathroom. Curious, Darcy craned her neck, trying to see what he was doing. He came back in the room with a thermometer and some Alleve. Taking her temperature, he shook his head in disgust. Still not saying a word, he walked to the kitchen, poured her a glass of orange juice and came back with two pills and the juice.

"Take these." She did as she was told giving him a wane smile. "You hungry?" He asked her.

"I want to curl up and die, I couldn't even think about eating. Ikey, please don't make me." He finally smiled at her.

"I won't, don't worry. Will it bother you if I stay? I don't want to leave you like this."

Darcy was beaming on the inside, he wanted to stay, even though she probably looked disgusting and was gonna get him sick too. "I might get you sick…."

Waving his hand in a shooing motion, he said, "Nah, I don't care about that. I just want to make sure I'm close by if you need anything."

"Okay then Ikey. I'd love it if you stayed." Nodding his head once, Ikey sat on the other side of the bed pulling off his work boots. He would get up and shower in a bit, maybe try to find something to eat, but right now, he just wanted to hold her and make sure she was okay.

* * *

"Janet, I'm sorry about this morning. I think there might have been a little truth to what you said, about not totally forgiving you and what happened that night." He still had a hard time saying it out loud. "The thing is, I think I needed to stay a little mad at you, keep myself distanced a little from you, in order to protect myself, protect my heart."

Janet hung her head; knowing she hurt Eddie so badly would always be with her and she would always feel so horrible about it. "I'm so sorry Eddie. It was unexcus…"

"Shhhh." He put his fingers to her lips, something she always did to him. "It's my turn, remember? Anyway, do you remember that first time we had sex?"

"Of course Eddie, it was wonderful. I'll always remember that night."

"Me too. Didn't you ever wonder why we hadn't had sex sooner?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, I just figured we were taking things slow at first, but I'll admit I was scared because I didn't want you to see me naked. I was also afraid that I wouldn't be any good at it, I mean you had so much… experience. So, I didn't push it, but then I was worried we'd never do it so…On the Waterfront happened." She wouldn't look him in the eye. He lifted her chin up and made her look at him as he spoke.

"Yeah, I figured you were worried about that, even though you shouldn't have been. I was very much looking forward to being with you. But I was glad to, because it gave me time and I was stalling."

Surprise flashed in front of her face. "What do you mean?"

"Well, it's just that you're not the only one with insecurities." He blew out a long breath and continued. "I have them too. I was scared of that night eventually happening, just like I was scared to start getting serious with you in the beginning. I was scared of falling in love, of letting someone have that kind of control over me again. After Rory… I vowed never to let someone have that ability to hurt me again. But slowly despite myself, over these past few years, I was drawn to you. Your quick smile, the way we could just talk for hours, it meant so much to me. And even back then, before I started realizing that this was a true attraction, I was fighting it. Going out with any girl I could, having meaningless sex. But Janet, when you and I finally got together and stared dating and then that first night? It was like... POW!" He punched a fist in his hand. "I knew it was love, way back then, and I fought it, tooth and nail quite frankly because the very idea scared me shitless. I didn't want to start depending on you to be there and then all of a sudden you weren't. I didn't want to start expecting too much from you and then have you let me down. I just didn't want to risk that part of myself. But my need, my need to be with you outweighed my fears and when we had our fist time, it was… well, damned if it wasn't perfect. That was the very first time I consider myself having made love. I've had sex, sure, but making love? That was a first for me. Even with Rory, we were young and it was different. That night, you and me, it meant so much more to me than I think you even realized."

He took a deep breath, knowing the next part was going to hurt her some, "Anyway, the thing that happened with you and Rooster? It hurt me so bad, I wanted to die. It was the most horrible thing that I had never imagined could even happen? I mean, Janet, _my Janet?_ And then to think that I might have had a hand in it, it was almost too much for me to bear. And I was angry, angry with myself at first for letting you get that close to me; for falling in love with you. I was angry at you for making such a huge error in judgment. Mostly I was just plain angry. And today, I realized that we can't go back to the way things were. It's just not possible. We're different people now."

"Oh." Janet was at a loss for words, she was trying to process everything. So was him painting her room a goodbye gift? Confused and almost incapable of holding it together she looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "I guess I understand Eddie. We tried; I guess sometimes you can't…."

"What? No, no, no. That's not what I mean." He finally smiled at her, started stroking her cheek. "Janet, I love you and I'm so in love with you it hurts. Maybe if I had told you sooner, things would have been different and you wouldn't have gone looking for that love somewhere else. I've noticed this change in you and it's a good thing. You're more confident and I hope that also translates to us. Because baby, I need you to be sure and confident in us. We have to trust each other and trust _in_ each other. I won't keep pushing you away and trying to work through things without you anymore, but you have to do the same." He looked at her as if waiting for her to agree, willing her to do so. She nodded her head. He continued, "So, I thought we could use a fresh start. A new beginning. I thought we could start by redecorating you room and making new memories here; erase some of the bad ones. It's the only way I could think to do this." Eddie turned his hands up in a questioning gesture, not sure if he got his point across to her.

Janet was no longer able to hold back the tears. They started flowing from her freely as she pulled Eddie in towards her for a kiss. They touched foreheads and just looked at each other, breathing in each other's essence and forming a new bond; one that would be unshakable.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: You might want to be alone for this one. Warning, may get so hot you burn yourself. **

**Chapter 17**

Janet stood over Eddie indulging herself for a few minutes that she didn't have. They had slept in the guest room, since her room still smelled of the paint from the night before. They stayed up extra late, making love slowly on the couch, and then again in the guest room. She was so happy that they finally seemed to be on the same page. Janet sighed, she wished she could spend the day with him, but it was her turn to host brunch and the girls were going to be here at 10:30, whether she was ready or not. There was still a lot of stuff to do and she wanted to make sure Eddie was out of the house. Can't have a girl's day in with guys around!

She loved watching him sleep. His face was so relaxed and he tended to smile like a little boy. Tempted to wake him up with a morning delight, she shook her head and bent close to his ear instead. She said softly, but in a firm voice, "Eddie, baby. Wake up." Eddie groaned a little and stretched. Barely opening his eyes, his arms came up and pulled her down onto him.

"Not awake yet woman. Leave me be." Janet waited a minute lying awkwardly over him, and then poked him in the ribs with her index finger.

"Eddie. Come on. You gotta get moving. The girls will be here in a little over an hour and I have stuff to do."

Disgusted, he pulled away from her and rolled over in the bed, taking the covers with him. He said in his raspy morning voice, "But, I don't have a damn thing to do. Go ahead, the noise won't bother me. I just want to sleep a few more hours." Peeking from beneath the sheets he saw it was only 9 o'clock. Making a hissing sound with his teeth, he amended, "maybe three or four. How the hell can you be up and about? We went to sleep at the same time!" He covered his head again and tried to burrow beneath the covers and pillows as much as he could.

Exasperated, Janet yanked the sheets straight off of him to expose a very naked Eddie. This time she would definitely take a minute to admire the view. She was instantly turned on by just the mere sight of him. He immediately balled up in a fetal position, shocked by the cold air from the ac in the room. "What the hell Janet!" Sighing loudly, he sat up, no air of concern about his clothe-less state. Janet glanced at the clock and decided she could take a few _more_ minutes. Biting her bottom lip she started peeling her clothes off. She was wearing a gauzy looking white blouse with a camisole underneath. No bra and a pair of jeans. Immediately cottoning on to her intentions, Eddie slid over to the edge of the bed, sitting with his legs slightly open and fully aroused. The sound of her zipper was harsh, but it acted as an aphrodisiac to both of them. She kicked her jeans away and walked to him in only a pair of low rise stripped cotton panties. Standing right in front of him, she sank to her knees much to his surprise and proceeded to give him the best head of his life. Janet had only done this a few times, but never unsolicited and without a little alcohol in her. But today, she was taking control and once she was close to making him explode, he grabbed her by the back of her head and yanked her head back so she could look at him. He was breathing hard and so was she. They stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity and then just that quickly he was pushing her to the floor, ripping her underwear off, spreading her legs open and thrusting inside of her.

"Thank God!" Janet and Eddie both sighed together. They moved together, slowly at first, but soon the tempo increased and before it had really begun, it was over. It was quick but very satisfying. Eddie collapsed on top of her for just a few seconds, and then rolled over onto his back on the floor. He blew out a loud breath and just shook his head in amazement. Damned if she had ever done something like that before. He started to get hard gain, just thinking about it. Looking at her, ready to pounce again, she jumped up from the floor.

"Uh-uh. You gotta get showered and get out of here. Sorry baby, no boys allowed."

"Janet… baby…you gonna just leave me like this?" He looked down sadly at his lap; it really wasn't up for the occasion, but trying very hard to stay straight and motivated.

She shook her head and laughed. "It looks like you're barely able to hold up that soldier. Take a cold shower, it should help." Grabbing her clothes from the floor, she stopped and examined her now ripped and ruined underwear. "Damn, I really liked these." Rolling them up in a ball, she tossed them in the wastebasket and headed naked for her bedroom to get another pair.

Eddie was fast, right behind her in less than 5 seconds; he pushed her up against her dresser. She was facing the mirror and could see the raw desire in his eyes. "Does that feel like I'm not up for the occasion?" He pushed a little and she could feel him rock hard against her back. Massaging her slowly, he breasts, her stomach, down between her legs, she started moaning. He grabbed her chin and twisted her face around so he could thrust his tongue into her mouth.

"Janet…"

He bent his knees so he could enter her, pushing her forward a little more, she looked down in ecstasy. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled it backward so she could see herself in the mirror. "You look so sexy, so free. I want you to see what I see, what I love. I want you to see how crazy you make me." He slid into her them, moving slowly, never breaking eye contact with her reflection in the mirror. She slowly started to close her eyes. "No Janet, look at me. I love it when you look at me." He eyes flew back open and he started moving expertly behind her, still holding her hair, using it to move her to his will. Soon he saw that look and her eyes started to glaze and he knew she was close. When she finally climaxed, the pressure on him was so great, he released all that he had into her as well.

Slumped over her, Eddie just stood there, knees wobbly from being spent so quickly and twice for that matter. Janet started to wiggle, uncomfortable from his weight. "Eddie…" She said in her warning tone.

He laughed and kissed her neck. "Sorry. Sorry. I'm so drained. I think you stole my life force or something."

"Well that's what you get for starting round two before you were ready, champ." Pushing herself up from the dresser, she shoved him until he started to 'disengage' himself from her. "I'm going to take another shower and then you can hop in. Okay?"

"Why don't I just join you?" _Was he actually trying for a third go round?_

"Absolutely not. I will not be responsible for you nearly killing yourself. You're not as young as you think you are." And with that final insult, she left him gaping in the room as she closed the bathroom door firmly behind her. Shrugging his shoulders, he plopped down on the bed in her room, admiring his handiwork. The color added warmth to the room but still kept it bright and cheerful just like the woman herself. Yawning, he stretched out and fell fast asleep in her new room, comforted by the first memory they created together.

…………………………….

At 10:15, Janet heard a car door slam. _Shit. Someone's early._ Peeking through her curtains she saw Emily and Nick strolling up her pathway. Eddie was still in the shower, but at least the place was decent enough and the tables were set up outside already. Janet had a couple of bottles of marginally cheap champagne chilling on ice and the orange juice, ready to make mimosas. She had a frittata in the oven and two quiches in the warmer. Everyone else was bringing something, so she was sure there would be more than enough food. Opening the door, she put on her happy hostess smile.

"Hey Emily! Good morning." She was wearing a bright yellow loosely fitted t-shirt that scooped really low at the neckline. To accompany it, the had a knew length black skirt, that looked like it was made of the same t-shirt like material. Even casually dressed, she looked sexy. Janet wondered if she could ever pull of a look like that. Emily walked through the door, kicking off her sandals as she stepped over the threshold. Nick followed behind her, presumably carrying the dish she made.

"Hey girl! Thanks for the invite. I'm sorry we're early." She gave Janet a big hug and then rolled her eyes and looked over at Nick. "I think someone was hoping to see this Hannah person before it got crowded." Emily walked past Janet into the living room. She made herself right at home. Looking around, picking up pictures, and commenting on vases and such. Nick shook his head and turned to Janet.

"To think I was worried she'd be a little nervous, meeting new people. Silly me."

"Hey Nick, Eddie's still here, you can hang around if you want, till he gets ready to go too."

"Oh, that would be great, where is he?"

"I think he's in the room getting dressed, right over there." Janet pointed in the direction of the bedroom, Emily pretending to tiptoe, followed Nick.

"Hey! We're not that good a friends yet hussy! Get away from that door!"

Emily snapped her fingers in mock frustration; and then the two of them started laughing at their antics.

That is how Hannah and Allison found them, when they came in the door. Introductions were made and soon, Darcy, still looking a little peaked from the night before came in, followed by Aubrey. Pizza girl had called Hannah's cell to tell her she'd be late. Soon after the girls arrived, Nick and Eddie left. Nick was disappointed he didn't have an opportunity to speak with Hannah alone. Hannah and Janet pretended for the day that they had no troubles between them and overall, everyone seemed to be having a good time. Despite some misgiving, Allison and Darcy both liked Emily (they had heard lots about her the day before).

"So, what goes on with this Pizza Girl?" Emily asked, trying to use the lingo of the town.

"What do you mean?" Hannah asked her.

"Well, what's her name? And, why does everyone call her Pizza Girl."

"Well, the guys are always making up names for hot girls and stuff and with her it just kinda stuck, even after she started date Phil." Hannah shrugged her shoulders.

"Yeah, but what is her actual god given name." Hannah stopped eating mid-bite and scrunched up her face.

"Uh, is it, Cookie? Wait, no, it's Zoe." Hannah deadpanned.

"No, no, no. I'm pretty sure it's Samantha. Peggy? Is it Peggy?" Janet looked bewildered. "I'm sure she told me at least once."

"I thought for sure it was Phoebe, or Beth….wait, Egg? No, no, Egg's her little sister. Oh shoot, I can't remember." Allison looked thoughtful.

"Aubrey, Darcy, you want to take shot at it? Let's put a five in each, and see who's right. I'll take the money over to that Church on main and make a donation for whatever charity… in Pizza Girls name."

"I'll go with Molly. I think she came into the hardware store once. I'm sure it's Molly." Darcy piped up. She was trying so hard to fit in with Ikey's friends, she wanted them to like her, as she already was starting to like them very much.

"Amanda. Yeah, I'm gonna say it was Amanda." Aubrey remembered that name from the past, but couldn't quite put a face on it, must be Pizza Girl's name then.

Half an hour later, Pizza Girl showed up. Emily opened the door and tried to hold in her surprise. Well this certainly was different. Yellow braids, red hair, stripped stockings, many layers. Very artsy.

"Hi! You must be Emily? The guys were talking about you so much yesterday. Phil especially, he just kept going on and on and on. I must admit I was a little jealous, but, hey, if he's gonna leave me, he'll have to walk out the door first and since I still got some time on that, I figured why even be worried! Besides, you can't…." She just didn't breath. The girl kept talking as she walked in past Emily and headed towards the kitchen for food Amazing. It was like a filibuster or something!

"I'm sorry; I didn't catch your name?" Emily held her hand out to shake as she walked over to her.

"Oh! Sorry! I'm Phil's girlfriend. Everyone just calls me Pizza Girl since that's how he described me to his friends. I deliver pizza… you know Ridge Pizza? Have you tried it yet, it's really fantastic. You know, pizza actually originated…" _Oh my god! Someone who could talk more than me? Lord save us._

"Ahem. So, what's your name again? You know, your actual name?"

"Oh, sorry. I'm so not used to using it anymore. It's Penelope, but my family calls me Pepper. Some of my friends at school call me Penny."

"Nice to meet you _Penelope_." They shake hands as everyone behind her starts throwing money on the table in disgust.

_**A special thanks to Jfly6766 and NewnanGaFan for the name for Pizza Girl.**_

_**Here's the link to the thread that we all tried to give Pizza Girl a name.**_

_**abc./primetime/octoberroad/index?pnmb&cat41338&tid250977&tsn1**_


	18. Chapter 18

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* * *

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Chapter 18

Rooster packed the last of his things. Looking around his bedroom, he took in the place he had lived all of his life, heaved his duffel over his shoulder and walked out the door.

"Vincent, are you sure this is what you want?" His mother stood, hovering in the doorway, wringing her hands in a handkerchief.

"Yeah ma. I gotta get out of here. It's time and if I don't go now, I may never leave. I'll just be a few towns over and I'll be back often to visit, but I need a fresh start you know?"

She looked at her baby, tears in her eyes, "She could have been really happy with you honey. It's her loss."

Sadly, Rooster considered his mother's words, "No ma, it's mine." He gave her a peck on the cheek and walked out the door to his car. He never had many friends, and to be honest, Janet was his closest. Losing her after his horrendous mistake had been the straw to break the camel's back. There was a community college in Bishop Flats and he was going to do what he always wanted, he was going to finish school. Sidetracked and preoccupied nearly half his life by a woman who had always loved him but would never be in love with him, Rooster decided it was time to move on. But before he left, he had one stop to make.

* * *

Glancing at her watch, Allison announced, "Well, I better get going. I have tons to do today, laundry, ironing and I still have to cook dinner!"

"Susie-homemaker! I'm just planning on popping in a frozen lasagna, let the men fend for themselves." Hannah, maybe more than a little buzzed, slurred at Allison. Allison just gave her an indulgent mommy smile.

"True, but the rewards far outweigh the hassle. There's nothing like a well fed Owen!" Allison wrinkled her nose in delight, no doubt caught in some sensual memory involving food, Owen and their bedroom.

"Hey Allison, think you could give me a ride at least into town? I really don't feel like walking in my incredibly cute, overly priced and extremely painful sandals."

"Sure Emily. Come on." Allison and Emily said their goodbyes. Emily walked over to Janet, hugging her and thanking her over and over for the wonderful girl time. Hooking her arm through Allison's, she trooped down the steps with her, chatting away as Janet stood to close the door. Shaking her head in wonder, she felt a little sorry for Allison. She just wasn't used to the wild gals yet, and Emily was proving to be the wildest of the bunch.

When she turned around, she saw Darcy picking up and bringing things to the kitchen, Hannah, Aubrey and Pizza Girl were gathering their things to leave.

"So soon?" Janet was a little disappointed. She was hoping to have time alone with Hannah so maybe they could come to a better understanding about things. Perhaps find a middle ground, and if truth be told, Janet was hoping to convince her into not marrying that jerk. But Hannah had known her friend for far too long and knew this is what she'd want to do. Feeling too weak from the alcohol and her constant emotional state, she decided it was better to escape while she could.

"Yeah, I'm supposed to pick Sam up in an hour and the walk will help me clear the booze out of my system some. Wouldn't want people to know we were hitting the bottle so early in the day."

"And you, Penny?" Janet tried using her name deliberately throughout the entire time. It just didn't work for her. "Ugh, I'm sorry, but can I go back to calling you PG?"

Pizza Girl threw her head back and laughed. "Of course, I never minded it. I gotta get back, Phil and I have a date planned for the backyard. Babysteps. The therapist is really helping a lot."

Janet looked over to Aubrey, she shook her head. "No can do. I have a paper to finish, but thanks for inviting me." Pizza Girl, Aubrey and Hannah walked to the front door, each giving Janet a hug and thanking her for the wonderful time. Once they were gone, Janet was left alone with Darcy.

"Darce, I can get that stuff, don't worry about it." Darcy was already elbow deep in soapy water, carefully washing all the serving platters and dishes they had used. Janet looked around in awe. All the leftovers were already in Tupperware containers ready for storage in the fridge. She had wiped down the counters and the dining table. "When did you…? How did you… how did you do all this so fast?" Apparently, Darcy could give Allison Rowen a run for her money.

"Oh! I'm sorry; maybe I should have asked if it was okay to…" Janet waved it away as nonsense.

"No, not at all! I'm just in awe of how quickly you cleaned everything up! I'm going to just…" Janet looked around; there was nothing left to do in the house. "I'm just going to go outside and wipe down the table and then I will be in to help you dry those. Thanks so much Darcy!"

"Oh? The table in the backyard? Emily wiped that up when we moved inside. It's all set. Why don't you sit down and relax. I have never hosted a party or anything, but it looks like it was exhausting. You want me to pour you a glass of lemonade or something? I noticed some in the fridge."

"Darcy, you're incredible." Janet sat at the little kitchen table and smiled over at Ikey's new girlfriend. She could tell he was over the moon for her, and Janet was starting to see why. "So Darce, you don't mind if I call you Darce, do you? Tell me all about you and Ikey and what you love about him!" Janet leaned forward putting her elbows on her knees and readied herself for juicy gossip.

Darcy took a deep breath and told Janet everything she could, glossing over the juicer details (much to Janet's disgust) but essentially giving Janet a good picture of what a sweet man Ikey could be. "And then he just held me. He brushed my hair out of my face, set his alarm to remind him when I should take more medicine. He was amazing. Before we started dating, I never knew a guy could be so kind and loving." Darcy was done washing the dishes and had poured herself a glass of lemonade. She and Janet sat at the tiny table in the kitchen; Darcy really liked having a girlfriend to talk to. She didn't grow up in Knights Ridge and had moved here to get away from an abusive ex. Her parents were not really sympathetic as she had run off with said ex-boyfriend in the first place. She pretty much kept to herself and mostly went home to watch sports on TV or read a good book. She had met Eddie soon after she decided it was time to get back on the saddle and try dating again. Disastrous as the outcome had been (she didn't know about his reputation until it was too late) it had brought her the opportunity to get to know Ikey later, so in all, it turned out okay.

Janet reached across the table and took her hand. "Wow Darcy. I had no idea you had been through so much. I think you're incredibly strong and an amazing person to have gone through what you have gone through and still have a place in your heart willing to try for love again. I really admire you. I'm also so sorry that Eddie caused you pain in any way."

Touched by her compliment, tears formed in Darcy's eyes, drawing in a deep breath, trying to keep them from falling, she replied. "It's not your place to apologize for Eddie's actions. Besides, he did that already. You've made him a better person Janet, he's really lucky to have found you."

"And I'm lucky to have found him." Janet sincerely meant this. They talked some more about all kinds if things. Janet learned a lot about Darcy that day and made a point of reaching out to her again, so maybe they could continue this friendship.

* * *

A little over an hour had passed since Darcy and Janet sat down to talk, they moved to the living room to curl up on the couch and chat in more comfort. That's how Eddie and Ikey found them when they came in the door. Eddie had used his key to let them in. Ikey just looked at him and raised an eyebrow. Eddie told him to shut-it. The first thing they noticed when they walked in was how empty it was, except for the two women with tears of laughter in their eyes, rolling around on the couch having a ball. Janet was the first to notice their arrival. She jumped up and launched herself at Eddie.

"Heeeeeeey! Did you have a good day? We had a blast. Ikey, you must keep this one! She's got a brain! She's got a great sense of humor, and did I mention the brain part?" Janet and Darcy were laughing again. She had really loosened up since they started talking.

Eddie reached around her and pulled her closer, giving her a deep passionate kiss that was so telling, that she almost melted right there on the spot. "Hey yourself. Got a little buzz going right now, don't ya?" He was smiling at her. She was usually quite happy and very frisky when she was drunk. Suddenly all Eddie wanted was to be alone with her.

"Hey Darce, you have a good time?" Ikey walked over to Darcy and bent to give her a quick kiss on the cheek, not to be outdone, she yanked him down and he tumbled on the couch next to her. She then gave him a proper-promise-filled kiss that made Ikey think that an afternoon "nap" was in order.

Eddie cleared his throat and Ikey got the hint, right away. Not that he had intended to stay any longer anyway. It was clear from that kiss that Darcy was feeling much better today and was ready to go home. Gathering her purse and platter, Darcy gave Janet a quick hug and murmured a thank you as she left hand in hand with Ikey.

"They're so cute together." Janet commented after closing the door. "It was such a good time Eddie. The girls all hit it off. That Emily is a hoot. You know…" Janet was cut off by the most delicious kiss. Eddie stopped abruptly, looked at her and then cast his eyes down in concentration. He started working his way down her buttons, kissing her exposed flesh after opening each one on that gauzy shirt of hers. She had opted for a white lace bra instead of the camisole after their morning romp and it was so sexy, he couldn't keep his mind on anything else during his time away from her. He was desperate to get her out of these clothes again and make slow lazy love all afternoon. She didn't have to work tonight so he was planning on taking full advantage of that. She started making little sighs as she often did when she was getting aroused. He was kissing her and roaming his hands all over her as if he hadn't seen her in months. Janet hoped this feeling, this hunger they had for each other never ended. He slipped his hands to her jeans, letting them roam around her bottom before coming back to the front and unbuttoned them expertly. She heard that slow rasp of her zipper and immediately got wet in anticipation of what was coming next. He tugged her jeans down her legs and was just reaching her core with his fingers when they heard a loud rap on the door. Eddie's head snapped up like a lion being interrupted from feeding. Janet simply planned on ignoring it. Closing her eyes again, she let her head fall back to wait for the pleasure she was sure he would give her. But the knocked sounded again, this time more insistent. Janet rolled her eyes; if she knew her Eddie, he was going to lose it in t-minus three seconds.

"fuck, Fuck, FUCK!" Eddie laid his head on her stomach and drew in a few ragged breaths. At some point they had ended up on the floor, not even making it to the couch. Eddie said another round of expletives while Janet started buttoning her blouse back up and pulling up her jeans.

"Coming, just a second!" Janet was getting off the floor, and Eddie was stomping into the bedroom. He looked at her, and called over his shoulder.

"Get rid of them. Whoever the hell it is, for Chrissakes Janet, get rid of them!" The pain in his pants was almost too much to take. He went into the room and stripped down to his boxers and waited for her on the bed.

Janet ran to the door, hoping she looked decent enough. She knew her face would be flushed and hoped the raw scent of her was not permeating through her clothes. She looked down and saw that her nipples were distended and slumped over a little to hide them. When she opened the door, she was struck speechless. Panic filled her from her head to her toes. _No, no, NO! This is not happening, not now._


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

Allison and Emily drove the first two minutes chatting about the Ridge and all the interesting things that went on during the summer. Emily regarded her and noticed the pale cast to her skin. She recalled Allison didn't have any of the mimosas and that she barely ate anything during the brunch. In fact it looked like she might puke at any given minute.

"So, how far along are you? I assume since Janet offered you a drink, no one knows yet?"

Surprise flickered across Allison's face. "Nothing gets past you, eh?"

"Not really. So? Is this a good thing?" Emily had been filled in at the brunch about all the goings on in the Ridge. That included Allison and Janet's infidelities, the Nick/Hannah/Big Cat situation and the whole Phil being a shut-in thing. And people thought small towns were dull, ha!

"I think so. Owen and I are trying so hard for our marriage to survive. He told me he wants it to work and we are going strong right now… but part of me wonders if he's really just doing what he thinks he should be doing, for the kids and the baby. I mean, how can he forgive me for what I've done?" Allison shook her head in confusion. Her brows were knitted in worry.

Emily reached across the seat and grabbed her free hand, giving it a quick squeeze. "We're all human beings, and we all make mistakes. As far as I see it, Owen had a choice. He had a choice whether or no he was going to forgive you or move on. He chose to forgive you. End of story. We make mistakes; we make choices; that's life. He's with you because he chooses to be. He loves you from what I hear and have seen. He's also a family man; in his case, they both kinda go together, making him who he is. Maybe you shouldn't try to distinguish one from the other. He's the man you love because of the way he is with you and the kids, so is it really fair to want his reasons for getting back with you to be based solely on you? I don't know if I'm making any sense here. Besides, what the hell do I know? I've only ever been in one serious relationship and it was all fucked up anyway. Oops, sorry, potty mouth… that's what my mother always says to me." Emily laughed at herself. Allison had just pulled in front of the Garret house, shifting the car in park she turned to Emily.

"Thanks so much. You made a lot of sense actually…" Allison would have to give it some more thought. She had made a hell of a lot of sense. She started wringing her hands and continued, "I…I really had a good time today Emily. This was like my first time ever hanging out with Janet and Hannah and all the rest of them. I was glad I wasn't the only newbie around, having you and Darcy there really helped me feel more comfortable. I've been kinda lonely, so it was nice to have girl chat and just relax, be myself. I've felt like such a pariah since the whole affair became public, and rightly so, but still, it's been hard and lonely and… well, thanks for being you!" In an uncharacteristic Allison moment, she went on impulse and awkwardly hugged Emily. Emily reached up and gave her back a quick soothing rub up and down her back then pulled away to look her in the eye.

"Remember Allison, we all make mistakes, and we have a choice as to how long we let people punish us for them. Don't punish yourself too much longer, it's over and you're sorry. And for God's sake, don't let anyone else punish you any longer either. Okay?"

Allison nodded her head, getting slightly weepy. Emily opened her door, slid out and sashayed up the walk to the Garret house. Getting to the door, she turned around and waved to Allison and yelled out, "Let's do lunch sometime this week, okay? You can bring your crumb-snatchers with you!" She turned and went inside, leaving Allison with a new sense of confidence. She felt like she had made a new friend, someone who didn't judge her so harshly for what she had done. Someone who understood that having lunch with her meant she had to bring her kids…how cool. Smiling, she turned on her radio, took out the nursery rhymes cd and flipped through the stations, looking for the loudest most upbeat song she could find. For the rest of her short drive home, she didn't want to be mommy or Mrs. Rowen, she just wanted to be Allison.

* * *

Eddie sat on the bed and seriously considered taking "care" of himself. _What the hell was taking her so long?_ The pain from his hard-on would not be ignored. He would either lose it from neglect or get rid of it his damn self. Fully disgusted now, he swings his legs over the side of the bed and stalks to the bedroom door. Hearing a conversation going on Eddie throws his hands up in the air, but the closer he gets to the door, he realizes the other voice is male. Shaking his head, he figures it must be one of the guys looking for him. Just in case it isn't, Eddie pulls his jeans up over his legs and carelessly half zips them up, turning the bedroom doorknob. When he opens the bedroom door, he freezes. A red haze goes over his eyes.

The anger at seeing Rooster in Janet's house, their love den; well it causes him to snap. You see, Eddie is a sensible man. He even considers himself a smart man. He knew from the moment Janet told her about sleeping with this chicken hawk, that he had to stay away, give him a wide berth. Because if Eddie ever found himself in a position where he could really show Rooster how angry he was? Well, he'd probably end up killing him, literally killing him. And now, after things had been going so well, it was like fate had stepped in and said, "uh-uh, not you Latekka, take two steps back. Happiness just isn't in the cards for you." Well, Eddie would be damned if he was going to let fate do that to him and he would also be damned if he was going control himself today. After staring at them for almost 10 seconds, Eddie was at the door with his hands gripped around Rooster's neck lifting him a few inches form the ground, the anger he felt could not be contained one second longer. He saw the raw fear in Roosters eyes, the pleading, and then the defeat and acceptance of his fate. Roosters eyes started to water, his legs dangled slightly and his mouth lay open trying to catch one last blessed breath. Eddie could feel Janet's fingers trying to pry his hands off this assholes neck. He looked over at her wondering what she could have possibly been thinking and saw the fear in her eyes. She was talking to him, but he couldn't hear her. Still slowly squeezing the life out of Rooster, Janet's words started to bleed through.

"Eddie… don't… regret…. can't… Eddie, please…. for me… stop. Eddie, you're going to kill him! EDDIE, STOP! YOU'RE KILLING HIM. YOU'RE NOT THIS PERSON. EDDIE, IT WAS MY FAULT. DON'T DO THIS! PLEASE, I LOVE YOU. EDDIE, I LOVE YOU….I LOVE YOU…." He heard her, and his grip loosed and Rooster slid to the floor, barely conscious and in a whole lot of pain. Eddie looked down at him. _Jesus, what did I almost do?_ Rooster lay on the floor, gasping, drawing in air, rubbing his neck. There were angry bruises already apparent from where Eddie had been holding him around the neck. Eddie couldn't look at Janet afraid he would still see the fear, or worse, shame in her eyes, so instead he addressed the lump on the floor.

"What the fuck are you doing here Russo?" Eddie's voice was so low, it scared even Janet. Everyone knew the softer he spoke, the angrier he was. Rooster opened his mouth to speak, but the words got lodged in his throat, the pain was still very fresh.

"I…ahem…. I" he took some deep breaths and tried again. "I was coming to say goodbye, to tell Janet…to tell her I was sorry again. I'm leaving Knight's Ridge and I just wanted to say goodbye to someone who I love with all I have." Rooster shot him a look as if to dare him to try it again. Eddie was so fast; he grabbed him by the front of his Hawaiian shirt and hauled him to a standing position. Rooster winced and prepared himself for the fists he feared for months. Instead, Eddie spoke again, quietly.

"You dare….you dare come here and declare your love for my woman? Haven't you learned anything, don't you have one fucking iota of sense in that overly processed head of yours?" Eddie let him go with a shove and Rooster flew back to the wall. He banged into it, causing a picture of Janet, Hannah and Sam to go crashing to the floor.

"Eddie…" Janet started with a warning tone.

"NO! NO JANET, YOU DO NOT GET TO DICTATE THIS!! WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING HERE??" Eddie was so angry, he wants to punch something but instead he keeps his hands coolly trained to his side. He damn near wants to throw her out the window for letting this asshole in the front door, not only today, but those many months ago. Calming himself down he tells himself that he loves Janet and that he can handle this. He repeats this mantra over and over in his head. _I love this woman, I can handle this. I love this woman, I can handle this. I love this woman, I can handle this._ He takes a breath and starts again looking at Janet while he speaks. "I have shown and un-Godly amount of restraint for the last few months when it comes to this piece of shit, so give me a minute, Godammnit!" Eddie runs his hands through his hair in frustration, he's so fucking angry. He turns and punches the wall instead; his fist goes right through the drywall. Bracing himself against the wall, he takes another breath. Feeling a little better, he turns and looks at Rooster. He raises his eyebrow as if to ask him, _what the hell are you still doing here?_

"You know Latekka; I believe now that you love Janet. I didn't believe that before. I just thought you were using her and I made it my business to make sure she always knew what you were up to."

"It wasn't your place to do that…" Eddie is simmering, a pot ready to boil over. Janet walks over, and puts a soothing hand on his forearm, rubbing up and down, praying to God Rooster doesn't set him off again.

"..But what I still can't understand is how you think, how you can have the audacity to think, that there was never anyone else out there who realized, way before you for that matter, what a wonderful loving person she is? I know what I did was wrong, what we did… but it doesn't change the fact that I was in love with her and I fucked up, end of story. Sorry you got caught in the cross hairs, but most men can be dumber than dirt when it comes to women and love. In my case, it was ever thinking she would love me back, and in yours…" he paused and looked at him with pity, "it was waiting too long to tell her and not be ashamed of it." Smoothing his shirt out and giving his neck one more rub, Rooster turned to face Janet. "I'll always care and love you; I gotta work at falling out of love with you. When that happens, I'll drop you a line, let you know how I'm doing. I'm gonna miss you, you've always, well… you always made me feel like I mattered. I'm just so sorry things had to end this way. I hope one day we can rebuild our friendship and make it stronger than it was before all of this happened." Turning to Eddie who was still mulling over his words, "Latekka, be good to her. She has the biggest heart I know, and you are so fucking lucky and undeserving of it, but you got it anyway. Don't fuck it up." And with that, Rooster walked out the door, hands massaging his neck on the way out.

Eddie stared at Rooster's retreating form. _The stones on this guy!_ But what he had said hit a little too close to home. Eddie had taken her for granted, had assumed she would wait till he hashed out his feelings and his issues, and in the meantime, she was growing more and more insecure with their relationship, leading up to that debacle… well, it was over now. Done. Rubbing his arm up and down, soothing his hurts and reassuring him without words, Janet made Eddie feel better. With this small gesture, she was telling him that she was his and he was hers and no one would come between that ever again. Her eyes told him that it didn't matter that Rooster still walked around, living and breathing. She had given her heart to Eddie so long ago, and it was his for as long as he wanted it. Janet looked at Eddie, pleadingly. Shoulders slumping, he nodded his head once. She ran out the front door shouting after Rooster.

"Rooster! ROOSTER! WAIT!" When she was face to face with him she grabbed him and pulled him to her in a warm hug. "I'm so sorry about not considering your feelings again. Good luck, and please, keep in touch with me. I'll miss you too. I'll check on your mom for you every now and again, okay?" Rooster's arms came around her, breathing in her scent. He dared not move his hands in fear that Eddie would actually kill him this time. Instead, he did the hardest thing imaginable, he gently pushed her away. Holding her at arms length, he finally gave her one of his smiles. They stood, smiling at each other another few seconds before he gave her shoulders one final squeeze and walked to his car.

Starting the car up, he rolled down the window and leaned out. "I wish you all the happiness in the world Janet. You deserve it. You know, I really meant what I said in there… you do have the biggest heart of anyone I know. He doesn't deserve you, but you deserve to have anything your heart desires. And if that's Eddie Latekka, then, I wish you a long life, marriage and many babies." He kisses his fingers, then blows her a kiss. With a wink and final wave, he drives off.

Eddie stands in the doorway, watching the whole thing play out and has to shake his head with a smiles, thinking to himself, _the guy's got some stones, I have to at least give him that._ Waiting in the doorway for Janet, he holds out his hand to her. When she reaches him, she takes it.

"I'm sorry. I lost it… it was all too much. I tried so hard Janet. I stayed clear of him on purpose because I knew, _I knew_, it would be like that. Jesus, I could have killed him, you know? Scared the shit out of me when I realized what I almost did. But your voice, it got through to me. I don't think I have honestly ever been that angry, I mean it was blind rage. The stones, the absolute stones, I kept thinking; to come here, after I was trying to make my place here again…It got me so tuned up, you know? And I snapped." Eddie shrugged his shoulders as if there was nothing he could have done to stop it. "But he said some things there that gave me pause and I just want you to know that… well, I'm so sorry again, I should have never…" Janet put her fingers to his lips.

"Eddie, I'm just glad Rooster is okay, and that you didn't hurt him too badly. What I'm happier about is the fact that we're okay. I love you Eddie, and I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. Rooster and I made peace months ago and well, we haven't exactly been hanging out, but we made our peace. I never mentioned that because things weren't really the same between me and him anyway and I knew bringing it up would get you steamed. But we made our peace and it looked like today, you at least were able to make a little peace with what happened as far as he was concerned too." She looked at him searchingly, trying to gauge whether or not this was indeed the case. He nodded and squeezed her hand a little bit more.

She tugged at his hand to pull him towards the bathroom in her bedroom. He followed the emotion of it all finally catching up to him and zapping him of all energy. She started pulling bandages and antiseptic from the medicine cabinet. He hadn't noticed until then that his knuckles were pretty bruised and bleeding some. She wiped at the tiny abrasions gently blowing as she went along, to keep the sting from hurting so much. She was so caring; she really did have the biggest heart of anyone he knew. And he knew how damned lucky he was to have her. He said the first thing that came into his mind.

"You're going to be a great mom to our children one day Janet. I can't wait to see you with them." Her reaction was swift, she shot her glance up to him and they held eyes for a few seconds. The look in his eyes stole her breath away. She gave a tiny smile and went back to cleaning his cuts.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

Emily sat cross legged on the guest bed in the Garrett home, her mother sat opposite her. Finally they had the place to themselves and would be able to chit-chat. Leslie reached across and smoothed back a braid from her face, more wanting to touch her daughter than it needing to actually be moved. Emily smiled, her mom was affectionate, a toucher, and Emily had inherited that trait as well.

"He's so different from Daddy." Leslie immediately got ready to defend Robert, but Emily put a calming hand on her knee. "Not in a bad way, they're just so different. I mean Daddy held a doctorate and traveled in such different circles Mommy, and so do you. But the two of you are so easy together, you have a good chemistry, you flow. It's cool to see." Emily paused again, not quite sure if she should continue. "You know. I didn't understand, I mean I was damn near 19 years old, but I didn't understand why you were divorcing him. He was happy, I was happy, but you weren't, were you?"

Leslie had always hoped that with time and age, Emily would finally understand her side of things, it looked like that day had finally come. "No baby, I wasn't happy. Your father was very distant; you had never seen us argue or fight, because he just wouldn't. You had to care enough to do that and it just wasn't in William to do that. He was great with you and I stayed for far too many years just so you wouldn't be disrupted. So when you went away to college, I asked for a divorce. I couldn't stay in a loveless marriage one second more. Then the cancer came and he didn't make it through. It was so horrible and I always felt like it left a terrible mark on yours and my relationship." Emily nodded in understanding, it had for her. She always felt her mother asking for a divorce even though it was before they knew about the cancer was wrong. Eve though Leslie had helped William through his chemo and held his hand when he was transitioning (that's what they called it in Hospice anyway) she still blamed her mother. It took a long time for her to forgive her after he passed. But deep down, Emily knew their marriage wasn't a happy one, she just didn't want to admit it. So now, her and her mother had a fresh start, and it was impossible not to see how much in love her and Robert were.

"Well, he's certainly a good man, and adores you to pieces Mom. I mean, a real gentleman. Real cool. I bet he was a real bad-ass back in his day." Leslie smiles at her daughters' colorful language.

"I'm guessing he was. A little bit of that 'bad-ass' shows up everyone now and again. I love him Em. I really do. I'm scared, but it's too strong for me to run from this. He's what I have always imagined love should be like." Emily looked stricken, a fleeting emotion that quickly was disguised. Leslie took her hand and rubbed it soothingly. "It doesn't make what your father and I had any less important to me. We didn't love each other in the end, but in the beginning, when we made you, we at least thought it was love. And I don't regret, not one second of that time, because we got you out of the deal, okay?" Emily threw her arms around her mother and they hugged. She had read her emotions so well, always had. But it still never ceased to amaze Emily. Mothers, she thought, were just about the coolest thing to ever exist on the face of the Earth.

* * *

Hannah, Aubrey and Pizza Girl walked the first few block giggling and chatting. Aubrey turned off to go in one direction and Pizza Girl and Hannah kept on going straight.

"You and Janet handled each other well today." She looked over at Hannah, who had a perpetual look of sadness on her countenance ever since Janet pulled out of the wedding.

"Yeah, we had sort of an unwritten agreement to bury the hatchet for today. I miss her. We just haven't been able to gel too well lately. It's awkward. She won't come over the house anymore. No one in the gang is really speaking to me. If I run into Eddie, he's…"

"Hostile?" Pizza Girl supplied.

"No, actually, it's more like disgust laced with a heavy serving of disappointment. But Nick, he's the worst. He's so angry with me for staying, but at the same time, he keeps trying to tell me he's there, if I need him, whenever I'm ready to walk away."

"And do you want to walk away Hannah?"

"No, not really, I mean, sometimes I do. I have doubts at times, but that's normal right? I mean, Ray's been there, always. He's constant, I can depend on him. He won't….leave… me." She finished lamely.

"True enough, but he's also a bad person Hannah." Pizza Girl held up her hand to ward off any objection. "Listen Hannah, I'm all for standing by my man, but when it comes to the committing of crimes? I think that's when I would have to walk away. I mean, who needs that type of drama. I just can't understand how you can be so blind to all the things he's done and continues to do. To use Janet's words, Big Cat is a slime. If you marry him, you might want to get used to this feeling of being on the outside looking in, because, my friend, and outsider you will become." Pizza Girl tapped her shoulder lightly and turned to head towards Gelsen.

* * *

Ikey liked Darcy's place. He noticed how the sun seemed to shine through it so brightly. He loved that her bedroom was all white; lacy curtains, crisp white sheets, fluffy down comforter. It was sexy and inviting, and so conducive to a good night's sleep. He had spent the night at her place a total of two times, and both nights were some of the best of his life. He knew it was early and they hadn't been seeing each other long, but he could feel those tugs on his heartstrings and knew he was sinking, fast for this woman.

"Penny for your thoughts?" She had that sleepy satisfied look on her face, the one that usually was the result of love-making. When they reached her apartment door, Ikey started in on her. Kissing her neck with his hands on her hips, while she fumbled for the key. She was so overcome and distracted by his touch that he reached around her and took the key from her hands. Instead of opening the door, he turned her to him and leaned in so close she was amazed he didn't pop right out the back of her. Feather kisses all over her face and saying her name the whole time. _"Darcy, you're so beautiful, Darcy, I'm so lucky. I want to make love to you, will you let me do that? Make slow love to you?"_ She all but melted at the memory. And here they were laying side by side, facing each other, foreheads touching, trying to calm thier breathing after such an intense… workout.

"I was just thinking how much I like being here, with you. How much I already feel for you and we've barely been seeing each other a month. It's weird, but it feels right. I don't know. I probably shouldn't have said that, now I'm going to go and scare you off." He chuckled self-consciously.

She reached her hand out and put it on his cheek. "I feel the same way Ikey. I… you've been… you've been so wonderful and I am really enjoying all of this."

"Darce, are we exclusive? I mean, are you seeing anyone else? Dating?" This question took her by surprise. Stupid as it was, she assumed they were, but then, that might have been a rookie assumption. Was he dating other people? "Darcy, it's not a hard question? Are you seeing other guys? You are aren't you? That's why you're hesitatin'. Oh God, I'm such an idiot." Ikey jumped up out of the bed buck naked looking for his hat. Finding it on the floor, he started looking for his clothes. He needed his hat, always made him feel better, comfortable. Something to tug on when he was irritated or upset by things. Stunned beyond belief Darcy finally found the words to stop him. She sat up not bothering with pulling the sheets to cover herself.

"I'm not seeing anyone else Ikey, I never was. I just assumed… and then when you asked me just now, I hesitated because I thought that maybe _you_ were seeing other people. And I was blindsided for a moment. Come here, please, don't be upset." She patted the bed. Relief washed over him as he walked over to her side of the bed. Sitting down next to her, he pulled her to him, not for a kiss, but an embrace. They sat that way for a long while, simple enjoying the feel of one another.

* * *

That Sunday evening, the Garret men and the Etwood women sat around the kitchen table taking and laughing like a real family. Aubrey wasn't present, but after Emily's magic had been worked, it wouldn't have been a problem if she was. Robert cleared his throat.

"So, I got a few things to say. Uh… my cancer, it's been gone for a a little bit of time now and this beautiful woman has agreed to marry me. I have two wonderful sons and I am gaining a beautiful daughter. I feel so blessed because even when I though life was all over and I had lived all the happiness one man could ever deserve in a lifetime, God gave me more. I don't know what I did to deserve her, but she's here and says she's staying, so I'm holding her to it. We have something to ask of you three and would be honored of you'd accept. Les, why don't you start?"

Leslie turned to face Ronnie. "Ronnie, as you know, my parents passed away a long time ago. I don't have any siblings and just my one daughter. I'd be so honored if you'd walk me down the aisle to 'give' me away to your father." Stunned just about summed up Ronnie's reaction, but he managed a weak nod and then gave her one of his signature hugs. "And Emily,will you be my maid of honor?"

"Of course Mommy."

"Ahem, that leaves you Nicky…" Robert got choked up again. "…to be my best man?"

"Wow? Really Dad?" Robert nodded his head. "Yeah, of course Dad." They stood up and hugged. Settling back down to dinner they discussed the details of the upcoming wedding and continued to eat their dinner.

* * *

"So, how was the brunch?" Phil was rubbing her shoulders up and down; it was a lazy intimate caress. It always made Penny feel warm, protected and cherished.

"Enlightening."

"Hmmmm, really? And what was so enlightening?" Phil asked.

"Well, you know a bunch of women, alcohol; it almost always leads to loose tongues. And after a while, the conversation degrades to boys and sex."

"Why is it the male of the species as a topic would be a degradation?"

"Well, that's obvious isn't it? The female of the species is far superior, hence making the male inferior by default." She gave him her 'so there' look and snuggled up to him. They sat in silence for a long time, just looking up at the sun. He had done it, Dr. Griffin told him to take his girlfriend on a date in the backyard and he actually managed to do it. He was practicing all week, unbeknownst to anyone and he managed to make it as far as the back porch, down the steps and two feet onto the grass. It was slow progress, but by God, he was making it and that was all that mattered. Phil looked up and soaked healing power from the rays of sunshine streaming down on him.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Ikey turned away from the glare of the sun. _Damn, morning already._ He turns in bed to snuggle with Darcy only to find her missing. Slowly opening one eye, then the other, he looks to her side of the bed. Yup, she was up and at 'em already. Resigned that he wouldn't be getting any this morning, he moves his legs and swings them over the side of the bed. He stands up and stretches his arms over his head, totally unconscious that he's naked from the night before.

Naked and stretching with his back to her is how Darcy found him when she walked into the room. _My, oh my, there should be a law…_

"Good morning." Darcy held two coffee mugs in her hand and was leaning against the doorjamb, blatantly admiring the view. Ikey swiveled around and gave her a slow cocky grin.

"Hey there. You got something for me over there?" She smiles and nods, pleased he's happy and grateful for the coffee.

"Cream and lots of sugar, just how you like it." She can't help but notice his state of arousal. Slowly she licks her lips and prays she will make it through the day without embarrassing herself. The image of him totally naked and rock hard in her bedroom is enough to make her cum on her own at any given time.

Ikey walks toward her and takes the coffee mugs out of her hands and set them on her dresser. "I wasn't talking about the coffee Darce." He starts to loosen the tie on her bathrobe and thanks the sweet Lord that she's still naked underneath. Kissing her collarbone as he peels back the robe and drops it to the floor, Darcy sighs in relief. _Thank God._

………………………………………

Robert walked up the steps to 32 Gelsen late in the afternoon. He had actually never been to the place before, but felt it was important to come today. He held a lavender, lavender for Chrissakes, envelope in his hand that had the name written on it in pretty female handwriting. He knocked and Phil almost immediately came to the door. Dressed for the day in jeans and a t-shirt, Phil was glad he had even made the effort this morning; he hated looking like a creepy shut-in.

"Hey Phil. It's been a while."

"Commander? Oh my goodness, come on in!" Phil felt tears start to well in his eyes. He often felt bad about being housebound, but when he heard the Commander was sick and he could do no more than call, he felt horrible. Not being able to see Eddie rounded out one of the worse days of his life too. It was another reason he was determined not to be a prisoner anymore.

Robert walked in the place and looked around. Nice place, lots of potential, good bones as Caroline might have said. "So, uh, I got something for you." Phil looked shocked as Robert held out the envelope. Taking it from him and slowly opening it, the dread started seeping into his stomach.

"It's an invitation to your wedding." Phil said lamely, and hung his head. Why did this keep happening to him, and furthermore, why did the Commander come here in person just to make him feel bad.

"That's right. Leslie and I want you to come." Robert looked at him, the first time in over 5 years and felt ashamed that he had never tried to help the boy before this. He put his arm around Phil's shoulders and walked him towards the living room. "Look son, I think we need to talk…" And talk they did, for hours. Phil remembered once Owen and Ikey both saying something about the Commander being really convincing. He sat there and listened to this man talk about his fears and facing them. He talked about 'Nam and cancer and losing the love of his life. He talked about learning to live in the moment because life was precious and short and unpredictable. He talked about second chances and the miracle of finding love again. It made Phil realize that even though he had fears, they could be and should be overcome because this precious gift he had been given was being squandered every day he didn't live up to his full potential. Looking out the window as the Commander spoke Phil thought if this man could face life with a smile and face death with a 'fuck you' attitude, then he sure as hell could give it a try. He had Penny, the love of his life, and he would do this for himself and for her.

"Hey, I know you've been here a while, and probably have stuff to do, but would you mind… would you mind if we went to town and had dinner? It looks like a great day and I don't want to miss another minute. You up for a walk?" Even though the Commander had battled cancer and won so far, he still looked like he could kick some serious butt.

Slightly offended and more than amused at his complete turn-around, Robert slapped him on the shoulder. "Sounds great smart-ass. Up for a walk?" Robert snorted. "What am I, eighty? Maybe I should ask you the same, since you haven't walked more than the distance of one end of this house to the other in years! Come on son, let's give it a try." And just like that, Physical Phil Farmer, walked out the door of 32 Gelsen and into the sun. With only the briefest of hesitation, he took a deep breath and concentrated on the steady stream of conversation that so rarely came from the Commander as they walked towards Main street and the Pizza Parlor.

………………………………………

Ikey walked towards the hardware store on Main, whistling a tune. He hadn't been seeing Darcy for two months yet but was already thinking about moving in. He wondered if Darcy felt the same way. Ever since the day of that brunch, they had been inseparable. He spent one night at his place since then, just to give her a break, and both of them had been miserable. They couldn't get enough of each other, in bed or out. Half of his clothes were already at her place and his toothbrush and toiletries were there too. She bought his favorite soap and shampoo, and washed his clothes for him. He was always fixing things around her place and doing all the 'manly chores' like taking out the garbage. He had seen her at lunch today and wanted to see her again, even though it had just been 4 hours. Go figure. Turning the corner, lost in his thoughts, he bumped into the last person he'd ever expect to see walking the streets of the Ridge.

……………………………………….

Emily and Nick decided to go out for dinner at Sully's. It was a week and a half before Leslie and Robert's wedding and all the plans were running smoothly. Nick was still incredibly touched that his dad had asked him to be his best man. After leaving the way he did, for as long as he did, he never would have imagined him and his father would actually have grown closer as a result. But it seemed that was just the case, they were both more open to talking about their feelings and in general it was the kind of relationship that every father and son should have. Emily interrupted his thoughts.

"So cutie-pie, I've been here for like two and a half weeks and I haven't noticed your fine ass going out on any dates. What_ goes on_ with that?" Emily loved trying out the Ridge lingo. She seemed to get a kick out of it, every time. She had started saying snippity-loo all the time too. The Commander always looked like he wanted to hug her when she did. He and Emily had really hit it off. Turns out he always wanted a little girl. Go figure. But the relationship seemed to be mutually beneficial as Emily had been missing a father figure in her life. The Commander had even able to get her to change her clothes and 'cover up' a time or two. She would just smile indulgently and bask in the fact that he was worried about defending her virtue. She seemed to find it amusing that he thought she had a virtue to defend as it were and she just pain old didn't seem to mind.

Nick sighed. "Someone once told me there was a limited menu in the Ridge. Turns out; it's true." He shrugged thinking of Hannah Jane. They walked over to the bar, opting to visit with Janet while they ate.

Janet was standing at her usual spot, drying pint glasses. "Hey guys, what goes on?" Emily smiled at Janet, she really did love that phrase!

"Hey Janet." Nick smiled at her. Eddie and Janet finally seemed to be at peace within their relationship again and the damn fool was always smiling and whistling at work as a result. A happy Eddie was a happy work environment; Nick knew that much for sure. If the guy was creased about something, everyone suffered.

"Nothing much Janet. Place sure is busy tonight, something going on?" Emily looked around the place scanning the crowd. There was a group of women towards the back whooping it up. You could tell it was a girl's night of some sort. The ringleader of the crew had long wavy black hair and a curvy body to go with it. She was stacked and leggy, _damn her_, and had a sleepy look to her eyes that men would think made her look sultry. Unlike a lot of women in the Ridge, Emily noted this woman was high maintenance; designer jeans, expensive shoes, stylish blouse. Her hair was definitely done by a professional and she would bet her savings it wasn't Regina's Cut and Curl in town. No, she probably made the drive to Boston every few weeks to keep up that 'do. She smiled and Emily thought, oh yeah, she's a man-eater. Takes one to know one, but still, there was something a little unsettling about this woman, something she couldn't put her finger on.

"Yeah, Trishia's here with a bunch of her girlfriends, they don't usually come in here during the week. There's also a lot of students from the Duff, since classes are about to start in a few weeks. It will get more and more crowded as September draws near. It's cyclical." Janet shrugged her shoulders and started wiping down the bar. She took their orders when they were ready and they rolled into a conversation about everyday stuff while the bar got more and more crowded around them.

……………………………………….

"Phiz? Phil? PHIL??" Ikey looked at Phil and happy tears sprang to his eyes. All machismo forgotten, he embraced his friend in a hug and they sat there holding each other laughing. Ikey finally let go and said, "But dude, how? When?" It seemed at that moment he finally noticed the Commander standing next to him. Everything making sense now, Ikey nodded his head.

"Turns out you guys were right," Phil rocked back and forth on the heels of his feet, "The Commander can be really convincing."

……………………………………….

Janet placed the hot wings, nachos and stuffed potatoes in front of Nick and Emily. Emily figured if she was going to eat out, she was going to eat bad! As they were digging in, she heard people greeting Eddie and turned to see him and maybe flirt a little; just to get Janet's goat. Instead of seeing Eddie first, she got her first glance at who she would come to learn was Steve. He was tall, not as tall as Eddie, but damn near, and he was in a cop's uniform. Her mouth watered and she almost danced a jig. A man in uniform, hot damn! Built like a linebacker, he walked across the bar towards her and Nick, chatting. He hadn't looked her way yet; she was dying to get a look at those eyes. Before he made it over to them, man-eater Trishia intercepted; she wrapped her arms around his waist, making sure to fit every curve of her body against him and pulled his head down for a slow intimate kiss. _Well shit. There goes that._ Just as she was about to turn around Emily saw his arms come up, but instead of embracing her, he was pushing her away. Curious now, Emily kept on watching as he frowned down at Trishia, murmured something to her and gently moved her aside tocatch up with Eddie and the rest of them at the bar.

"Trishia's up to her old tricks again, eh Steve?" Frustrated Steve ran a hand over his bald head and nodded. Eddie walked around the bar and gave Janet a kiss as if he hadn't seen her in days. Steve waited until the private moment passed before answering her.

"As usual Janet. I was just getting off work when I ran into Eddie. He convinced me to come in to have a beer, even though he knows I don't drink." He smiled and looked to his left and if anyone had asked him at that time what his name was, he wouldn't have been able to say. She was sitting there olive skirt riding high and falling carelessly over the side of the bar stool. He legs were crossed intimately towards Nick, her ankle bracelet glinting off the light, and she was laughing at something he said. She leaned in to him and whispered something in his ear to make him laugh back. When she leaned forward, he caught site of what he was sure were to be the most gloriously full breasts. He was a breast and a thigh man, he'd admit it, shallow, but he couldn't seem to help it. She finally looked up and their eyes locked for just a moment. She gave him a knowing smile, slowly fluttered her eyes and turned her attention back to Nick.

"So, what did you want to drink Steve?" Janet was giving him a look; she knew exactly what Steve had been thinking about. He felt guilty because obviously this was a new girl Nick was dating and he had just got caught ogling her.

"I'll have a ginger ale Janet, and might as well eat something, how about some wings and fries?" She scribbled down the order and walked away towards the kitchen.

"Don't feel bad man."

"About what?"

"Ogling Emily; we all had that reaction when we first met her, " Eddie looked around to make sure Janet wasn't there, but just to be safe, he pulled Steve closer and lowered his voice, "including me. The woman just oozes sex from her pores!"

"Well, she sure is easy on the eyes, I'll tell you that much. How long have her and Nick been seeing each other? I haven't seen her around here before." Steve tried to keep the bitterness out of his tone. He really needed to get out more, there was a beautiful new woman in town and he hadn't even known about it until it was too late. Him and Trishia were so over. He realized how one-sided their relationship had been once he put some distance between them. She was selfish and shallow and was certainly not the type of woman he'd want to marry or have children with. That prospect made him sad, he really did want to settle down, live the American dream, wife, pet, two kids and the little house on the water. He had the house, and was thinking about the pet, but the other two just seemed to elude him.

Eddie blinked twice in surprise. "Emily and Nick?" Eddie reared back his head and started laughing. "That's Nick's sister!" It was Steve's turn to blink in surprise. "Well, soon to be step-sister. She's the Dean's daughter, here from Chicago. They're not seeing each other at all. Too weird. But they have hit it off. Anyway, Emily is just that girl, you know, the touching kind. I think you should go for it. I'll introduce you, but be warned man, she's a pistol!"

Eddie cleared his throat and patted Nick on the shoulder, "Excuse me guys. Hey Emily, this is my friend Steve…"

………………………………….

A little later that evening, Eddie and Janet snuck off to the backroom that doubled as storage and locker room. It was busy, but it was also time for her break and she decided she was going to use every 15 minutes of it, maybe more if she got lucky. She was wearing a skirt today, something she had never done at work before. It wasn't short, but it was flirty, mid-calf and floral.

Eddie watched Janet from behind as she held his hand and led him into the backroom. Her dressy lycra t-shirt fit her so well that Eddie couldn't get his mind off it all day. He watched her get dressed this morning in an electric blue bra and panty set that nearly made him swallow his tongue. Once he saw it, he figured they could be a little late going into work, but she claimed she had errands and he needed to get into the office. She smiled sweetly and promised him that later would be better. Well it damn well was later and he sure wasn't waiting till they got home tonight. Readying himself for any resistance (Janet was always self-conscious about quickies in public places) he turned to close the door. To his surprise she was the one to lock it behind them. Janet backed Eddie into the wall and started pulling at his jeans. She pulled his head down to meet her and started to nibble and kiss her way all over his lips and chin. Her other hand had managed to get his jeans open and was working to pull them down. His hand roamed all over her, hiking her skirt up, feeling for the band of her underwear. When he couldn't find it, he froze. He ran his hands all over her bare bottom and found his way to the front of her and inside her. The both sighed with pleasure.

She smiled at him, giving him a naughty look, "I took them off about a half hour ago hoping we'd get a chance to sneak away." The thought of her walking around the bar, bare-assed was almost his undoing. Rock hard with need, Eddie hoisted her up and plunged into Janet. The union was so heated, so quick he just about lost his mind inside of her. Panting quietly so as not to be overheard, Eddie thought to himself, _there is nothing in this world that would ever make me leave this woman._

…………………………………...

Trishia watched Steve get introduced to that new girl she had been seeing around town. Rolling her eyes she tried to focus on what her girlfriends were saying. She didn't want Steve anymore, that much was true, but she did enjoy going out and having Steve as a boyfriend made that convenient. He made decent money and had some huge inheritance from his parents, so he lived quite comfortably. He would take her places she would have never experienced on her own and he loved going to Boston, just because. He used to pay for her hair and nails to get done, and she was really missing that. The sparks between them had been great, but she just wasn't looking for commitment, not if it ended with marriage and kids. He told her he loved her and she damn near threw up. Ugh. Love always led to talk about marriage and babies and damned if she was going to ruin her figure carrying around some baby that would cry all the time and need her for stuff. No, she just wanted to have fun and she knew if she worked on Steve hard enough, she would get him to see that her way was much better. Cutting her eyes to the new girl one last time, she vowed to set her plan in motion soon. Let him have his fun, for now.

…………………………………….

Eddie lowered Janet slowly to the floor, vowing not to drop her, despite his exhaustion. Even though it was quick, it was intense, and her taking the lead like that, well it just about destroyed him. She looked at him and smirked. She knew exactly the power she had over him; he shook his head as if to agree.

Pulling her skirt down she ran over to her locker and fished out her panties that were in her purse. Eddie moaned. If it were humanly possible to take her again, he would. Unfortunately his body wasn't in agreement. She grabbed a couple of Kleenex for herself and for him. Shoving the few in his hands she snapped at him.

"Stop standing there half naked, pull yourself together! I swear, you're gonna get us caught! And my break is over buddy, so you're going to have to recover on the bar stool!" Janet knew Eddie liked to veg out after sex; it was almost as if his life force was sucked out of him or something.

"Can't move. You just about killed me." Cleaning himself up, he pulled his boxers and pants back up and tossed the tissue in a plastic shopping bag Janet held out. She tied it up and threw it all in the wastebasket, hopefully hiding any evidence. She rummaged in her locker again and came out with a can of Lysol. She sprayed the room, trying to get rid of the sex scent she was sure clung in the air. Eddie just laughed at her. Amazing. She really was one of a kind.

Grabbing his hand, much as she had done earlier, she led him back out to the bar area and he slipped back onto his bar stool as if he had never been gone. He noticed immediately that Steve and Emily were gone, but Nicky was there, smirking at him.

"Janet have a good break?" Nick hadn't looked up from his beer.

"What? Huh? Yeah, yeah, she had a good break. You know we were talking in the back, she wanted to er… uhm, put her legs up for a bit, relax."

Nick snorted. He was pretty sure she had put her legs up. "Yeah, I'll just bet." Eddie tried not to look guilty, but was sure he was doing a lousy job of it. Janet, however, was slinging beers and filling orders. You would have never guessed she had just been having dirty sex in the backroom. Trying for a change in subject, Eddie asked Nick about the couple on the dance floor.

"So…?" Pointing his chin towards them.

"He was sunk two minutes into the conversation. She flirted and teased, touched him… you know how she does. Man, he was thrown. She was the one that asked him to dance. Been out there for about two songs now. In fact, I was just about to go put on one for her. She told me in my ear if they made it to three make sure I put something good and slow on the juke." Nick got up and wandered across the room. Searching through the selections, he smiled when he saw the perfect one.

The song ended and just when Emily was going to excuse herself, she heard the keening first cry of Prince's Adore. _Oh damn, no way in hell I'm walking away now._ She sighed and just about melted into Steve. They had danced to a few upbeat songs; keeping a casual distance, but Prince always called for contact. You can't _not_ think about sex when listening to Prince. And sex involved touching; using this as her excuse, she pressed herself into him, as close as she could get.

_Baby, yes  
Until the end of time  
I'll be there 4 U  
U own my heart and mind  
I truly adore U  
If God one day stroke me blind  
Your beauty I'd still see  
Love is 2 weak 2 define  
Just what U mean 2 me_

Steve prayed that he wouldn't get a hard-on and ruin everything. She stole all words from him. They hadn't even talked the whole time, just danced, and moved together in rhythm to the music. But when he heard Prince come on, if she hadn't made that first move for contact, he sure as heck would have. She smelled fantastic and felt even better. She was short, but he didn't mind that. He could feel her breasts pressing against his chest and her hips moving in slow sync with the baseline of the music. She moved her hands down to his waist, just far enough to let him know she might just go there. He schooled himself not to do the same, because he knew he would definitely go there given the chance.

_From the first moment I saw U  
Ooh, I knew U where the 1  
That night I had 2 call U  
I was rappin' till the sun came up  
Tellin' U just how fine U look  
In a word, U were sex  
All of my cool attitude U took  
My body was next  
U made love 2 me  
Like U where afraid  
Was U afraid of me?  
Was I the first?  
Was I your every fantasy?  
_

He looked at her then, deep in her eyes and he fell. Just that quickly it was like he knew that this woman was going to be the only woman to ever matter in his life. Everyone that came before her was just practice for this, the real thing. He didn't know why he knew, he just did. And it scared the hell out of him.

_That's why  
Until the end of time  
I'll be there 4 U  
U own my heart and mind  
I truly adore U  
If God one day stroke me blind  
Your beauty I'd still see  
Love is 2 weak 2 define  
Just what U mean 2 me…  
_

Emily locked eyes with Steve again, and he stole her breath away. She averted her eyes, overwhelmed with this feeling that she couldn't quite describe. Feeling the place close in on her, the music started to swell, almost like a couple reaching completion in unison. She started to back away, pull away from him, but he tightened his grip on her, as if sensing her panic. He whispered in her ear.

"Don't run from this Emily. I don't know what's going on either, but I feel it too. I'm scared, but we owe it to each other to find out what this all means, right? Don't go, please, stay with me, dance with me Emily. Come on baby." He whispered in her ears so close that she felt the tickle of his breath. He wrapped his arms around her, tighter to him, afraid she'd run. He could tell she was experiencing the same thing too; and that it scared her shitless. He felt her relax again, sway with him in tune to the music, and he let out the breath he didn't even know he was holding.

…………………………………………

A/N: If you've never heard Prince's "Adore," I encourage you to check it out. There is nothing quite like Prince, nothing at all.

look up prince adore on you tube.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

Eddie slowly opens his eyes. The sun was already shining and he can feel the warm air flowing from the windows that Janet had already opened. She loves her fresh air and prefers it even if it's warm. She knows Eddie loves the A/C so she tolerates it at night, but in the mornings, she opens the windows to "freshen up" the house. It usually lets Eddie know it's time to wake up for work. So this morning, like the countless morning in the past, he reluctantly gets out of bed and heads for the bathroom.

She was in the kitchen pouring herself a glass of juice. He leans against the doorjamb, watching her as she reaches in a drawer and pulls out a slim packet in a leather wallet. Flipping it open, she pops her pill out and reaches for her juice. Eddie has the sudden urge to slap the pill out of her hand and beg her not to take it. Shaking his head at the thought he watches as she sticks her tongue out just a little and places the pill on it. _Damn_. It wasn't supposed to be sexy, but it was and he found himself moving towards her as she swallows it.

Janet saw the movement out of the corner of her eye. He was swift and had her enveloped in his arms within the short time it took her heart to beat twice. Standing firmly behind her, he starts to nibble on her ear.

Voice still raspy from sleep, he whispers in her ear, "Good morning."

Janet is always amazed at how her heart still races at being in Eddie's embrace. The way he's holding her right at this moment is her favorite. She feels sheltered and loved, protected and cherished all at the same time. "Good morning Eddie." Turning in his arms, she pulls his head down for a deep morning kiss.

Brushing his knuckles down the side of her face, he touches his forehead to hers and breathes in her scent. His initial intention was to satisfy his arousal, but what he wants now that he has her in his arms is to simply hold her and be close to her. "God Janet… I love you so much."

"I love you too Eddie." Janet looks at him, trying to gauge whether or not something is wrong. Eddie smiles down at her and shakes his head slightly.

"Nothing's wrong, I'm just a little… I don't know. It's weird. Sometimes they way I feel for you is just so strong, it takes me by surprise and kinda knocks me over, you know?"

She nods her head in agreement. "I know, I was kinda in the same place just now. I was thinking how my heart still races sometimes just from your touch."

Nothing more was said, they just stood there, holding on to each other for a little while longer.

……………………………………

By the next morning, everyone was talking about Phil leaving the house. People of the Ridge seemed genuinely happy for him. No one, however, was happier than Pizza Girl/Penny. She had waited and hoped and prayed that he would one day be free of his self imposed prison and now it seemed he was.

"So, now that you're out and about, do I still look as good to you? I mean, your menu isn't quite as limited, my man."

Phil gave her an odd look. Funny, he had never really known her to show insecurity before. His heart softened even more, if that was at all possible, for the woman he had come to love more than life itself. Reaching towards her, he cupped her face with his hands.

"There is no one else. There can never be. I guess you just don't realize how truly stuck you are with me. I may be leaving the house, but as far as this relationship goes…I'm not going anywhere. I love you. I love you with all that I have."

Blinking rapidly, trying in vain to hold the tears at bay, Penny nodded jerkily and gave him a shaky smile.

"Thanks. Me too. I love you Phil and I am so happy for you. I really am."

"Hey, I was thinking… maybe we can go out for a walk. We could go down to the Duff." He looked down and took a deep breath. "I was thinking maybe if it's not too late… I could register for the fall, and finish up my degree, if they let me."

Now Penny couldn't contain her joy, wrapping her arms around his neck she rained kisses all over his face. "That's fantastic! Yeah!!" She clapped her hands like a schoolgirl and did a little dance. Snatching his hand, she started pulling him towards the front door, not wanting to waste another minute for his new life to begin. Phil shook his head and smiled; he really did love this woman.

……………………………………………

Since Darcy had to start work so early and they had some last minute mind blowing sex when they woke up, there was not time for her to make her usual breakfast and much needed coffee. She showered and literally ran out the door. In deference to the heat, she was wearing cut-off jean shorts and an old baby t-shirt that had more paint and stains than it had the original design on it. Despite her attire, she looked damn sexy; all legs and then pink construction boots to top it off. Whistling his way to the hardware store, he held the two cups of steaming coffee, hoping her boss would let her take a coffee break. Rounding the corner, he almost dropped the coffee at what he saw.

She was up on an extension ladder, changing out the sign that told you the sales of the week. Wearing a tool belt slung low on her hips; she was stretching with the pole, moving letters around, proficiently like she had done it many times before. Admiring the view, it took Ikey a minute to register that she had an audience; a rather large, all-male audience. Swiveling his head around, he took in the faces, Monk McGillicuddy and Sneaky Pete were among them. Narrowing his eyes in disgust, he made his way over to an even more familiar face.

In almost a deadly whisper, Ikey leans in close and says, "Nicky, what the hell are you doing here… ogling my girl?"

"Ikey!" Nick just about jumped two feet in the air, guilt spreading across his face. "Hey man! Uh… just passing by, wanted to see if uh, you know, there was some stuff going on sale that we might be able to use… at the shop…" _Lame._ That was all he could think as he barely looked his friend in the eye.

Clearing his throat, Ikey decided he tortured his good friend enough. "Well, I can understand you stopping to take in the view, it's breathtaking. But, I would just as soon not see you doin' it again… know what I mean?"

"Yeah, yeah.. I gotta run anyway, I was supposed to open this morning. See you later Ikey." With one last surreptitious glance at Darcy's ass, Nick walked away.

After about two more minutes, Darcy started to make her way down the ladder, a few of the bolder men, rushed to her aid, but were muscled out of the way by Ikey, who managed to set the coffees down and grab her hand just as she reached the bottom rung.

"Oh! Ikey! Hi!" The smile that came over her face was immediate; she flushed gently as he put his hand on the small of her back and pulled her to him, angling her head with his other hand. He intended to send a message, just in case anyone got any ideas. Feeling oddly primal, he deepened the kiss until _his_ toes damn near curled. "What was that for?" He bent down to pick up the coffees and handed her one.

"Just missed you, is all." Collecting her letters and pole, she walked back into the store, with Ikey trailing behind. Once she was out of earshot, he turned to the dwindling crowd. "I don't mind you all looking, but don't even think about touching." And with that, Ikey went into the hardware store; Darcy never being aware of what kind of an impact her sign-changing had on the poor men of the Ridge.

…………………………………………….

Steve sat in his squad car bored to tears. Sometimes he wished something would happen in this sleepy town. Working day shift in Knights Ridge usually meant traffic duty, and that's exactly what he was stuck doing now. He was parked inconspicuously off to the side of the road on Madison Street. If you were speeding, you would see his car once it was too late. Old Mrs. Burnaby complained that the "kids" were ripping down this street during all times of the day as if it were a drag race. So the Captain had set out to "do something" about it and here he was.

He heard the music well before the car came into view. Lenny Kravitz's 'American Woman' was flowing through the air. Frowning, he wondered who would be blasting music; it was such a city thing to do. Waiting, hoping they came down this street, he pulled out his speed trapper. Loud music almost always went with fast and reckless driving. A fire red mustang convertible whipped right past him. His speedometer read 42, seven over the posted limit. Usually he would let it go, but he caught site of some braids flowing behind the most gorgeous neck and honey colored skin. Putting on his cherries, he pulled out in pursuit.

_Shit. I guess today isn't my lucky day._ She saw the squad car after it was too late. Hoping he wouldn't pull her over for such a minor violation, she held her breath and drove on, but no such luck today. Pulling over, she lowered the stereo to a whisper and checked her rearview mirror, hoping to God it was a male officer. _Oh, it's Steve, piece of cake._ Never underestimating the power of a little cleavage, she yanked on her dress front, just enough to be considered sexy, but not skanky. She grabbed her tube of lip gloss and freshened herself up, just in time to put her hands on the steering wheel. She opted to keep on her sunglasses, her eyes had always been attractive and if push came to shove, she'd bat them bad-boys at him too.

Steve strolled up to her car, not a care in the world. He was finally going to get an opportunity to talk to her and this time she wouldn't be able to run. They danced the night before and even though he had been able to get her to stay through the end of the song, she left quickly there after. The closeness they felt in that one dance had thrown him and apparently it had spooked her.

"Going a little fast there Emily? Can I see your license and registration?" Steve looked down at her. Hot damn! She was wearing a purple dress that flirted around the knees. It had one of those scoop-necklines and there was really nothing left to the imagination. She smelled like vanilla today.

"Oh! Of course, I'm so sorry. I was just making a turn, music pumping, you know, feeling the mood, must not have realized the limit was slower on this street. Did I pass the sign?" Emily turned around to look behind her, expecting to see the posted limit hidden behind a tree or hidden in a bush. Steve raised his eyebrows at her theatrics; she was really laying it on thick. She was obviously used to talking her way out of tickets. He had to smirk a little as she waved her arms in the air, over exaggerating the injustice of the limit being so slow in this quiet wide back road. She jabbered on and on and Steve couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Want to go out with me tonight?"

Well damn, she didn't know she was_ that good_. "Hey! I mean, if I gotta _do_ stuff, I'd just as soon take the ticket."

"Oh, you're still going to get the ticket, but I thought I'd ask you out first. You ran away so fast the other night Emily, I never got to ask you out on a proper date. I'm also in the habit of finishing what I start and we started something on that dance floor. Don't you think we should explore it and see where it leads?."

"It leads to me going back to Chicago. I have a job there, a life."

"Not asking for marriage Emily, just a date. Then we can take it from there."

Steve pulled off _his_ glasses and she was sunk. Those big brown puppy dog eyes stared down at her and she couldn't say no. Even though every fiber of her being told her this guy was rebound at best and love-prone at worst, she just couldn't say no. The attraction she was feeling towards him was too strong and she was powerless to fight it. Then her mind snagged on something he said.

"Wait, you're asking me out AND giving me a ticket? No way. Of all the…."

He started scribbling on his pad, ripped it off and handed it to her. Shoulders slumped and ego thoroughly bruised, she snatched it from him and said icily, "Am I free to go?"

Lifting up half a smile he replied, "Certainly." And he walked away towards his squad car. She watched him walk away; damned if he didn't look twice as good going as he did coming. He got in his car, gave two blasts of his horn and drove off. Thoroughly pissed, she shook her head. She sure as heck wasn't going to go out with him now and he had forgotten to get her number anyway. Looking down at the paper in her hands she gingerly opened it, afraid of the amount that was going to pop out at her. Shock registered all over her face. The ticket read:

**_Call me and for goodness sake, slow down, there's no hurry._**

**_-Steve_**

**_617-555-5555_**

A slow smile crept over her face. Oh yeah, she'd call him alright. She just hoped like hell they both knew what they were getting themselves into.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

Stunning is what came to mind. Nick stood in the doorway watching Leslie put the finishing touches on her make-up. She never was one to lay it on thick; it was always subtle, classy. She ran her hands down the sides of her dress and picked at an invisible piece of lint. It was a beautiful dress, not at all what you would expect a bride to wear. First of all it wasn't white, it was more of a champagne color. And it was soft, made of pure silk. It flowed around her like water, rippling with the slightest move. It oozed sex and was carried off well. Nick rarely saw the resemblance between mother and daughter, but today, he saw where Emily got it from. Whereas Leslie kept it contained and only let it out on rare occasions, Emily's sex appeal was always two feet in front of her, demanding to be noticed. He decided he liked both ways. Finally she locked eyes with him through the mirror and her face lit up.

"Not bad for an old babe, eh?" She smiled at Nick, uncertain if the compliment would be returned.

"I'm sorry, who are you talking about? All I can see is this stunning fox standing in front of me." Walking towards her, he pulls her to him for a rare hug. "You look beautiful Leslie. A vision, honest. I'm… I'm so happy for you and Dad. I know he's not easy to get along with all the time, but you manage to make him so happy. He's really in love with you and I just never saw that coming, not again, not after my mom. And for a long time, I wasn't even sure if I would be okay with it. But it's you and well, you're just perfect. So, thank you, for coming into our lives and loving my Dad."

The tears started coming before she could even think about her damn mascara. "Nick, you do have a way with words, don't you? You've gone and made me cry…"

"You making my mama cry?! I'm gonna beat you down Garrett." A whirlwind of red came sweeping into the room. _Yup, two feet in front of her._

"Let me guess, _you_ got to choose your own dress." Nick replied to Emily dryly. All Nick could think of was Steve and how he was going to barely be able to hold it together once he saw Emily today. Poor bastard. They saw each other almost every day since he gave her the "ticket." She claimed she was just enjoying his company, but he could tell she was just hiding from her own feelings. Sometimes love developed over time, but other times, it just comes down on you quick. He suspects it has been the latter for Emily and she is at a loss for what to do with it.

"Uh-huh and Mommy's too. Isn't she a dish? I mean, with that body and hair? _Gawd!_ I would die for it, and I'm 21 years younger!"

"Well, there's nothing wrong with the body you have" Nick took a minute to giver her a slow perusal. It was definitely not the look a brother should be giving a sister, then he continued, "and other than being braided, it looks like you and your mom have the same hair."

Leslie and Emily both paused and looked at him. Simultaneously they burst into laughter, tears running down both of their faces.

"What? What's so funny?"

"Nick, seriously? Seriously? Okay, okay, listen, I wasn't born with this hair."

"Of course not, I mean it would have grown over time…"

"No, no, I mean, it's mine, because I paid for it. My hair, my _real_ hair is probably shorter than….hmmm, let's see, Phil's!" Nick's mouth dropped open. He had no idea.

"Wait… but, why? I mean, is it like a wig or something?"

"No, you idiot, they're extensions! Look, I wanted long hair, so I bought some. It's not uncommon! I was thinking about taking them out soon anyway, so you can help me with that; it takes hours." Dumbfounded Nick just stared at her while she continued. "Mommy you look so beautiful… the Commander is gonna take one look at you and wanna rip your clo…"

"That's enough Em. Lord!..." Leslie and Emily chatted away while Nick just stood there looking at Emily's hair, wondering how the hell she thought he would be able to help her take the braids out. Shaking his head, he figured he must have misunderstood. Leaving the women to themselves, he went downstairs in search of something to do.

…………………………………………….

"Eddie hurry up! I told Emily we would be there an hour early to help them set up and to hand out the programs and stuff. Besides, I don't want my appetizers to spoil and I already put them in the car."

Adjusting his tie one last time, Eddie gave himself a cocky wink in the mirror. He knew Janet loved him in a suit and would be ripping it off as soon as they got home. Spirits considerably lifted, he walked into the living and stopped dead in his tracks.

She had her back to him but he could already tell it was going to be a hot dress. It came just to her knee and she was wearing some really sexy skinny heels. Her toes were painted a really bright coral to match the dress. Her hair was wild and loosely curled and flowing halfway down her back, just how Eddie liked it. She had gone to Boston last weekend with the girls and gotten it colored again and it shone like copper. She must have picked up that dress too. When she turned, about to yell for him again, no doubt, she smiled and he about died on the spot. _Beautiful. Perfection. All mine._It was one of those wrap dresses with a thin, almost insignificant tie to the side of her waist. The dress was that coral color all over except for the edges; that was black. He let out a low wolf whistle, and she blushed. Striding over to her, he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to him. Crushing his mouth down on hers, she let out a low moan that only encouraged him to keep kissing her.

Trailing her neckline with kisses, he murmurs, "Mmmmm, you look good enough to eat Meadows." Pulling away from him, she pats him on his butt.

"Well then, you better save room for dessert, you can have all you can eat… later." Understanding the double meaning of her statement and liking it, Eddie tries to compose himself. He had to wait and would gladly do so if it meant having anything he wanted later.

"You really do look beautiful Janet. Sexy. You're so good to me, for me. I love you. God, I'm so lucky." He shook his head in wonder and started picking up his wallet and keys, not noticing Janet's reaction to the compliment. She just stood there, staring at him. _He really meant that. He considers himself lucky to be with me. After all we went through, after all the hurt and the pain, the good and the bad. He loves me. He really, really loves me. _

It wasn't like Janet hadn't heard him say it before, and it wasn't like she didn't believe it before either. It was just they way it seemed so natural and internalized when he said it just now that it seemed even more real. Perhaps that's what prompted her to say the next thing that came out of her mouth.

"Marry me."

……………………………………….

Allison flushed the toilet and sat the rest of the way on the bathroom floor. Laying her head against the pristine toilet bowl, she let out a groan. She felt like shit. Plain and simple. There was no way she was going to make it to the wedding feeling like she did. She wished she could just stay home and sleep. She just wanted to curl up and die. How the hell was she going to go through this, again? Just at her lowest moment she felt his arms come around her waist and literally pull her to her feet. She was enveloped in his embrace and immediately felt better, safe, loved.

"It's okay cranberry, the worst of it will be over soon. Give it a few more weeks, and then you'll feel right as rain." He was rubbing her back in just the right spots. He walked her back to the bedroom and laid her down. Leaving her for only a minute, he returned with cool washcloth and wiped her face and mouth. Folding it carefully he placed it on her forehead and kissed her gently on the cheek. "You know what you need? You need some rest. Your body is just adjusting to all of this and junior is just taking all of your energy now isn't he? Maybe you should just stay here and I'll take the kids to the wedding. Don't worry, now that everyone knows, they'll understand." He was rubbing her feet now, because he knew it was what relaxed her the fastest. Allison had yet to speak, she didn't need to. Owen knew her; knew her needs without them even being voiced. As she lay there drifting off to sleep she realized she would go through this again, just one more time, because Owen would be there and he would always make everything better.

………………………………….

Eddie dropped his keys. He stared at her for what seemed to be an eternity. His mouth was slightly open as if he wanted to speak but couldn't find the words. Janet panicked.

"Oh shit. Did I just say that out loud. Oh God. I mean, Oh God, Ohmygod, Ohmygod, Ohmygod. I can't believe I actually said that out loud. Eddie, I can explain. I was just thinking about how wonderful you are and how I can really tell that when you say you love me you mean it, and the then thought came into my mind that I wanted you and the way you make me feel forever and then I just kinda said it, I mean I was thinking it, but I don't really think I was meaning to say it out loud and well, AREN'T YOU GOING TO SAY ANYTHING?"

Eddie bent down to pick up his keys. Bending down at the knees with his head down, he finally spoke, but he never looked at her. "Did you mean it?"

"Well, I didn't mean to say it out loud, I mean, that happens sometimes, right? When you just blurt things out and…"

"But did you mean it?"

She nodded and then realized he couldn't see her because he wouldn't look at her. _Oh God, I've ruined everything. He's going to leave and I'm never going to see him again._ "Yeah… I guess I did. It was what was in my heart Eddie, I can't deny it. So yeah, yeah, I meant it."

He stayed where he was, bent on the floor turning it over in his head. He marveled at how far they had come; how far Janet had come. She had changed so much from their first tentative dates. She was so much more confident now and she loved herself. Gone was the insecure "chubby girl" who confessed her indiscretions to him. In front of him was a woman who was self assured and bold. She had the biggest heart of anyone he knew and she wanted him; a small-town boy with a fledgling business. She had just asked him to marry her and despite the fact that it was an accident, it became apparent to Eddie that it was a great idea; one he should have had a long time ago.

Eddie finally stood up. Janet braced herself to watch him walk out the door. He looked at her and held her gaze as he walked toward her. She stopped breathing. Her mind went blank. Her head dropped down. She couldn't look at him and wait for him to shoot her between the eyes.

"Yes."

"What?" She mumbled.

Eddie put his arms up and took her shoulders, giving them a slight shake. "Yes. I'll marry you."

Her head snapped up and when she looked at him again, there were tears in his eyes. Hers immediately flooded. _Oh God_. "Eddie, you shouldn't say yes… I mean… if you don't want to… if it's too soon… I mean, I understand and I don't want to put you on the spot and…." He rolled his eyes at her.

"You're going to ruin a perfectly good proposal Meadows." He kissed her roughly then, to shut her up at first, but then it changed and it gentled into a kiss that said so much more.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

Eddie and Janet stood at the top of the porch steps of the Garrett home handing out the programs. The wedding was going to be indoors and the reception would be out back in the yard under a large tent decorated with candles on pillars. There would be a pianist in the corner playing music during the ceremony and a dj out back to jam for afterwards. The living room was large enough to accommodate all their 40 or so guests with the furniture removed or pushed aside. As they passed out the programs, Janet and Eddie would sneak peaks at each other, smiling secretly. They decided to let this day belong to Leslie and the Commander and tell their friends about their own engagement later in the day.

………………………………

Inside the house, Robert paced the living room. He was nervous; plain and simple. It wasn't fear of marrying Leslie; it was a fear of public speaking. She had insisted they exchange vows and in a moment of weakness after sex, he had said yes. In retrospect he should have been suspicious of any subject that was broached after love-making, but then, he was a satisfied male and fell for it, just as she knew he would. So here he stood, trying to memorize the lines he wrote, however inadequate they might be, and praying to God he wouldn't look and sound like an ass in the process. He was an old-fashioned kind of guy and writing down his deepest feelings for the entire world to hear seemed strange and new but he would do it, as he would do anything, for Leslie.

……………………………………

All the guests had arrived and were waiting in the living and dining area for Leslie to come down the stairs. Phil stood around videotaping the guests and getting their congratulations on film for the happy couple. Emily was no where to be seen, though Steve kept his eyes trained around the room in hopes of catching a glimpse of her. It had only been a week and a half and he knew with all his heart, he was in love. He also knew that this day, though it was a happy occasion, would mark the beginning of the end of their short glorious relationship. She would leave in a few days to go back to Chicago and take his heart with him. Sulking in the corner, he crossed his arms and pouted like he was 4 years old again.

Eddie walked in the house arm in arm with Janet. They were smiling like two fools and didn't seem to have a care in the world. Steve noticed the happiness that radiated between them. He noticed the way Eddie and Janet seemed to anticipate each other's needs. He noticed how Eddie stood behind Janet, rubbing small circles on her shoulders with his thumbs, they way Janet looked up at him like he was everything and could do anything. He envied them their happiness, he didn't begrudge it, but damned if he didn't envy it all the same.

Steve knew if given a little more time, he would be able to justify asking Emily to stay, see where it all headed, but she had made things clear from the beginning that they could only be casual, that it couldn't get serious, because she was leaving and what would be the point? But they spent every day after the speeding ticket together and in those few shorts days he had fallen in love with her. On their third date they went out to his new place on the water and she ooh'd and aah'd as he assumed she would. It was really the perfect home, built on the perfect piece of land, meant for a perfect family. She was wearing a killer black dress with a plunging neckline. She was wearing chunky silver jewelry including a silver chain with a huge blue pendant the color of the coral reef, just in case you missed the cleavage, the pendant was bound to draw your eyes there. She came over with the intention to seduce him, right down to the black spiky 'fuck me' pumps on her feet. Steve had used every ounce of his will power to deflect her advances. Frustrated by his rejection she finally asked him,

"What the hell Steve? I mean, are we gonna _do_ this or what?"

"Emily, I can't. Not knowing you're going to leave in a few days. I think it might literally kill me. I know Emily, _I KNOW_; once I get a taste of you, get a hint of your scent, I won't be able to let you leave. I'm afraid I'll become a desperate man and kidnap you just to keep you here with me. No, no Emily, I can't do this. But don't think, not even for one second that I don't want to." She relented after that and they spent the rest of the night talking. She understood where he was coming from and admitted that she was pushing it because she thought she would regret never having made love with him. Snapping back to the present, Steve noticed that everyone started walking towards the living room, ushered in place by either Janet or Eddie.

………………………………

Stratton Lorb didn't play the piano anymore. He hadn't played in a long, long time, the memory, of his long passed mother still fresh every time he tickled those ivories. But he had visited the Garrett home a few month's before and the Commander had been going on and on about how no one had touched the piano since his wife died and he sure missed the sound of it. So Stratton had walked towards it, as if in a trance and started to play. He played classical, some slow rock and then finally, some down-home gospel. He played and played until his soul felt cleansed and his heart felt light. He finally stopped after what must have been hours and then had a good long cry. The Commander had walked up to him then, and put an arm around his shoulders.

"Who did you lose?"

"My mother. It was six years ago. It was yesterday. The pain is still so fresh sometimes I can't tell the difference."

"She used to play too?"

"Yeah, yes sir. She taught me. She used to say I had her talent. This is the first time I've played since she's been gone."

"You'll play again, when it feels right. You'll play again."

And so here Stratton sat; waiting for his cue to play again. He saw the bright red toes first; encased in some very sexy heels. Then the honey colored legs made their way halfway down the stairs. He was fixated on them, not able to look away, praying the face wouldn't disappoint. She crouched down on the stairs and he immediately tumbled head first into full blown lust. He hadn't seen Emily before, but now that he had, Stratton made a promise to himself that he would sample this woman.

"Psssst. Hey, Stratton? You can start playing now, okay? She's all ready" And then she smiled and Stratton felt the warmth of a hundred suns. He sat there stunned into stupidity. Emily waited for him to start playing. Nothing happened.

"Psssst. Stratton," He looked up at her, "...PLAY!" She gave him a knowing smile and turned on her heels and went back up. Shaking himself a little to snap out of the Emily trance, Stratton started to play. Emily came down the stairs accompanied by Nick. The dress hugged every curve on her body. It was long and tasteful, but somehow, probably the way she was moving in it, made it look just a little too sexy for a bridesmaid dress.

Leslie made her grand entrance and every eye was on her. She was smiling so hard she thought her face might just split in two. Ronnie was holding on to her for dear life and she could feel his nervousness radiating from him. He confessed to Leslie earlier that he was afraid he might trip her or something, since he was notorious for being clumsy when nervous. She soothed him as best she could, wondering who was going to soothe _her_ nerves. _Funny, even on your wedding day, you were a mom first and a bride second_. Making her way down the last step, she finally looked across the room and saw Robert standing there. He was wearing his tan suit and the new cream-colored shirt she bought him. He looked so commanding, so virile, so in love; it took her breath away for a minute and she stumbled just slightly as her world shifted on its axis. When their eyes locked, even from way across the room, her world righted itself and he smiled, slow and straight from his heart.

Robert felt time stand still. He wouldn't need photographs to remember this day, to remember this moment, to remember what she looked like. Leslie was so beautiful and once again he thanked God for this second chance at happiness. He still didn't know what he did to deserve having had the honor of loving two beautiful woman in his lifetime and having them love him back, but he sure wasn't going to question it. When she finally reached him and Ronnie placed her hand in his, he blew out a breath of relief; with her holding his hand, he would make it through this.

They held hands through the entire ceremony and when it was time to exchange their vows and the rings, they turned to face one another.

"Robert. Some days I wake up not believing this is all happening. The love I have for you goes beyond anything I ever knew was possible. You have opened your heart, your home and your family to me and mine and for that, I love you even more. I pledge myself to you today Robert, in sickness and in health, through good and bad, until the end of time. I love you." At her last words, she slips the ring on his finger and gives him a watery smile.

"Leslie…" Robert clears his throat a few times, and blinks really heard, trying not to let the tears flow. Giving up, he gives his head a little shake and continues. "I never thought I could find love again. I didn't believe in second chances, nor did I think I was deserving of them, but then, there you were and I knew at that first moment that I had to try. I wasn't disappointed. You are the light in my soul Leslie. Your support and love have kept me going at times when I didn't think I could and I love you for that even more. So today Leslie, I pledge _myself_ to you, in sickness and in health, through good and bad, until the very end of time. I love you." By now, Leslie and Robert alike had tears streaming down their faces as he slips the modest diamond on her finger.

Half of their guests were in tears as the pastor announced them husband and wife. Eddie pulls Janet close to him and nuzzles her neck. As everyone is clapping he whispers in her ear.

"That was beautiful. I hope our wedding is just as special. I love you baby and I can't wait till you make an honest man out of me." Janet giggles and tries to hold in her laughter. Her joy is was almost too much to contain.

……………………………………

As the guests make their way to the backyard, Steve heads towards Emily. Just before he reaches her, he notices a tall pretty-boy-type cozy up beside her and put his arm around her waist. _Who the hell is that guy?_ He definitely didn't come from around since he had city written all over him. Steve starts fuming inside wondering if this guy isn't the reason Emily doesn't want to get serious. Did she have someone else back in Chicago?

Across the room, Emily stiffens when she feels unfamiliar arms possessively work their way around her waistline.

"Easy baby, it's me, Stratton; pianist extraordinaire. You_ have_ to dance at least the first six dances with me."

"Oh really, and why is that?" She quirks an eyebrow and turns in his arms to look him in the eye. Oh yeah, definite heartbreaker. Emily has a hard and fast rule about dating pretty boys though; she doesn't. No man can spend more time in front of the mirror than her, it just ain't right.

"Well, one dance is common, expected even. Two dances? Well, that could be just because you're being polite. Three or four? Well, it means you're diggin' me for sure. By the time we get to about six, all the other men hanging around waiting for a dance figure you're with me and back off. See? I'm beating down the competition without even throwin' a punch."

Despite herself, she laughs at his antics and lets him lead her to the dance floor. Seeing the scene unfold from afar, Steve walks out the front door without a backward glance, heart heavy from a minor misunderstanding.

……………………………………………

"Darce, you really do look beautiful. I can't wait to get you home and…"

"_Ikey!_" Darcy blushes at Ikey's attention. She wants very much to leave the reception and go home and make love but at the same time she relishes this chance to get dressed up and look pretty. Working in a hardware store hardly offers her the ability to do so on a daily basis, so she wants to enjoy it and just bask in the joy of being a _girl_. Ikey pulls her closer as they sway to some unknown R&B tune when she sees Eddie approaching them out of the corner of her eye.

"Sorry Darcy, can I steal Ikey for a minute?"

"What the hell man? What gives? Go 'way, whatever it is, it can wait." Ikey is buried deep in Darcy's golden hair holding her tighter at the very thought of an intrusion.

"Come on Ikey, just a minute. Darcy, why don't you go over and join Janet and the rest of the girls gabbing in the corner. I promise I'll bring him back to you before two songs have passed."

"No problem Eddie. See you in a bit." She gives him a slow-promise-filled kiss and walks away. Ikey admires her leave and would have done so all night had it not been for Eddie clearing his throat.

"Ahem. Shall we?"

They walk over to a semi-private corner of the tented backyard and meet up with Phil, Nick, Ronnie and Owen.

"So what's all the ruckus Eddie?" Owen asks as he takes a bite out of one of the appetizers Janet had made earlier. He closes his eyes in delight. Damned if Eddie wasn't a lucky man.

"Yeah, you sounded like it was urgent. I hope the hell it is, I was working on convincing Darcy to leave early…"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, but I kinda felt like my news trumped you getting laid and you," he paused and pointed his chin towards Owen, "…stuffing your gut." Eddie paused and took a deep breath. "Janet proposed to me and I said yes. We're getting married."

Owen's mouth dropped open almost causing him to loose his last bite. Nick's head whipped up to look at Eddie incredulously and Ikey looked a little pale. It was Phil who stepped forward first and grabbed Eddie into a hug congratulating him in the process. That action seemed to kick-start everyone else as they slapped backs and high fived Eddie. After everything died down, Eddie turned to look at his friends.

"What gives with the reaction? Do you all think it's a mistake?" Everyone starts speaking at once in such a rush Eddie has to hold up his hands to quiet them down. Phil speaks for the group and soothes Eddie's worries.

"Absolutely not. I think we were all just in shock. I mean, you hadn't mentioned marriage, but I think we all knew that you were so in love with Janet from day one that it was bound to end up here. Personally my shock just came from the fact that _she_ asked _you_." Phil smiled at Eddie and it made him feel much better. He was a grown man, but these men were his best friends and with this being such a huge decision in his life, he felt validated somehow, knowing they thought it was a good idea too. As expected the jokes started flowing about balls and chains, decorating, lack of sex and early nights in. Eddie took it all in stride because he knew they were just kidding around with him. As they all laughed and smiled, he searched out Janet from across the tent. She smiled at him, that special smile that Eddie knew was just for him and he knew that she was the best thing to ever happen to him.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

"So wait, you just… proposed?" Hannah looked at Janet as if she had sprouted two heads. She also looked angry at her best friend and Janet couldn't figure out why.

"Right on girlfriend, it's about time you took the bull by the horns! I think that's great Janet. I'm really happy for you." Pizza Girl hugged her fiercely and rubbed her back as if she were a proud mother.

"Holy shit Janet, that is above and beyond being a strong independent woman. You're….you're my hero!" Emily was already tipsy from the champagne, turns out she couldn't hold her liquor, and she was trying to drown out her sorrow over the fact that Steve hadn't even bothered to stick around for a dance after the ceremony.

"Congratulations! Very progressive, I'm impressed." Aubrey commented.

"Wow Janet, I could never do something like that. I mean, did you plan it?" Darcy was finally feeling comfortable around the girls as she went to give Janet a hug as well.

Janet looked over at Hannah while she answered Darcy's question. "No, it wasn't planned. I kinda was feeling all lovey-dovey and it was on my mind and it kinda came out of my mouth before I realized what I was doing. He had just told me that he was so in love with me and that I was so good to him and for him. He said he was lucky. I just blurted it out. He was shocked, for sure, but he was touched and incredibly sweet and totally into the idea of it. I think Eddie and I have been through so much that we know we are done hurting each other and we just want to move on to the stage where we love each other exclusively. I don't know…. That's just what I was feeling at the time. I guess since he said yes, he was feeling a bit of the same."

Hannah still hadn't congratulated her; in fact, she hadn't said anything at all after her initial comment. Janet knew that things were strained between the two of them since she had dropped out of the wedding, but surely she could be happy for her? Troubled by Hannah's silence, Janet tried to listen to the joking and congratulations that Pizza Girl and Emily were pouring over her, but it was difficult to concentrate since her best friend in the entire world didn't seem to be happy for her.

…………………………

"Hey Sam, you having a good time?"

"Yeah Nick. Doodie just went inside to wait for the crab cakes to come out of the oven; he doesn't want to miss them." Sam rolled his eyes; it was a usual thing to roll his eyes when discussing Doodie. "Oh and thanks for letting me bring him, I would have been bored without someone my own age to hang out with." Sam blushed, realizing he probably shouldn't have been so honest.

"No problem Sam, I'm just glad you and your mom could make it." Nick paused for a second, wondering if he should pry just a little. "So, how's your mom doing anyway?"

"Are we talking about her general health and well being, or the fact that Big Cat is a slime and she's still gonna marry him?"

"Oh… wow…. Sam, I didn't mean…"

"Nah, it's okay Nick, people forget that I'm _wise beyond my years_ and I also have ears, you know? I know what Big Cat had done to Eddie. I just can't figure out why my mom chooses not to believe it."

Nick claps him on the shoulders and brings him to him for a quick hug. "Your mom is gonna make the best decision for you and her. Just give her time. And you're right Sam, you _are_ wise beyond your years."

Sam beams up at Nick and for the thousandth time wishes Nick was his dad. You see, Sam had come to some decisions over the past few days and decided that he was going to find out once and for all if Nick was his father. He had ordered a paternity kit off the internet that only cost him twenty dollars. He lied and told Big Cat he needed to order some books off of a website and asked to use his credit card. His mom would have wanted to see the site first, double check everything, but he knew Ray wouldn't care. He had it sent over to Phil and Eddie's place. He lied again there, telling Phil and Eddie he was getting a present for his mom and didn't want her to know. So all he had to do was wait a few more days and then figure out how to get a hair sample from Nick. Then he would have to mail it off and wait weeks for the results. He didn't care; it was worth it, if it meant that Big Cat couldn't adopt him. After what he had done to Eddie, Sam couldn't see him in the same light, gone was the hero he thought he was and now ever present was a bully in Sam's eyes. His opinion had dropped so low, he just couldn't bear the thought that he might actually become that man's son. So Sam decided he would take fate into his own hands and see once and for all if his mother was a liar too.

………………………………………

Hannah excused herself from the girls as soon as she could without looking suspicious. It wasn't like she wasn't happy for Janet; it was just that she was so miserable herself. She was starting to feel what a future with Ray would be like. He wasn't invited to the wedding. That was made perfectly clear by Nick. He had walked over her and Sam's invitation personally and had made it clear that Ray was not welcome in the Garrett home. When Ray saw the invitation later that day, he had gone through the roof over the "stones on Garrett." He had all but forbid her from going, but had to relent when Sam walked in asking what he was going to wear to the Commander's wedding. A life with Ray was going to be very isolating; everyone in the Ridge was starting to believe he was behind Eddie's beating. If truth be told, she was one of them. She was just too scared to admit it to herself or anyone else. Once she voiced her doubts out loud, everyone would be swooping down on her to break it off with him and she just wasn't sure she wanted to be alone. An image of Nick flashed across her face and the love that she thought was buried and dead 11 years ago came rushing back as it always did when she thought of him.

Hannah thought of Janet, her bravery. To be a woman and put yourself out there like that? She was in awe of her. Hannah had worried that Eddie would destroy her best friend's already fragile self esteem, but it seemed to have the reverse effect. Janet had blossomed, like a caterpillar into a butterfly and it was a beautiful sight to behold. Hannah wondered at her own strength, her own resolve. She wondered if all of her secrets that she buried all those years ago were done for Sam's own good (as she had told herself) or for her own. Was she a coward? Was she just afraid to face the consequences for the choices she made? She would think about it and come to some conclusions. She looked longingly across the lawn at Janet, wishing she could share in her happiness, wishing she could open up to her best friend and get her advice about what to do about Ray and more importantly about Sam and Nick. But Hannah shook her head, she would not take away from Janet's happiness right now, she would have to come to these decisions on her own, otherwise, how would she ever know what she was made of?

……………………………….

"You having fun Ronnie?" Leslie was laughing as he twirled her around on the dance floor. Her hair had since fallen from being pinned up and she had a youthful glow to her face.

"I'm having a great time. The wedding was beautiful. I'm so happy Dad found you. Thank you for loving him, I know he's not easy to get along with at times."

"Who, your father? Tsk…tsk. He's just a big 'ol teddy bear Ronnie. All growl and no bite. I can handle your father just fine. Now, how are things going with Aubrey?"

Ronnie glowed from the inside out. Things between him and Aubrey had been idyllic. He never knew that a relationship could be so good. The sex, the conversations; everything was just… perfect. "Things are going great. I love her… I mean honestly and truly."

"I know. And it's wonderful that you two are together. Now we just have to get your brother to be happy too. I had initially thought him and Emily might hit it off, but I don't think he will ever really get over Hannah. I worry about him." Just as she was about to say more on the subject, Robert interrupted them with a loud clearing of his throat.

"Ahem. Go get your own woman son. This one's taken."

"No problem Dad. Excuse me." Ronnie walked off in search of Aubrey and Robert took over, swaying over the dance floor with Leslie, remembering that first time they went dancing together after he had found out about the cancer. It was a bittersweet memory, but it was the beginning of what he knew would be the rest of their lives together. He vowed to beat the cancer and to make Leslie his wife on that day. He twirled and spun her around the dance floor today much as he had that night, loving her more and more by the minute.

………………………………

Phil sat in the corner of the tent soaking in all the people in the Ridge that he hadn't seen in such a long time. He scanned the room for the Commander, so grateful to him for that final push out of doors. His eyes finally found Penny. She had her back to him and was laughing at something Aubrey was saying and he thought how lucky he was. She was quirky and did all kinds of strange things to her hair. She never dressed conventionally and always expressed herself with her hands, sometimes too animatedly. She was a little tall and pretty lanky for a girl; but everything about her that some might find to be flaws were endearing to him. She was his match in every way imaginable and he loved her to pieces. To find a woman who could love a man that was housebound? What a rare find indeed. As if she could feel him staring at her, she turned her head around and looked at him. Her face broke into a huge smile that brought all the love he was feeling rushing to the surface. Yup, his Pizza Girl was one of a kind.

……………………………….

"Ready to get out of here Darce?" Ikey was already nibbling on her neck and she could feel his erection pushing through his pants. Immediately all the juices started flowing at the thought of being with him. She simply nodded her head and smiled at him. Kissing her slowly on the lips he let his hands roam up and down her back a little further down than was appropriate for public but he was intoxicated by her scent and the very feel of her skin.

"I gotta go get my purse, I put it upstairs in Emily's room." They walk hand in hand towards the house. Ikey doesn't even try to hide his arousal, he's just hoping like hell he'll be able to ease it within the next five minutes or so.

………………………………

"Dance with me Hannah Jane?" Nick came seemingly out of nowhere. Hannah was so engrossed in her thoughts she hadn't heard him coming. Her immediate response was to start shaking her head negatively.

"I don't think that's such a good idea Nick. Ray wouldn't…" Hannah couldn't look him in the eye, knowing the hurt she would see there was too much for her to handle at this point.

"Ray's not here. Hannah, it's just a dance. Come one. Dance with me, let me hold you Hannah, you look so sad and alone." Relenting, she shrugged her shoulders in a _what the hell_ kind of way and let him lead her to the dance floor. What he said was true. She was sad, and she felt lonely. It was dark outside now and the whole tent was lit by huge candle pillars. The music was soft and the mood all around was one of romance. He snaked his arms around her body and pulled her close to him. It was like sliding home. Despite being back in the Ridge for almost a year now, this was the closest he ever got to her. Besides that day on her porch when he asked her to take him back, he hadn't even touched her. Now Nick was afraid he wouldn't be able to let her go.

Hannah sighed. She put her arms around Nick's neck and rested her head on his shoulders. They swayed as if they hadn't been apart for 11 years. Their bodies though different with age and time still knew each other. Their bodies moved in unison to their own music as if of their own accord. They lost all sense of time and surrounding; Nick and Hannah were together again and their bodies reacted the only way they could. Nick became aroused, as did Hannah. He ran his hands up and down her back, slowly telling her without words that she was his and that she was powerless to fight it anymore.

"Hannah…" The way he said her name as if he were in the desert, dying of thirst. She was scared to lift her head and answer him, because she could only answer him one way. She knew if she lifted her head and looked at him, her whole life would change in just that instant. "Hannah…" more urgent this time, desperate, he ran his hands down her back and caressed her butt. He pulled her closer to him to let her feel exactly what her closeness was doing to him. "Hannah Jane, _please…_" Hannah felt herself giving in. She lifted her head off his shoulder and looked at him. All of the hurt and the pain of the past 11 years melted away and before her eyes was the boy she had once loved and the man he had become. She knew that she could count on him and she knew that he wouldn't hurt her again, and yet still she was afraid to make that last step. Nick took the decision from her. He looked at her searchingly and saw her acceptance, her raw need for him. He leaned in and captured her mouth and they both fell head first back in love.

……………………..

"Found it!" Darcy was stretched across Emily's bed on her hands and knees searching for her tiny purse. Ikey just stood in the doorway admiring the view. Long tanned legs and a short black dress. She had no idea about modesty since she hardly ever dressed up. Ikey slowly closed the door behind him and turned the lock. He wasn't concerned about getting caught or the fact that it was someone else's room and bed, he just had to have her, right at this moment or he was sure he was going to die. Before she scuttled backward off the bed, he was right behind her pulling her underwear down her legs.

"Ikey, what the hell are you doing?" She whispered in a panic. "Someone might…" She swiveled her head towards and the door and noticed it was closed.

"Please baby, I need you. You don't understand how hot you've been making me all night." His hands we moving 100 mph pulling her underwear down over her ankles then off her feet and stuffed into his pocket. He slid her dress up over her hips, yanking on his belt and zipper before she could even get another protest past her lips.

"I don't know Ikey it's pretty disrespectf…" He slid right into her. She stopped mid sentence and closed her eyes in pleasure. "Oooh."

"Darcy, oh god Darcy." He wouldn't wait for her to cum this time; he was too lost in the feel of her. He moved fast and pumped furiously emptying himself into her only minutes after starting. He slumped over her back but held her strong despite his weakened state. "Darce, I'm so sorry. I couldn't wait, I couldn't hold it, I just had to be with you, be _in_ you. I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you when we get home."

Disengaging herself from him; she turns and smoothes his hair from his face. "Shhhhh, it's okay." She smiles into his shoulder reveling in her power over him and thinking of all the delicious ways she will have him "make it up" to her.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

Janet and Eddie were dancing in the far corner. Eddie was stealing kisses and Janet was giggling. She glowed under all his attention and Eddie vowed to shower her with it for the rest of their lives. Janet laughed at something he said and turned her head to rest it on his chest below his shoulder. Eddie felt her tense immediately and turned his head to look in the direction she was.

For the second time that night, Owen almost lost a bite of food. Phil and Pizza Girl were just walking back in the tent from the kitchen and almost dropped their plates. Leslie and Robert stopped dancing now to watch the scene unfold. Leslie smiled, Robert creased his brow in worry. Ronnie's expression mimicked his father's. Sam and Doodie watched from afar, Doodie's mouth was agape and Sam's held a beaming smile. Emily, who was very nearly drunk at this point, had let Stratton tease her into dancing again, but stopped when she saw Nick and Hannah kissing.

Perhaps it was the drink, or perhaps it was just Emily, no one really could tell. She walked right up to them and slurred.

"You guys really should get a room. I mean, little eyes are watching. Hell, all eyes are watching!" She sashayed away and broke the spell that seemed to be cast on them both. Immediately Nick felt Hannah pulling away, both physically and emotionally. Panicking, he grabbed her wrists.

"No, Hannah… NO! We have to talk about this. Don't run."

"I'm not the one who runs from things Nick." _Ouch, that was low._

"Look, can we go somewhere more private? We kinda got an audience here." She nods and he takes her hand and leads her into the house straight to his bedroom. They pass Ikey and Darcy on the stairs. Darcy looks flushed and Ikey looks satisfied. Nick shakes his head smiling at the randy couple and hopes like hell they weren't just fooling around on his bed.

"Nicky G, what up?" If Ikey found it strange to see Nick and Hannah holding hands and going up to his room, he had the grace not to say anything.

"Nothing much Ikey. I'll catch up with you later, aight? See you later Darcy."

Darcy just bobbed her head and didn't meet his eyes. Nick smiled at her. She was really a sweet girl and so good for Ikey. Once inside the room, Nick closed the door gently behind them. He walked over to the window and closed it, knowing the conversation would carry through it. Turning to Hannah, he took her hands in his and just stared at them.

"Look, I'm sorry about the running comment. But, we have to talk about this. Big Cat's gonna hear about our kissing in no time so you're kinda forced into making some decisions. You know I love you, right Hannah?" At this point he lifted her chin and made her look at him. "After all these years, it's you, it's always been you. Please, give us another chance." He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her like a straight jacket, giving her no chance to move. "Hannah, I can make you happy, I can make you feel like you can depend on me again. I promise you, I won't leave."

"Nick… I'm…I'm engaged to Ray. He loves me. I love him."

Nick wouldn't be deterred, he knew this moment was one of those defining points in his life, and whatever the outcome, he had to give it his all. "But are you still _in_ love with him Hannah? He's not a good person. You have to see that by now. Sam doesn't trust him anymore. No one trusts him, including you, I suspect. Is this about Sam? A father for Sam? I can be that, whether or not his blood runs through my veins. I can be that to him Hannah. You won't have to move out of your house. I'll live there with you. I won't leave unless you want me to Hannah, please. I love you Hannah, I love you, I love you." Releasing her a little so he can have access to her mouth, he starts kissing her, tenderly at first then the passion ignites again. They kiss forever, but in reality it's only a minute or two. Finally they break away from each other, both feeling the loss of contact straight to their hearts. Hopeful Nick looks into her eyes for an answer.

"I'm sorry Nick. This is a big decision, I…. I can't just make it because you make me feel good when you kiss me. I can't just change my whole life around at this moment."

"But you will at least think about it? Consider it, consider us?"

"I don't know Nick. I…I'm scared." There she said it. "I'm scared of how you make me feel and of how much I love you and of how much power you have over me. I'm afraid to let you in again, of being hurt. I almost didn't make it through the last time you left. I almost lost Sam because I was so irresponsible with my pregnancy. I almost lost myself too…it was so hard and I just don't ever want to feel that way again."

"Hannah, I can't speak on what you went through, you don't exactly paint a pretty picture of that time, that's for sure. I can only apologize and offer you insight into what I was thinking of at that time. I've told you before I was running from the memory of Ma, it was too much for me to handle. I was a stupid kid, but I'm all grown up now… when faced with a problem, I don't run from it, not anymore. I look at Sam and think about the possibility that he could be mine and I know that I would never again run from my problems because the consequences are too high. I might have missed out on 10 years of my son's life because I was a coward." Shocked, Hannah looks directly at him. Her eyes are puffy, but immediately defensive.

"Whoa… when did this turn into a conversation about Sam and you being his dad? I never said… you know Gavin Goddard…" Nick's eyes narrowed, he wasn't going to back down on this either. Not anymore. She had almost a year to get comfortable with the idea of him being back in town. Now, it was time for answers.

"Hannah, look, you and I both know that there is a very real possibility that Sam is my son. I want to take a paternity test, I need to. I want to know for sure."

"You do know for sure, I told you." She responded with such a lack of force, he smiled at her.

"I know what you said, but sometimes we say things that we don't mean or that aren't true in order to protect ourselves and the ones we love. I get it. But I have been back almost a year now, and I've stuck. You didn't think I would, Sam probably didn't either, but I did. Now it's time to put the questions to rest Hannah. I want to know, I have a right to know. If he's not mine, then I won't mention it again unless you want me to. But know this Hannah, I still want him to be mine, whether it's by blood or adoption. I love you and I don't want you to marry Big Cat. I need you. I want to marry you, make babies with you, love you until the end of time. Okay. That's all I'm gonna say right now." He kisses her gently on the forehead and turns on his heels out the bedroom door. Once outside he leans against the hallway wall and lets out a huge breath. The ball was in her court; all he had to do now was wait.

………………………

"Wonder what's goin' on up there? You think this is it? They'll get back together?" Eddie looks down at Janet. He knows what it means to find that special someone and wishes the same for his best friend. How did he get here, to this point in his life where he wanted to be with one person for the rest of it? Shaking his head in amazement, he tunes back in to what Janet responds.

Janet looks up at Eddie. "Nah, I think it's going to take a lot more than a kiss for Hannah to forgive and forget all that Nick put her through. But, I'm hopeful because it seems possible now." Eddie hugs her tighter and starts to sway to the music again. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Ikey and Darcy hand in hand working their way over.

"What did we miss? All's I know is I see Nicky and Hannah heading to the bedroom holding hands. Looked a little cozy if ya ask me." Ikey had already put on his favorite BoSox cap and no doubt had plans to remove the tie before he made it to his pick-up.

"I dunno Ikey. They were dancing and then locking lips and then they headed off. Oh, Emily told them to get a room first." Eddie shrugged. Janet looked back and forth between Ikey and Eddie. Turning to Darcy she said:

"And they say women are the ones that gossip."

…………………………

"So, you wanna show me around this one horse town?" Stratton loved dancing with Emily. She had great rhythm and they seemed to have an easy flow. She seemed like the kind of girl that would be up for a little fun.

"I don't know Stratton, I'm a little buzzed and you've been here lots of times before anyway. You don't need me to show you around. I think I just need to sleep this off. I really shouldn't have had so much champagne."

"That's alright little mama, come on, shake it off and go out with me tonight. I can have my driver take us down to this spot I know in Boston. We can dance all night."

Looking up at Stratton Emily realizes she really likes him. He's funny and personable and outgoing, but she also realizes he's just not Steve. Feeling her heart sink she wonders for the hundredth time why he left so abruptly. She thinks of Nick and Hannah and what they are about to embark on and realizes she wants that too. Getting more pissed by the minute she looks at Stratton and dares to ask him a favor after shutting him down.

"Stratton, I can't. My… my heart just wouldn't be in it… but could I ask you a huge favor?" His shoulders dip a little. He knows what's coming next and before she can ask, he interrupts her.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with that big, bald-headed brotha I saw storm out earlier?"

"Well, yeah… see… we've been kinda seeing each other…." Emily continues to explain all the while leading Stratton through the house and out to his waiting limo.

………………………………….

Pretty soon, Nick makes his way out of the house, alone. He walks towards the group, quickly joined by Owen, Phil and Pizza Girl. Before he can let them in on what happened, the Commander, Leslie and Ronnie walk over too. Aubrey hangs back, unsure of her welcome. Disgusted, he throws his hands up in the air.

"Well, you might as well come over too, so you can hear it first hand. You're practically family." He smiles at her then, the first real smile he's given her since the break-up and she feels welcome once again in the Garrett home.

"What goes on Nicky? Where's Hannah?" Just as Eddie asks this question, Sam works his way over with Doodie. Glancing down at Sam, Nick shifts from foot to foot, unsure of what he should say in front of the boy.

"Nick, really? Come on. _Everyone_ saw you locking lips with ma, you don't have to downplay the conversation for me. Remember? I was rootin' for you." Sam was always so direct. Nodding his head, he continued to speak.

"I gave her the best that I had, laid it out there and left the ball in her court. She knows how I feel, now I just gotta wait and see if she feels the same way about me and is strong enough to admit to it. I gotta wait and see if she's willing to take a chance on me one more time." Palms up and shrugging his shoulder, he fell silent. Everyone just stood there, not really sure what to say. Finally the Commander spoke.

"You know, you kids, you do things now-a-days and you just don't think about your consequences. Nicky, I know how you feel about Hannah, we all do. But for Chrissakes, she's engaged to a lunatic! Don't you think Ray is gonna hear about this? Take out his anger on her, or you?" Leslie touches his arm and glances down at Sam as if to warn the Commander not to scare the kid.

Smiling impishly, Sam says, "It's okay Leslie, I know that Big Cat has a temper. Look what he had done to Eddie! But I don't think he would hurt ma.." His brow creases in concern, identical to that of Ronnie and the Commander's frown, "right Nick? He wouldn't hurt my ma? Would he?"

Putting his hand on Sam's shoulder in comfort Nick glares at his father. "I'm sure your ma is going to be just fine Sam. We don't have to worry right this second anyway, she's upstairs thinking in my room. She wouldn't leave without you anyways…"

"Oh! Well, she said I could go over to Doodie's after the wedding so…" Nick's head snaps up as if he can see his bedroom window with the tent in the way. Cursing to himself, he runs into the house. The Commander turns to the boys and says,

"Look, fellas. I know you're all duded up in your Sunday best, but can you make sure my boy stays okay? There's gonna be a blow-back for sure and I don't think he realizes it just yet."

"Sure thing Commander." Giving him a mock salute, Eddie and the guys run off after Nick, leaving the "women-folk" behind.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

"Thanks for the ride Stratton. I appreciate it." Leaning over Emily gives him a soft kiss on the cheek. Holding his hand to his cheek in mock adoration, he answers her.

"No problem Em. You sure you don't want me to stick around, make sure you aren't stuck out here without a ride?"

"I'm sure. His car is here and we have things to discuss. If I have to I can call a friend. Don't worry. Okay?" She slides out the door and pulls her wrap tighter around her shoulders. By now the sun had gone down and the night air was cool. Engulfed in darkness as Stratton's car pulls away, she knocks on Steve's door and waits to tear into his ass for leaving the way he did.

…………………………….

Hannah wasn't thinking when she quietly slipped out the Garrett's front door. She wasn't thinking when she walked the seven blocks to her house and let herself in. She just wasn't thinking that Ray possibly could have heard about what happened. She just wanted to go home and think. She wasn't thinking that the Ridge was a small town and that everyone knew everything much sooner than you wanted them to. So that was why she was distracted and just plain ole' not thinking when she walked right into the lion's den.

………………………………

"She's gone. I gotta get over there right now; make sure Ray doesn't do anything stupid." Nick was circling his room like a caged animal.

Eddie looked just as pissed off as Nick. "Then what the hell are we standing around for? Let's go over there and kick Rays' ass." Ikey and Owen glared at Eddie. Owen walks over to Eddie to look him in the eye.

"Eddie, dude. This isn't about your wanting revenge. It's about Hannah. We know you're pissed off at Big Cat, but we don't even know if he's done anything yet, besides, Nicky was the one kissing _his_ girl. Doesn't matter that he's a slime, _he_ was the wronged one here. So if he doesn't step across that line as far as Hannah is concerned, we don't have a reason to kick his ass." Owen says this without bitterness or an accusing glare towards Ikey; they were finally healed.

"So, what? WE'RE SUPPOSED TO WAIT AND SEE IF HE SLAPS HANNAH AROUND FIRST? HELL NO!" Nick was shouting and looking like he wanted to punch the first person to say another word.

Putting a calming hand on his shoulder, Phil spoke to Nick in a quiet deadly tone. "We won't let Ray do anything to Hannah Jane. We got your back Nicky. But we need to calm down and think this through. We all go storming over there, Ray's gonna call the cops and we're going to end up having to answer questions. And on top of that, if memory serves me correctly, Steve is off tonight, so we get no free passes."

"So what the hell should we do then??" Nick was trying his hardest to keep his head, but the guilt of kissing Hannah was crashing down on him like a violent wave. Why hadn't he thought about such a public display? Now Hannah was going to have to confront Big Cat and if anything happened to her…

"Call Hannah's cell and see if you can get a hold of her first. If we can't, we'll take a drive over there and wing it, okay?"

Mollified somewhat by Phil's suggestion, Nick pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and dials Hannah's number. Once her voicemail picks up, he leaves her a short message, begging her to call him immediately. Hanging up, he turns to the guys.

Phil nods his head. "Looks like we're going over there. Eddie, keep your cool, okay? Nicky, we're just going over there to see is Hannah, right? I mean, we're not looking for a fight, just Hannah, okay? If's she's okay, then we leave. Got it?"

"Got it. Can we get going now?

"Absolutely." They all head downstairs towards the front door.

…………………….

Janet knew Eddie would be pissed, but she was worried about her best friend. So when everyone started speculating, she quietly excused herself and ran out to Eddie's truck. Hesitating for a split second, she fished in her purse for his keys and hops in the truck heading towards Hannah's place.

…………………………

Emily rang the doorbell and waited. She glanced toward the side of the house and double-checked for Steve's SUV, and it was there. She laid her finger on the doorbell again and let it ring continuously. At this point she was beyond mad; she was just plain getting cold. There was a chill in the air and her spaghetti strapped dress and thin wrap were barely keeping the chill at bay. Wondering if he was in the shower, she walked the front porch to peak through the living room window.

……………………….

"Come on let's take my…." Eddie turns around in place a few times as if trying to figure out where he parked his truck. Shaking his head with disbelief, he curses. "Son of a… she wouldn't have…"

"Eddie man, where's your truck?"

"Janet must have taken it to go check on Hannah." Numbly, Eddie stands in place wondering what the hell was wrong with these women.

………………………..

Standing in her kitchen, the first thing Hannah felt were Ray's arms slipping around her from behind. She sinks into the safety of the feel of them. He kisses her neck and pulls her tighter to him. She lets out an involuntary moan. Never saying a word, he lets his hands roam up and down her body one hand dipping lower to her waistline, the other snakes upward towards her neck. He settles it there, first applying a little pressure, then making it slightly uncomfortable for her. Hannah tenses.

"Uh… Ray?"

"What's the matter baby, didn't you think I'd hear about your little romp with Garrett?"

………………………….

Steve had come home to find a very unexpected and unwanted guest in his house. Distracted as he was about the whole Emily incident, he hadn't even sensed a presence in his home until he was halfway to the kitchen. Armed as usual, he drew his weapon when he heard the rustling sound come from the couch. As soon as he saw who it was, he lowered and holstered his gun.

"What the fuck are you doing in my house?" He continued walking towards the fridge. He didn't usually use such harsh language, especially to or around women but he was in a foul mood and this woman had hurt him so badly.

"Oh baby, don't be that way. Surely you've been missing me? Missing this?" She stood up then, all legs and breasts and long straight hair. She wasn't wearing much, a short skirt and a very tight baby t-shirt. Her feet were bare and she was sipping a glass of wine. His eyebrows lifted at the sight of this and the anger simmered to a rapid boil."

"I see you've made yourself right at home. Again I ask, what are you doing here Trishia?"

"Well, isn't it obvious Steve-baby, I'm here to take you back." A look of shock crossed over Steve's face. _Take him back? Good grief. _Trishia continued, "Look, I know things have been strained between us, but surely you're not looking to throw away so much time and energy. We had a good thing you and me. Don't you miss it, miss me, even a little bit?" She walks to towards him with each word and he feels himself rooted in the spot. He hasn't had sex in months. Frustrated over his decision not to bed Emily when he had the chance, he considers Trishia's body. They were always hot in bed together. He wondered if he shouldn't just take what she was offering and ease the pain he was feeling in his loins. She wasn't the woman he loved, but then, maybe this would help him on his way to getting over Emily, since apparently, he couldn't have her. Putting his hands on her hips, he pulls her closer to him and just looks at her. She closes her eyes and waits for her victorious moment.

…………………………

"Ray…. Ray… stop. You're hurting me." Tears start rolling down her face. How the hell had she ended up in this place, with this man? Why hadn't she been smart enough to leave him when she found out about Eddie?

"I'm hurting you? I'm hurting you? _I'M_ HURTING _YOU_?" With each time he repeats himself, the hold on her neck gets tighter. Because he's behind her holding her like a vise, she can't move her body and her arms can't reach behind herself effectively to inflict any pain on him. Hannah let's out a strangled moan. Almost as suddenly as he gripped her, he let her go with a shove. She stumbles forward and quickly turns to face him. Nothing could have prepared her for what she was going to see next.

………………………………

"Commander? Do you think my mom is okay?"

Decidedly uncomfortable, Robert looks down at Sam and stammers. "Uh, yeah, sure kiddo. I'm sure she's just fine."

"But them why did you tell Nick and the guys to…"

"Oh sweetheart," Leslie cuts in, "he was just being cautious. Your mom is really special and we know that Ray might get a little riled up at the thought of losing her. Don't worry, she'll be just fine. Come on, let's go crash the dessert table. I've been eyeing that cobbler my daughter made; it's the best peach cobbler you'll ever taste." Leslie guided Sam towards the food, chatting away at any and everything, just trying to keep his mind off the possibilities.

………………………………

Emily peaks in the window, careful to stay off the side so as not to be seen. Her jaw drops and her hearts starts to break at what she sees. Steve is holding Trishia around the waist intimately. He's smiling at her, but it doesn't seem to reach his eyes. Never one to jump to conclusions; she keeps watching unashamedly. He pushes her away and starts talking to her, shaking his head and backing away. Even though Emily can't hear the conversation, the message is clear. He's rejecting her! Her heart soars and she does a little dance in a tight circle on the porch. It's time to go claim her man. Straightening her dress and yanking on the neckline a little she walks toward the front door and turns the knob, figuring out the kind of girl Trishia is, she knows a confrontation is about to take place. She smiles to herself because she loves a good fight.

……………………………….

Janet pulls up to Hannah's place and runs to the door. Just as she was about to knock, she holds herself back. _What am I doing here?_ Janet stands there for what must have been five minutes wondering if she'd even be welcome if she went barging into Hannah's house. Never having the chance to answer this internal debate she turns at the sound of tires squealing to a stop behind Eddie's truck. Nick jumps out and is running toward her. Phil is shouting for him to slow down and come back. Eddie is right behind him, but his focus is on Janet, not Nick.

"Janet, what the hell?? I mean, I turn around and you've gone and run off?? What the hell were you planning on doing anyway?"

Back immediately up, Janet gets on the defensive. "The same thing you were probably going to do, try to kick Big Cat's ass if he so much as puts a finger on her." Arching her eyebrow, she smiles at him. He visibly relaxes and starts to laugh. They both know that tough as she may be, she wouldn't actually be able to kick his ass. "I got here and thought to myself, what the hell am I going to do? So I was waiting for you guys to show up."

"So you haven't gone in yet? Is she even home?" Nick's way past agitated and is seriously considering kicking down the door. Sensing his intentions, Janet gently places her hand on Nick's shoulder.

"This is the Ridge Nick…" She walks to the door and turns the knob, "no one locks their door, especially when they're home." Eddie, Nick and Janet walk through the front door of Hannah's home and immediately hear the voices coming from the kitchen. Walking towards the sound, bits and pieces of the conversation start becoming clear.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Tears were flowing down his face. His eyes were red and swollen. He looked…broken.

"I'm sorry for putting my hands on you. I got a call from a buddy who was at the wedding. Told me what he saw…I…I don't understand. Did you ever love me Hannah Jane?" Pain etched his face and Hannah immediately felt like the worst person in the world. She was done hurting those she cared about. Rubbing her neck gingerly, she approached him… cautiously.

"How can you even ask that? I love you Ray, I have for a long time. And for the longest time I was in love with you, but…" Looking at her with defeat, he waits for the inevitable. "but, I'm just not in love with you anymore. I don't know when it happened. But it did and I can't marry someone I'm not in love with. I'm sorry you had to hear about me and Nick the way you did. I had every intention of telling you. We're not together, but I think…I think I can finally admit to myself that I am open to the idea of trying again. I love him too Ray. I never quite stopped loving him. I'm so sorry. If he had never come back… who can really say where we'd be? But I can tell you that he always had a piece of my heart that I never gave to you and it wasn't fair. Not to you or to me. After what happened with Eddie and what Matt told me, I never trusted you with my whole heart again. You've told me you didn't do it, but I don't believe you."

"But Hannah…"

"Don't Ray. Just DON'T. No more lies, okay? We both know you had Matt beat Eddie up. It's inexcusable so don't even try to justify it. He could have been killed for chrissakes!" Shaking her head in horror at the memory she continues. "But I was scared to leave you. Loyalty means everything to me and I didn't want to walk away from you. You had been so good to me. But not anymore. I have to think about my future's happiness and that no longer looks like it's possible with you." Ray pulled up a kitchen chair and slumped in the seat. Defeated by Garrett, losing the woman he loves all in one day was just pure humiliation. Face in his hands, he starts to really let go and cry in earnest. Shocked into silence, Hannah walks to him and puts her hand on his shoulder, slowly rubbing it in a soothing manner, as she would for Sam after skinning his knee. This is how Nick, Eddie and Janet found them in the next minute when they came rushing through the door.

………………………………………….

Steve seriously considered burying himself in the familiar warmth of Trishia's body. He knew every inch of her, every curve and secret crevice. But sex was never their problem, it was everything else. Giving himself a mental shake, he slowly pulled away. Trishia looks at him coyly. She smiles in her "come hither" way and it almost breaks his resolve. She moves in to kiss him and he immediately sees Emily's face pop into his mind.

"I can't…" Steve mumbles. Then he clears his throat and starts shaking his head from side to side. He voices his protest even louder this time. "I can't do this Trishia. I'm sorry, but you have to go. This isn't what I want." Backing away, she wraps her arms around him tighter.

"Come on, you're gonna turn this down? I guarantee you'll feel better than you ever felt with that little tramp you've been running around with lately." As soon as she said it, she realized her error. Steve's face hardened; his already dark eyes turned stormy. Trishia gasped and stepped back.

Speaking in a deadly whisper he looked her in the eye. "Get the hell out of my house and never, EVER come back. I catch you trespassing on my property again, I'm going to arrest you, and you _know_ I am capable of it." He waked to the couch and snatched up her purse. Shoving it into her arms he leads her to the front door.

"But… Steve, but, I didn't drive out here. I need a ride into town!"

"You should have damn well thought about that before you let your ride leave you. It's only a mile and half until you get to the main road, you'll be fine, it's the Ridge, not Boston." Yanking open the front his eyes almost pop out of his head when he sees Emily standing there.

"Em!"

She smiles at him then. Having heard the tail end of his telling Trishia off, Emily feels considerably better and much more charitable towards the woman who had come to steal her man. Her man! She didn't know when it happened but that is what he had become. Now all she had to deal with was how they could make things work over a long distance. All her anger towards him dissipated. Even though he owed her some answers about why he left the wedding so early, she knew that where she wanted to be was with Steve.

………………………………………….

Robert watched as Leslie soothed Sam's concerns. He was glad they were finally married and she would be his just as he would be hers, for as long as God saw fit to allow. Ronnie silently walked over and sat next to his father.

"Surprised you didn't run off half-cocked like your brother and the goon squad."

"Nah, decided it was much wiser to stay here and hold down the fort with you, protect the womenfolk!" Ronnie laughed at himself, as he often did. Sobering, he continued. "Besides, I feel for Big Cat. He loves Hannah and even though Nicky loves her too, I kinda felt it wasn't my place to…" He searched for the words, but his father finished for him.

"Wasn't your place to defend Nick when it's Ray who should be upset? Ronnie, you have to forgive yourself and allow yourself to be happy with Aubs. What happened between you and her and Nicky, it was a tangle for sure, but it's over and all is forgiven. Okay baby boy?" Robert tugs Ronnie toward him for a bear hug. Ronnie nods his head a few times and wraps his arms around his dad.

"Thanks Dad."

……………………………………..

Since Eddie had given the rest of the guys the signal to leave, they climbed out of Nicky's car and started walking back to the Garrett house. Owen was concerned about his kids, who in the heat of things, he had forgotten were at the wedding and now alone!

When they walked in the front door, Caitlin and Connor came running up to him, "Daddy!! We didn't see you and we thought your forgot us! But Mrs. Commander told us that she was watching us and you'd never forget us!" Caitlin had tears in her eyes. Owen scooped her up into his arms. "You wouldn't forget us, right Daddy?" Owen shot a thankful look at Leslie then looked at his daughter with all the seriousness he could muster.

"Of course not sweetheart, I could never forget you guys." Conner, being a little older and wiser, snorted and tried to hold back the laugh he was holding in. He knew for sure this one was worth at least 5 bucks for his silence, especially from their mom. Owen glanced down at Connor and fished in his pocket. Shaking his head, he handed over the ten dollar bill. He didn't have change and this was hardly the moment to ask around for it. Ruffling his son's hair, he pulled him one armed towards his body, thankful for a wonderful safe place like the Ridge.

……………………………………………

Ikey walked up to Darcy. "You ready to get outa here? If I recall, I owe you a lil' somethin'."

Darcy smiled, he owed her a lot more than a 'lil' somethin'. "Did everything work out okay? What happened? How's Hannah?" Kissing her neck and rubbing his hands up and down her back, he silenced her with a mind altering kiss.

"Shhhh. Hannah's fine. Eddie gave us the all-clear so we headed out. Eddie, Nick and Janet are still there." Nibbling on her earlobe, he starts moving slowing to the music playing out in the backyard, even though they are in the living room. Whispering so close to her ear that she felt the warmth of his breath, he continues, "I'm going to take you back to your place Darce and I'm going to kiss you all over your body." Warmth pooled immediately towards Darcy's center, almost causing her to buckle at the knees. "I'm going to kiss you in all your secret places and make you forget your own name. Then when I get you all hot, " he plants kisses on her jaw line, "and bothered," more kisses along her shoulders, "and wet…" he pressed her closer to him, so she can feel the hard length of him, "I'm going to make torturously slow, passionate love to you until we both lose ourselves in each other." Kissing her again, slowly this time; parting her lips with his tongue, tracing the contours of it and finally dipping in. Darcy hums in anticipation. She knows that Ikey will follow through down to every last detail. If he was nothing else, the man kept his word. Sighing in pleasure she grabs his hand and quickly walks to the front door dragging him behind her.

…………………………………………….

"Well my friend, you certainly had an adventure today. How are you feeling?" Pizza Girl was still in amazement over Phil's sudden ability to leave the house. She worried that he would relapse or that he would push himself before he was ready. As if he could read her mind, he tugged on one of her ponytails playfully.

"You're stuck with me now. If you ever try to leave me, I will follow. I'm not going anywhere, and I'm not going back to the way things were. Don't worry about me sweetheart. I'm fine. I'm just sorry that I left you alone for so long. I'm done with that; done with you doing things without me. It was a terrible burden on you but you stuck by me and never complained about it. Penny, you're amazing. I love you." Pulling her close and holding her tight, she believed him and finally allowed herself to dream about a "normal" relationship filled with dates to the movies, snowball fights in the street and long walks in the rain on an early Sunday morning. A single tear of joy slipped from the corner of her eye and rolled down her face.

…………………………………………..

"Hannah? You okay?" Nick's face focused on hers and smiled. Eyes locking from across the kitchen, Hannah gave a quick nod and glanced down at Ray, hunched over in the chair. She knew the instance Nick noticed what must have been bruising on her neck, his eyes immediately changed from gentle to steel. Sensing his best friend's change in mood, Eddie made a grab for Nick but wasn't quick enough. Janet gasped and Ray's head popped up in time to receive the first of a rapid succession of blows to the face. Eddie stood there, apparently content to let him beat the shit out of Ray "Big Cat" Cataldo. He had seen the bruises around Hannah's neck and in Eddie's opinion, he deserved whatever he got.

"You SON-OF-A-BITCH!! You couldn't just accept the fact that she didn't want you anymore more?? I'll kill you, I'LL KILL YOU FOR PUTTING YOUR GOD-DAMNED HANDS ON HER!!"

Now, anyone who knew Nick knew that he wasn't one to go around punching people. He wasn't like Eddie, quick to throw a fist in the face of anymore who dared him. It took a lot more to get him riled. Apparently almost choking the woman he loves and possibly the mother of his child to death, qualified as reason enough to make Nick react violently. As he kept hitting him, repeatedly, Eddie realized that Ray wasn't fighting back and that Nick ran the risk of actually killing the slime. Sensing the danger of the situation, he finally starts pulling Nick off Ray. Arms flailing, Eddie just kept holding him and telling him that it was enough. Ray lay sprawled on the floor, face barely recognizable blood oozing from his lip and the corner of his eye. Hannah was being held by Janet, sobbing hysterically. Janet resisted the urge not to walk over to Ray and kick him in the nuts and spit in his face. Seems the only one in the room who had any pity left for Ray was Hannah and Eddie. Ironic, since they were the two people he had hurt the most. Once he was satisfied Nick wouldn't go for Big Cat's jugular again, Eddie let him go. Immediately he dialed 911 and asked for an ambulance to come for Ray. Eddie knew the difference between a fat lip and some serious damage. He was pretty sure Nick had managed the latter and worried for a minute about his friend and whether he would share a fate similar to Matt Lausch.

"Haaaaannah." A raspy voice came from the floor. Barely recognizable now, Ray lifted his head towards Hannah. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry Hannah…"

**A/N: Sorry I have been away for so long. I've been battling summer visitors and morning sickness. Hope all is well and you enjoyed the update. I'll be posting more to this story soonish?! Thanks as always for the reviews and the support. Long live the Ridge!**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

The paramedics arrived along with the police, Phil was right, Steve wasn't on duty tonight. To everyone's surprise Ray told the police in a strained voice that it wasn't a big deal, he deserved it and that he wouldn't be pressing charges against Nick. Eddie made a sigh of relief but Nick seemed far less impressed by Ray's charity. After all, he pointed out, that had stopped Hannah from pressing charges against Ray, which was probably his hope from the start. Even half beaten to hell, he was still a self-serving bastard. Since there was no one else to go with him, Hannah rode with Ray to the hospital in the ambulance, Nick following behind in his car. Janet and Eddie decided to finally go home and celebrate their engagement, though they really weren't in the mood, added to that, they would be taking care of Sam for the time being.

Walking hand in hand back to the Garrett house, the moon was bright and the night held a chill in the air.

"You cold?" Eddie already had his arm wrapping around her shoulder, he rubbed it up and down briskly as they continued their walk.

"Mmmmm. Better now. Quite a night, huh?" Eddie nodded his head then realized she couldn't hear that.

"Yeah, quite a night. I never imagined Ray with a heart. I mean, I know you once told me that he treated Hannah well, but I guess it never occurred to me that he could actually love her. I mean, I know he wanted her, always has, but love her? Nah, I never believed that."

"What makes you believe it now?"

"A man like 'Big Cat' Cataldo doesn't cry for just any little thing Janet. She told him it was over, and he knew this time it was. He was hurting and humiliated and humbled. I'm not saying I agree with what he did, but I know what it's like to lose control when you're so in love you can't see straight. Sometimes you hurt the ones you love, sometimes you hurt those you think are responsible for keeping you from them."

"Are we talking about Ray or that day at my place, when Rooster came by to say goodbye?"

"Both. I could've killed him Janet, with my bare hands, I would have watched the life drain out of him, but you saved me from that, you stopped me, you talked me down. I'm grateful to you for that, and I love you all the more for not looking at me like I'm a monster." He paused in his walking and turned her to face him. He kissed her lightly on the lips, rubbed her temple with his palm and smiled at her. Then he turned and they started walking again. He continued. "I'm sure he was in a rage when he went to hurt her, but his love for her, made him stop, despite the fact that he couldn't have her anymore. It must have been torture. I know it was for me. To think about living without you? Going from day to day without that joy you bring to my life? It was hell. I never want to feel that way again. So I want to thank you, for finally doing what should have been done for weeks if not months. I love you and I'm so sorry that I wasn't the one to propose first, to give you that memory."

"Eddie, it was the perfect proposal and in my mind just right for us. I haven't always been confident about myself or my status with you and well… to do that… to propose to you, that was a big step, even if it was a slip of the tongue." She smiled at herself, who proposes by accident? "When you said yes… my heart, it grew a hundred times and I thought it would plop right out of my chest and fall at your feet. Because it's yours now, to do with as you'd like. I didn't have a choice; I never did when it came to you. I went and tumbled for you the very first time we kissed and I never wanted to experience what it was like to be without you again." He tightened his hold on her then and they fell into a companionable silence for the rest of the walk to the Garrett's place.

As they were walking up the front stairs, Sam came rushing out.

"Eddie! Janet! Is my mom okay? Where is she? Did Big Cat hurt her? Where's Nick?" The boy rushed them, not unlike a linebacker, Janet and Eddie braced themselves for the impact. Slamming into them, instinctively they both wrapped an arm around him and soothed.

Eddie explained what happened, they felt Sam was old enough to handle the whole truth, as they walked inside the house. It was decided that they would head back over to Hannah's place so Sam could be home when she got there and neither one of them would be without the other.

The Commander and Leslie had an early flight to Jamaica the next day for their honeymoon. By the time Eddie, Janet and Sam had left, the newly wed couple, barely had energy to flip on the television as they sat on the couch in the living room. All the furniture had been put to rights and everything was spotless. Leslie congratulated herself on insisting to pay extra for cleanup; it was worth every penny.

"Well, Mrs. Garrett, regretting any of this yet?"

She thought over the day, how everything started out just right and then started turning down the path of small town drama. She should have been upset about the day not being focused entirely on her and Robert, but she wasn't. She was a mother after all and it came with the territory. "Not one second of it, sweetheart." She pulled him towards her for a slow, promise filled kiss.

………………………………

Hannah sat by Ray's bedside. She was angry with him for sure, but understood her role in the fiasco. He was pretty bruised up, but not as badly injured as Eddie had been. She supposed when you took a beating from 3 guys as opposed to one, the damage would be worse. Nick sat outside the room, waiting for her. He didn't like her visiting with Ray, but he held his tongue about it and waited patiently for her to get the closure she needed. Hannah thought Nick's rage was so out of character; she had really only seen that side of him once before, after his mother had been dead and buried for over a month. He was kneeling on the floor in his room looking for something under his bed when he found a note from his mother. She often left the boys notes in their room reminding them of this and that. Hannah was sitting across the room doing some homework when she saw him fumble with the small piece of paper. The note had told him to clean up his pig-sty of a room before he looses something that really mattered. Then, as always, she signed it with love and a heart. A very girly thing to do, but that was Caroline, strict as they come, but always feminine.

He froze as he read the note, over and over. This last contact with his mother, somehow new and fresh, brought on a rage in him. He threw things and cursed his mother and God for leaving him, making him lose faith. He was so blind with anger and rage, it scared Hannah. She tried to call out to him, but he didn't hear her. He was lost in his grief and could not be reached. She left the room and sat outside his door, sobbing by herself. She knew at that moment that there was a part of him that she just couldn't reach, that he had locked away from her and it made her worry. He left for Europe a time later and she knew in her heart, he would not return. When he left her though, he left her with a part of himself, a most precious part that she never told him or anyone except her mother about. But even to her mother she lied, telling her that the baby was possibly Eddie's or Gavin's as well as Nick's. Her mother believed her and as usual assumed the worst of her and called her a whore. The words though expected had cut deep and made Hannah try hard to live up to her mother's low opinion.

For months that summer she slept with any man that was willing. She drank and partied but by some small miracle Sam had survived it all. He was a survivor; her Sam was, even in the womb. It was meeting Janet that summer that finally made Hannah take stock and count her blessings for the new delicate life she was carrying. Janet had a way of making her see the good in herself and in others. Shaking her head out of her trip down memory lane, she stood to leave. Ray was asleep and would likely be for the rest of the night. Having been given a cocktail of painkillers, she saw no point in staying. Giving his hand a squeeze goodbye, she started out the door.

"Haaaannnah," he wheezed, barely conscious and still sounding as if he was in pain. She realized now, it wasn't physical, but emotional scars that would take the longest to heal for him. "Haaaannnnah…." She saw a tear roll down his cheek, eyes still closed and no doubt lost in a nightmare of his own making. She rubbed her neck where he had put his hands on her and walked out the room towards the man she hoped was now ready to be with her, one hundred percent.

…………………………………..

Emily breezed in the door past Steve and Trishia. Walking into the living room like she owned the place, she went to the bar area and poured herself a glass of wine from the bottle Trishia opened earlier. Steve was glad to see her, of course; Trishia, however was pissed. Rooted in the same spot they were in when she walked in the door, Emily felt the need to comment.

"Uh, baby, weren't you just showing your uninvited guest the door?" Emily spoke to Steve but was looking Trishia dead in the eyes. Both woman thought they could take the other and neither of them was above a little physical brawl if it came to it.

"What? Oh, yeah….Trishia, it's time for you to…" But he was cut off as Trishia stalked over to Emily, towering over her by at least 6 inches. Where Emily lacked in height, she more than made up for with her sharp tongue.

"I'd back up just a little bit Miss Thang. We don't need to get ugly in here. It's obvious which way the evening was going before I showed up. He doesn't want you. And if you search deep down, you know you don't want him either, not really, or you wouldn't have been stupid enough to let him go in the first place. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go on up, and take a nice long bath. Steve, _honey_, join me in a few?" Emily sent him a smoldering look and set down her glass to walk away.

"You think you can just waltz into town and take what's mine? Steve was with me first and I'm not going to stand around and let the likes of you come in here and ruin my play!" She made the mistake of jabbing a finger at Emily's chest. Steve noticed before Trishia did the change in Emily's eyes. They went from playful, to hate-filled in two seconds flat. There was no doubt she didn't see it coming, for the shock on her face when Emily slapped the shit out of her, well, it was priceless.

"Don't, DON'T, ever think about putting your hands on me again hussy. I may be short, but I know how to whup some ass if I have to. Now, I'd walk away if I were you, I'm already bored with you." Always the queen, Emily, picked her wine glass back up, and started for the stairs. Before Trishia could even think of a come back, Steve had her firmly by the arm, ushering her out into the dark night. He pushed her to his car and drove her cussing and screaming to the edge of town. She could walk from there. Goodbye and good riddance was his only thought. By the time he got back, Emily had bathed and was in the kitchen shaking her head at the meager contents in his fridge. She was wearing his robe and looked damn good in it. He decided that she would always wear it, and that he had to figure out a way in which to accomplish that.

…………………………………………………

"How is he?" Nick asked, not out of concern for Big Cat, but more for Hannah's sake.

"Do you really care?" She lifted a brow at him and broke into a slow smile.

Shaking his head he answered. "No, not really. He can rot for all I care. I'm not going to apologize for what I did Hannah, he had it coming."

"You'll get no argument from me there. Oh! Nick, uh, give me one second, okay, just one sec." Hannah dug in her purse and pulled out her cell phone. She pressed the number one and send.

"Hello?"

"Janet…."

"Hey, how are you? Don't worry about Sam, he's home at your place. Eddie and I just got him to finally go to bed. He wanted to wait up for you."

"Thanks Janet, I appreciate it. We'll be back there shortly. Nick and I are going to stop off at his place so he can say goodbye to his Dad and Leslie before they leave in the morning." This was a surprise to Nick; he just looked at her, trying to gauge where she was going with that bit of information. "He's going to stay the night; we have a lot to talk about and a lot to catch up on. Oh and hey Janet? You're the best godmother ever…uhm…"

"What is it Hannah? Is something wrong? Has Ray taken a turn for the worse or something?"

"No, Ray's fine. It will take time, but he will heal. It's just, well… I wasn't such a good friend to you earlier when you told me your good news. I wanted you to know I'm happy for you and I love that you've found someone who truly sees you, for who you are; beautiful, sexy, kind and loyal. I'm sorry I didn't tell you all of that when you first told me. I just had some stuff on my mind. It's not an excuse, I know, just my reason. I love you Janet and you mean so much to me and I just wanted you to know it while I was thinking it, that's all."

Sniffling on the other end, Janet mumbled something unintelligible and said her goodbyes.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: So, I'm going for something a little different. When you meet William, think George Stults! We are going to find out "what goes on" in the mind of Eddie Latekka.**

**Chapter 30**

Fall in Knight's Ridge was always a sight to behold. Looking out any window, you would see an explosion of color; red, yellow, orange and sometimes purple. There was still the lingering traces of green her and there but for the most part, autumn had arrived. The leaves were falling carelessly to the ground and there was a slight crisp in the air that wasn't there a few weeks earlier. The streets weren't as crowded with kids playing as they opted to go inside out of the cold.

It would appear the Commander and Dean's wedding marked the end of that summertime weather. They had had a lovely time in Jamaica, walking Dunns River Falls and driving through Fern Gully. They ate jerk chicken from roadside stands, drank way too much Rum Punch and sat and talked with the natives as they wandered the countryside in a hired vehicle. Leslie insisted on staying in a condo on the beach instead of an all-inclusive resort. They were forced to venture out in order to have entertainment and learn about the culture of the island. Robert had the time of his life. He had never been to a tropical island. It was relaxing and exciting and every single day was an adventure. Leslie bought everything she saw, from wood carvings to kitsch necklaces and t-shirts. She got her hair braided and beaded and looked a little like a Black Bo Derek from 10. Imaging her coming out of the water in a bikini, he shifted in his easy chair, awoken by his arousal. Looking around the room, he realized he must have nodded off. Standing and following the sounds from the kitchen, he decided to go surprise his wife with an afternoon delight.

…………………………………………

Janet rushed to work. She hated being late, it wasn't in her programming, but Eddie had been so convincing in getting her back to bed that she didn't have it in her to resist. A quickie turned into a slow passion filled lovemaking session. He murmured his love to her over and over as he took possession of her body. Still tingling from the sensation of it all, she nearly ran a stop sign. Slamming on the breaks, she took a deep breath and waited until her heart rate returned to normal. _That man might just be the death of me, imagine that._ Smiling, she shifted back into gear and carefully made her way to Sully's.

………………………………………….

They had made love that night. It was more than he had ever thought possible. Not only had their bodies connected, but their souls had mated as well. Steve knew that Emily was the one for him before that night, but after it? Well, let's just say all rational behavior had left the building; he had to have her, not only as his lover, but his wife and the mother of his children. She had left two days later and sure they talked on the phone every day, but it wasn't the same. It had been a month since she was gone and he missed her more each day. He had some decisions to make and they had to happen quickly. He loved this woman and he wasn't going to take the chance that it might not work out for something as trivial as distance. Sitting down in front of his computer, he pulled up the already bookmarked website for the Chicago Police Department and navigated straight to the employment section.

……………………………………………

William Latekka was happy to be back on American soil. After living in one African village after another over the last 3 years, he would admit that even he needed a break. The Doctors without Borders Program had been an amazing experience. He felt like he had really helped people in true need, but it also took its toll; both physically and emotionally. Watching children die from starvation and people lose limbs and their lives for simple treatable infections was just too much now. He thought when he signed up that he would make it at least five years. He managed to outlast most of the people he started out with but still couldn't seem to make it one more day. He was afraid he was getting used to the death, used to the smells and the agony he saw day in and day out. He was losing his sensitivity and so it was time for him to leave. He always worked hard; putting himself through college then medical school, despite his mother's drinking and his father's absence. He always felt slightly guilty, leaving the way he did, leaving Eddie alone to deal with his mother's neglect. But he reasoned, there was no way he would be of help if he had stayed, he felt himself slowly dying inside and he knew he had to get away and make something more of his life. His little brother should have been far away from there as well, riding a football scholarship and out in the world, but fear of failure or strong his ties to home (he was never quite sure which it was) had kept him in Knight's Ridge.

They had almost eight years between them but always wrote to each other. He explained to Eddie in a static filled phone call over a year ago that his mail wasn't getting delivered since he moved around so much. He got a post office box in Brooklyn to be a place Eddie could always reach him. Unfortunately he hadn't been able to get anyone to check that for him in almost a year and last he heard, Eddie had his sights on a short, curvy bartender that was not his usual type, but Eddie had felt was totally out of his league. He had read that letter and thought it sounded promising. Could his baby brother finally be ready to move on and start a serious relationship after the Rory debacle? William had written to Eddie over the year as well, but was never able to read those letters he was sure Eddie had sent to him. Anxious to find out what was going on, he went straight from the airport to his storage facility to get his Harley, next stop, the post office.

………………………………………………..

Christine Cataldo kept vigil by Ray's side the two weeks he was in the hospital. After finding out about his break-up with Hannah (thank God!) she rushed to the hospital to be with the man she loved. Most people didn't imagine her capable of deep feelings, but she was. Ray had managed to break through her ice princess veneer so many years ago and grab hold of her heart. Even though she pushed him away, that hold was always there. She had created life with this man and didn't intend to make the same mistake twice, by letting him go a second time. Sure she heard all the rumblings about him doing dirty business and possibly being responsible for Eddie's attack, but, well, quite frankly she didn't care. If Ray put effort into something, it was usually for a reason. Surely Eddie deserved it and the good for nothing hussy Hannah, well, he was well rid of her.

She had managed to convince him to come home to the Flats with her and the boys, while he recovered. She hoped that living together as a family again would help him see what a great idea it would be. She knew he still loved Hannah; though she was loathe admitting it to herself. Christine could only hope there was a small amount of affection left for her in his heart and that it could bloom again into love for.

"Thanks Chris. You didn't have to do this. I'm well enough to get my own lunch. Hey, shouldn't you be at the office anyway?" Ray's face was almost completely healed. The bruising was all gone and except for the stitches he received over his left eyebrow there was no outward sign of injury. He had been sore around his stomach and chest area from a few body shots from Garrett, but luckily for him, he hit like a girl and didn't do any internal damage. Now feeling almost top form, he wondered how he was going to break it to Christine he was leaving after lunch. He was starting to have a sinking suspicion that Hannah had been right about his ex-wife still harboring feelings for him.

"No, I cleared my schedule this afternoon. I thought we could take the boys to the park." She leaned over to pick at an invisible piece of lint on his shirt hoping he would catch whiff of the perfume she was wearing. It had been a gift from him to her, only worn on special occasions. She wanted him to know she still treasured it and him.

"Uh…. Yeah, about that…I was kinda thinking it was time for me to get back to the Ridge. You know the business and all. I can't be away this long. I've already lost a few accounts to Best Friend Windows and I can't afford to lose anymore big ones, you know?" Seeing the crestfallen look on her face, he rushed to continue, "But I'm up to taking the boys next weekend, I'm sure you could use a break, some peace and quiet…" He trailed off as he saw the tears start to well in her eyes. He was at a loss on how to deal with her and since she had been so good to him after the incident, he couldn't bring himself to be mean to her, as was his usual habit.

…………………………………………

William checked into a hotel in lower Manhattan. He would need to find an apartment sooner rather than later and he would definitely need a job. But having made good money before he left for Africa, he had some time and cash to coast and figure out exactly what he wanted to do and more importantly, where he wanted to be. He took a quick shower and then settled in for the evening. With his Chinese take out spread out on the bed, the TV on a low hum, he took out his stylish, yet necessary reading glasses and started reading Eddie's letters; put in order by the post mark.

_Will,_

_Hey big brother! So, I don't know that I told ya that Nick Garrett is back in town. Yeah, it was a bit of a shock to us all, I mean, ten years nothing and then all of a sudden… well, doesn't matter. I got nothing to say to the guy. I seen him a couple of times, a few times in my own damn house. He talks about staying, but if we know one thing about Nicky, he's all talk and no action. I give him a month._

_So, that bartender I was telling you about? Janet? Well, I finally got up the nerve to ask her out. I kept it all cool and made her think it was just an off the cuff idea. I don't think she has any idea I got the hots for her. That's a good thing because I don't really know what to do with those feelings anyway, you know? I mean, what the fuck do I have to offer a girl like her? She's smart Billy, I mean really smart. And she's cool, I mean, I can talk sports and beer and hell, we can even talk about my "dates" and she's always got something funny to say. It's like hanging out with the guys except she's got tits. I dunno. I'll let you know how it's going in the next letter._

_I want you to be careful and be safe. I know I say it all the time, but I'm proud of you, and Ma is too, even though she's out of if half the time. Oh and thanks for the money you sent for her. I used it to pay her bill up for the next year and put the rest in an account for emergencies. To answer your question, no, I haven't gone to see her. I got nothing to say, but I will at least make sure she's taken care of._

_Love you man, and I miss you like crazy,_

_Eddie_

Leaning back and getting ready for the long haul, William took a long swig of his favorite Snapple and reached for the second letter. Hesitating, he wondered if he should just go ahead and call Eddie and skip ahead to the end, find out what was going on with his life, but he stopped himself. He wanted the unedited version. Eddie was notoriously closed mouth in person, but in his letters, he always seemed more willing to ask advice and share deep feelings. Deciding to read first, then call, he pulled out the second letter.

_Will,_

_So, it's been a while. I read your letter about that new village you're in and it sounds so sad. I don't know how you do it. But, since I know you won't be reading this for a while, I'm going to be a selfish jerk and talk about myself. I miss you and I could really use some advice right now. I know I won't be getting it anytime soon, but it just feels good to write, you know?_

_So anyway, I think I blew things with Janet. I told you she wasn't my usual type, right? I mean, I don't understand why I care so much what other people think? I think she's cute, you know, but the guys, I just have a sinking feeling they're gonna rag on me about it. I'm an asshole, I'm weak, and I know it. _

_So, I took her to Vito's. Remember that place? They got the best Veal Scalopini I've ever tasted, but what's more, it's far away from the Ridge. I wanted to get to know her better, outside the bar and I didn't want to be distracted. I wanted us to have a chance before people started trying to drag us down. She called me out on it though, that I was ashamed of being seen with her, but I was able to save my ass. It's not so much shame, as it is concern… I don't want people saying shit, about me, but more importantly, about her. I've pissed a lot of girls off around here and I know for sure they won't have a problem taking it out on Janet. So we had this great date, and when I went to take her home, I clutched. I wanted to kiss her, but I was so scared, I mean my palms were fucking sweating! I haven't felt like that since I was a kid and I damn sure wanted to make sure it was memorable, so I kissed her on the forehead instead and told her goodnight. She looked disappointed and I just felt like such a heel, you know? I just didn't want to mess up, I'm Eddie Latekka, for Chrissakes, I have an image to uphold. I can't be shaking in my boots like a little boy on prom night. _

_But still, she gave me another chance and here's where I really fucked up. I invited her to Owen's wife's Biday BBQ and then I stood her up. It was time to step out and be public, and I didn't have the guts. Now before you call me an idiot, I already know that. I fucked up and now, I'm sure she won't want to talk to me anymore. Not only do I think I really missed out on what could have been something good between us, I think I might have lost someone who was becoming a really good friend. Damn!_

_What can I do to fix this?? I ask, in the vain hope you might actually get this letter in time…_

_Pathetically yours,_

_Eddie_

_P.S. Ma had a bout with the flu, but she's better now. Sam (Hannah's son) was in the hospital for a while; he had a bad reaction from his peanut allergy. He's doing better and should be back to normal soon. Nicky's still here(big surprise there) and every time I turn around he's at my damn house._

William shook his head. If it didn't involve doing things the hard way, it wouldn't be classic Eddie. Anxious to learn more, he started to open the third letter. A jaw-cracking yawn took control of him and made him rethink starting a new one. In the morning, he promised himself. Pulling the covers over his head and burrowing into what felt like a little piece of heaven, he fell asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow.

……………………………………………….

**A/N: I know little of the Doctor's Without Borders Program; just that they are heroes. Please excuse any inaccuracies. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please R&R. Thanks, gg**


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

Allison slowly opened one eye, and then carefully opened the other. If she didn't move too quickly the nausea usually didn't hit her too bad, at least at first. Taking a deep breath, she braced herself for the violent roll of her stomach. When nothing happened, she took another, then another. Lifting herself up to a sitting position, she waited for the pitch and roll to start. Nothing. Breaking out into a huge smile, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and ran to the bathroom. Stripping out of her baggy pajama pants and tank top, she stepped out of her underwear and right into the warm needles of the shower. She felt glorious. Just like that, it was gone. Searching her mind, she realized she was a few weeks past 3 months along so the morning sickness should darn well be over!

Allison had a small frame and since she already had children, she could already see her stomach poking out. But today, today, she just felt sexy and alive again. She washed her hair (_had it been a few days since she'd done that?_) and scrubbed her whole body with her favorite body wash. Stepping out of the shower with a puff of steam behind her, she tiptoed into the bedroom and brazenly walked up to Owen's sleeping form on his side of the bed.

"Cranberry, it's time to wake up."

Owen groaned and rolled over. "Leave…me…please... just…five…more… minutes."

Allison stamped her foot impatiently. Sighing with resignation, she moved closer and bent over him to brush a feather light kiss on his cheek. _If she could just get him to open his eyes…_

"Sweetie, it really is time to wake up. I need you to do something."

Owen knew that smell. Somewhere in the far recesses of his brain, connections were made. She was showered and wearing her smelly stuff. She was on the wrong side of the bed. Wait, no… she was standing over him. Could she be feeling better? Was there a God? Opening his eyes, he immediately jumped to attention, literally and figuratively.

Letting out a low growl, not unlike a hungry bear, Owen lunged for her. Before she could react, Allison yelped as his big arms engulfed her and dragged her down into bed with him. "Whadaya need me to do baby?" He was already nibbling his way down her collarbone working his hands between her legs. He found her slick with anticipation.

"Me." She smiled at him invitingly; it had been almost two months since she had been in the mood. Owen glanced at the clock and thought: _to hell with work_. Today, he might just be calling in sick.

…………………………………………….

William's internal clock already seemed to be set back to Eastern Standard Time. Cussing; since he found no other way to vent his frustrations, he stomped out of bed and went to the bathroom. After taking care of business, he ran the water as cold as he could get it and splashed his face several times. Staring back at him was a man of a little more than average height, with sun-kissed blonde hair and piercing hazel eyes. He looked like Eddie, shorter and blonde, with a smaller frame that was finer tuned than his brother's. Whereas Eddie's body was naturally fit, William's was the result of constant workouts and weight training. Even in the depths of Africa, he managed to get in his daily jogs and workouts with makeshift weights. Padding barefoot back over to the bed, he picked up the phone and ordered room service for breakfast, and then he tucked in for the next letter.

_Will,_

_I'm glad to hear you're doing well. Your last letter said you were getting antsy and thinking of quitting early. I know you feel rewarded with what you do, but I sure do miss you bro. The goons are great, but sometimes, you just need your big brother, you know? Ma was asking for you again. She's not quite herself, but then they say MS does that to you. That last episode she had was really bad and left her in a bad way. But despite it all, she still manages to get a drink in. (can you feel the sarcasm in that statement?) I went to see her. She looked so frail and old, it was weird, you know? It's been so long since I've been to see her, and now I feel bad that I haven't. But as usual, she wanted nothing to do with me, blamed me for Dad leaving, for the billionth time and asked how you were doing, her angel. Oh well, what the hell you gonna do?_

At this part, William paused. His heart always broke a little every time Eddie got rejected by their mother. She blamed Eddie for their father leaving since he left shortly after Eddie was born. Her inability to face the fact that Frank Latekka was a no good bum had scarred her sons for life.

_I settled things with Janet; beyond settled. We had our first kiss! Okay, and now that I wrote that down, I feel like a total ass. What kind of man my age gets psyched about a kiss? Jesus, I must be losing it. Anyway, I was having a day, a bad one, you know? There was a whole lot of shit going on with the guys. Ikey was sleeping with O-Ro's wife and Nicky knew about it but didn't say nothing. So anyways, I'm having this bad day and she was who I wanted to see. I went into the bar under the guise of needing a beer, but what I really needed was her. I needed to hear her voice, listen to her advice, get her sympathy maybe. I'm not really sure, but I was drawn there, because I knew she had what I needed. It's weird, when I kissed her, finally kissed her and told her how she made me feel it was like coming home. And not that shithole we grew up in, but the warm kind, where there are cookies baking and a fire burning in the fireplace type home. She makes me happy. I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do with this, but I know that Janet Meadows, she makes me happy._

_Miss you buddy,_

_Eddie_

…………………………………………………

Ikey stretched and yawned himself awake. He could smell Darcy's French toast all the way from the bedroom. He heard the sizzle of bacon being put on the skillet and knew she always timed it so that everything would be fresh and hot by the time he got out of his shower. Deciding to break the rules today, he slipped out of bed, naked as the day he was born and strutted into the kitchen. Just in time to see the second batch go in, he walked up behind her and cradled her in his arms. Snatching a piece of bacon from the draining plate, he nibbled on it and offered her a bite.

"Good Morning Darce." He buried his face into her hair, as was becoming his habit and inhaled her scent.

"Ikey… you should be in the shower. We both got work in less than an hour and…" Hands roaming now, he quickly silenced her with his expertise. Turning off the fire, she quickly washed her hands and turned into him. Hoisting her up, he carried her back into the bedroom.

"Come on baby, we'll have breakfast in bed. In fact, there's something in particular I have an appetite for."

"But Ikey, what about the food… we'll be late for work… we can't just…"

"Hell yeah we can." And after that, Ikey proceeded to show her just how possible it was.

……………………………………………….

_Will,_

_Have you ever been in love? How the hell do you know if and when you are? How the fuck do you stop this feeling, when it feels so good but so scary all at the same time?_

_We've been seeing each other for months now. I took her to Homecoming with me a few months back. It was cool. I also kissed her in front of God, country and Knight's Ridge. I must admit, it was romantic and it really sealed the deal. I think she doubted me until then, but I needed to show her, to let her know that the other women weren't who I wanted anymore. It must be hard for her, having to deal with my rep. I mean, I wasn't exactly a choir boy before we started dating, you know? But the thing about Janet is that she never throws that in my face, ever. It's great to be respected and trusted like that._

_It's a day after Christmas and I thought about you a lot. I missed having you around, you know? I went to see Ma on Christmas Day and Janet went to Rhode Island to be with her grandparents. Her parent's died in a car accident when she was young, she doesn't have anyone else. But we spent Christmas Eve together though and I suspect that's when it may have happened. _

_First off, she gave me a wolf. Before you jump to all kinds of crazy conclusions… you'd be right. She actually gave me a wolf pup. She got it off this shady guy, Monk McGuillicuddy. Anyway, she thought it was a puppy and thought I would like it since Rocket died. I reacted a little strongly at first, you know Rocket's only been gone a few years, I didn't want another dog, but more so, I started to panic. It's like, if I take this dog, then I will always have a reminder of her. What if we break up? It was too much; I told her it was too soon. That's when I noticed the shape of its nose, the coloring and the teeth…or maybe I should say fangs. She was so fucking embarrassed; it was such a Janet moment. I think I'll remember that look on her face forever._

_Anyway, I saw her later that day and gave her my present, it was a charm bracelet. We met up in my truck 'cause this storm had blown in. I was plowing the streets and not really looking forward to being up all night to do it. She came with me. Missed out on some fancy dinner at Hannah's (her best friend... small world, huh?) and just rode with me half the night. She made me soup and hot cocoa. It was the most perfect, most considerate thing any woman has ever done for me. And it was effortless, you know, it was simply because she cared. I think I fell a little bit in love with her that night. I'm scared man, this is new and I'm not sure what to do. I wish you were here._

_Love ya,_

_  
Eddie_

………………………………………………

Nick struggled to keep his eyes closed against the blaring sunlight streaming in through Hannah's living room window. He had fallen asleep there, again, on her couch. Sometime in the middle of the night she must have covered him up and placed a pillow near him, which was now on the floor. The couch was long enough, but it was lumpy and where he really wanted to be, she had yet allowed him access to, her bed. He also doubted he wanted to share the same bed with her that Big Cat did; he had to think about that one. Laying there, hoping sleep would take back over, he heard the distinct creak of the stairs. Smiling to himself, he decided to snatch her when she walked by him on the way to the kitchen. Waiting a beat, he hesitated. It wasn't Hannah, it was Sam. What was he doing, standing over him like that? Deciding to wait and see, he kept his eyes closed, feigning sleep. Then, in an instant he felt a quick prick on scalp. What the hell?

"Ow! Sam, what gives?" Rubbing the spot on his head, Nick sits up looking at the boy who so clearly has his own dead mother's eyes.

"Nick! Oh, you're awake. Uh… there was something crawling in your hair…uh, I must have snatched out a hair or two trying to grab it. Sorry." Sam's eyes shifted from one spot to the next, never quite meeting Nick's. Something was up and Nick planned on getting to the bottom of things. Nick noticed Sam still held his fingers pressed together tightly as if trying to keep the hairs he snatched out.

Patting the couch next to him, he moved over to make space for Sam. "Come here, sit. Tell me why you need a strand of my hair." Nick wasn't a fool, he was already awake now and making the connections. He just wanted to hear it from Sam.

"I…" Sam was afraid. What if Nick got mad? What if Nick didn't want to know if he was his Dad or not? Come to think of it, he had never insisted on getting tested. Was that because he didn't want it to be the case or was it because he believed his mom? Deciding on bravery instead of cowardice, Sam Daniels continued. "I…I needed a sample from the root. For a test." Looking down in his lap now, he couldn't bring himself to look at Nick's face. What if he saw anger, or worse, rejection, how would he go on?

Nick struggled for composure. There weren't many times in his adult life that he felt tears roll down his cheeks, this was one of them. Nick was always careful about touching Sam. He wasn't sure why, maybe it was because he was afraid of wrapping his arms around Sam like a father would a son, and then knowing that right didn't officially belong to him. It was to protect himself. But this morning, something changed. Sam needed him and more so, he needed a hug. Lifting his arm up, he pulled Sam towards him and looked down on his straight brown hair. Hair the same color as his, but straight like Hannah's had been, until she decided to curl it all the time. Giving him a squeeze like the Commander would on rare occasions, he cleared his throat.

"I guess we need to talk about this. But I think we should all talk about it, including your mom." At the mention of Hannah, Sam started to fidget and pull away. Nick held on even tighter. "Sam, I know you have questions, and quite frankly so do I. I think it's pretty clear that both of us have doubts and want them either justified or put to rest. I've told you before, I don't know about the father of it all, but I really do want to be your friend. I hope I've been at least good at that part. But if I'm your dad, and I really hope I am, I hope you'll let me be. And If I'm your dad…" Nick was really crying now, the tears rolling uncontrollably from his eyes, "I hope you know how sorry I am about not being here to kiss every hurt you had and teach you all that father son stuff and…I hope you can forgive me. If I'm your dad, it's not your mother's fault that we didn't know about this, it's mine. I made a promise to her years ago and I broke it. If I've missed all these years I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive myself, but I hope that you might find it in your heart to forgive me."

Sam was crying too. Buried in Nick's shirt, neither of them noticed that Hannah had come down the stairs and was sitting at the bottom watching and listening this whole scene unfold. "What if you're not my dad, Nick? What does that mean?" Feeling a little bit of his heartbreak at the very thought of it, Nick kept holding Sam. Now that he had this boy, his boy, in his arms, he would never let him go. He only prayed that his blood ran through his veins as well.

"It means nothing but genetics. Listen, I'm going to tell you a secret. A long time ago I gave my heart to this little blond haired dynamo. She was tough and pretty all at the same time. I gave her my heart and she gave me hers. We ended up on the wrong paths separate from each other for a long time, but there was always a connection, at least for me anyway. So, now that we've gone our separate ways and explored and experienced, luck or fate, whatever you wish to call it, brought us back together at this time. I'm going to marry her Sam. We're going to be a family. It's not wishful thinking, I've thought it through and it's always been Hannah for me. If she says no, I'll just have to regroup and double my efforts. I love her, and Sam, I love you too." Rubbing his hand over the top of Sam's head, he soothed the boy until he was no longer crying. Sam's arms were around his waist holding on tight. Nick looked up just in time to see Hannah slip on the couch next to the both of them. She leaned her head on Sam's back and rubbed it soothingly.

"Ma?" There was so much asked and so much need in that one word.

"Yes baby." Taking a deep breath, Hannah continued. "It's going to be okay. There's no need for the test Sam, Nick is your father." Afraid to look at him, he lifted her face to his. Fresh tears sprang, and he whispered _thank you_. There was no anger, or resentment; just regrets.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

Eddie sat at his desk wondering when Nicky was going to get in to work. Business was doing well, especially with Big Cat out of commission. People worried about their projects being finished on time and if they didn't have a contract already signed with Ray, they had jumped ship and come to Best Friend Windows. It was a sweet turn of events and Eddie felt none too badly for Big Cat. As far as he was concerned the asshole owed him more than just a few accounts.

He should have been working on his paperwork, but his mind kept drifting back to the smie fight he had with Janet this morning.

"Eddie, do you think your brother will like me? Will he be able to get back for the wedding next year? What about your Mom?"

"What about her?"

"Eddie, she's your Mom. You go see her every now and again, surely you care about her…"

"No Janet, she gave me life, for that I'm always grateful and in her debt, but she's not my Mom. I go see her because Will asked me to look after her while he's away. I don't have a Mom as far as I'm concerned."

"But Eddie, she's sick…" Eddie sliced his hand through the air as if to cut her off.

"No Janet. She's sick, that's true, but she's also an alcoholic and she's just plain mean. It means nothing to her that I'm in love or doing well in life. All she's ever cared about was Will and the fact that my dad left. She's always blamed me and I don't want that kind of negativity on our special day." Running his hand through his hair as was his habit when he was irritated or nervous, he finished. "Don't push me on this Janet, please. Baby, I love you and I respect that you care for me, but this is not what I want. No surprises at the last minute, no secret invitations, no little set-ups behind my back. I don't want her there. I really don't. Please, respect my feelings on this."

"But Eddie…"

"Janet, I said NO!" Instant shock registered on Janet's face. There was such a wall up in front of him right now, it was impenetrable. He regretted the way he shouted at her the instant he did it.

"Baby, I'm sorry." Gathering her in his arms, he brushed a hand over her hair in a soothing manner. "She brings out the worst in me, I swear. It's no good for anyone involved if she's there. She'll end up making you and me both feel like shit before the day is over. You deserve better than that any day of the week, but especially on our wedding day; and quite frankly Janet, so do I." Hugging her one more time, he picked up his keys and left for work.

Eddie worried about Will's reaction to his not wanting to invite their mother to the wedding. He knew Janet would ride him tonight about specifics. He had managed in their year together and their four years of friendship before that to evade anything but surface questions about his mother. But he knew now she would want to know everything. He would have to bare his soul, God help him, in order to make her understand why his mother couldn't be a part of his life anymore. He knew he would get Janet to understand, Will would be a different story. Eddie searched his mind. It just occurred to him that he hadn't heard from his brother in well over three months. Knitting his brows in concern, he promised himself that he would give Will's letter a few more days and if he hadn't heard from his brother by then, he would contact the Doctor's without Border's Program.

…………………………………….

_Will,_

_So, I think I'm going out of my fucking mind. I haven't gotten laid in months, I mean MONTHS! At first I was talking it slow, you know? I mean, I really like Janet, and I have a sinking feeling I'm in love with her. I'm just afraid to take that last step. Afraid I'm going to want to leave afterwards like I always do, and she doesn't deserve that. I mean, she's the first girlfriend I've had since Rory, and I don't think I felt half for Rory what I'm feeling for Janet right now. _

_Phiz just called me out on it this morning. I mean, if anyone notices I ain't getting laid, it's gonna be him. I spend all my free time at Janet's, but I always leave, never spent the night. I'm getting tired of dodging her though, I mean, I don't want her to get a complex about it. She hasn't pushed the issue and part of me wonders if she's a virgin. She told me once that she had never been in a serious relationship before and now I wonder if that means she's never had sex either. I don't know, I'm afraid to bring it up, but to use Nicky's term, it's like the 800 pound gorilla riding side-saddle on the pink elephant in the room. When we're together, you can cut the sexual tension with a fucking knife, and it's not just on my side. _

_If I'm totally honest with myself I think what I'm really afraid of is what it means when we finally do have sex and I__** don't**__ want to leave afterwards. I have some decisions to make and they gotta happen soon._

_Yours,_

_  
Eddie_

In that same envelop there was a shorter letter enclosed. William smiled because he knew what was coming.

_Will,_

_Well, Janet made up my mind for me. I don't think there is any other way to describe it other than the fact that I was threatened; plain and simple. Sure she wrapped it in this veneer of watching movies and eating popcorn, but what she basically told me was put out or get out. Damn. It was sexy as hell._

_But more so, it was… wow. I mean, I was nervous, she was nervous, but once we finally started, we had fun. I know that sounds weird, but Janet and me in bed, that first time? I'll never forget it. We laughed a lot and just really enjoyed each other. She's definitely got some moves on her too; let me tell you, which sure as hell surprised me. I figure she can't have been a virgin the way she was moving around the bedroom. So that first time was fantastic, almost like an icebreaker, you know? Then, I can say that second time, we made love. I don't think I've ever actually made love before, I mean, really put my feelings into it, and there I was, being destroyed by this five foot two woman who, cast this spell on me. _

_I can honestly say now that I'm in love. I'm not ready to tell her yet, I gotta sit on it a while, you know? Get a feel for how I feel about it. Get used to it, so when I tell her, I'm comfortable with where it leads us, what it means. You know?_

_Love ya,_

_Eddie_

……………………………………..

Ikey's day started out beautifully. He made love to his girlfriend, had a wonderful, yet cold breakfast and walked hand in hand in to work, until they had to go their separate ways. The trees were changing colors and the birds seemed to be singing. All was well in his world. He stepped through the threshold of Cataldo Builders and immediately knew by the look on the foreman's face that his day was about to take a turn for the worse.

……………………………………..

Steve was in the kitchen, making himself a big hearty breakfast when he thought heard a faint knock at the door. Ignoring it, figuring it was a random sound from outdoors, he continued to whisk his eggs and melt his butter for his western omelet. The knock came louder this time, leaving no doubt there was someone at his door at nine in the morning. Turning off the fire and wiping his hand on a nearby towel he sprinted over to the door. Pulling the door open without so much a check to see who it was, all air expelled from his lungs at the sight of Emily.

She stood there, her hair short and shiny. She must have taken those braids out, he thought to himself. The hairstyle suited her, it was reminiscent to the way Halle Berry wore her hair when she first got famous, but just more up-to-date. She wore a bright red cowl-turtleneck and light grey wool slacks. A trim black leather belt at her waist and high-heeled leather boots completed the outfit. Well, not quite, she had a travel bag in her hand. Steve was hoping she was planning on staying with him, at least for a few days.

"So, I have a question for you? Are you in love with me?" This is when Steve noted that his beautiful Emily wasn't smiling, she was pissed off.

"Uhhhhh…"

"This isn't a hard question Steve, it's either yes or no. Are you in love with me?"

Steve started to panic, why was she so angry? Was she angry because she didn't want him to be in love with her? Was it too fast? Should he just tell her the truth? Opting for the truth he mumbled his answer, afraid she would walk away out of fear of the intensity of his feelings.

"Yeah, I kinda am. I'm sorry Emily, I know you didn't want me to…"

She cut him off. "Then why the fuck are we living apart?" She launched herself at him, wrapping her arms and legs around him simultaneously. He wasn't prepared and they fell back, hard, on the floor behind him. She kicked the door shut with her foot and started ripping his clothes off right in the middle of the foyer. Kissing him wildly, she whispered in his ear, "I love you too baby. I missed you something awful." Steve's shock finally abated and he wrapped his arms around her tightly, slowing her down, calming her down.

"Stop… baby… just one minute." Taking a shuttering breath, he ran his hands up and down her back to calm her passion. "I need to hear that again, just one more time, please?"

Sucking her teeth in disgust, she rolled her eyes. "You're gonna be one of those types, eh? Fine…" Looking him dead in the eye she repeats herself. "I love you Steve. I _love_ you." Then she broke into a huge smile that lit the room around them. Stroking the underside of her glorious breasts he started to warm her back up again.

"Yeah, that was what I needed. Damn, I missed you Emily. I missed you like hell. I was coming; I was coming to get you. Be with you, live at your doorstep until you told me you felt the same way too. I'll move to Chicago, if that's what you want. Anything, as long as we're together."

Smiling at him she shook her head. She took such pleasure in knowing he would be willing to give up his entore life to be with her, since she was about to do the same. "It's okay, I got a transfer to the Boston office. I have to commute twice a week, but the rest of the time, I can work from home."

"Home?" Smiling giddily, he starts taking her belt and top off. "And where would that be?" He had her stripped to her bra and was working on her pants as they spoke.

"Well, I didn't come all this way to live with my mama!" Laughing, he pulled her to her feet and then swept her off of them. He carried her upstairs to what would from now be referred to as their bedroom and made love until it was time for him to leave for work.

……………………………………………

Ikey walked into to Best Friend Windows, glad he had somewhere to go. He wasn't ready to face Darcy and he didn't want to go back to his place, where he would probably just drink himself drunk. Eddie was on the phone but waved him in and motioned for him to sit down until he was done.

"Yeah, about this morning, uh…." Eddie glanced at Ikey and then shrugged his shoulders as if to say, 'what the hell.' "I'm sorry about the way I reacted. Mention of my mother almost always gets a rise out of me. I'm sorry Janet."

Eddie was quiet as he listened on the other end of the phone, nodding his head and saying a lot of 'uh-huh's.' Finally he spoke one last time.

"Thanks baby, yeah, I'll see you later. Love you too, bye." Ikey could only shake his head in awe. Eddie Latekka was, well, tamed for lack of a better word. Breaking into a slow grin, he got ready to razz him a little. Anticipating his intentions, Eddie jumped at it first. "You'll be saying that shit to Darcy before you know it. You'll turn around and be as completely whooped as I am. Mark my words, Ikey. Laugh now, but I always get the last laugh."

"Aight, true enough Eddie. I can't even deny that." Face turning somber, Ikey clears his throat. "Uhhhh, I got a problem Eddie. I got let go today from Cataldo. They said things were slowing down, you know and well, I was hoping…" Eddie cocked his head to the side and tried to hold back his grin. He knew it must have taken a lot of guts for Ikey to walk in here asking for a job. Things had been a little strained since Eddie fired him from the landscaping business, but as far as Eddie was concerned that was ll water under the bridge.

"Say no more Ikey, I was wondering when you would leave that place and start helping us out here. Listen, between this place and the landscaping jobs I got left, business has been good. Nicky and I were talking about taking on a person permanently, I guess we found him."

Ikey never quite got over being forgiven by his friends. It always amazed him they could tolerate his presence. "Really? I mean, I never thought you'd want to work together again, I mean after what happened…"

"I was pissed at the time Ikey, we say things we don't mean when we're pissed." Eddie stood up and reached his hand across the desk. The two shook hands. "Welcome to Best Friend Windows."


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: It's been a while Roadies, I know. ****Okay, for all of you who don't remember, here's a recap. This started out after the series finale. At this point in the story Jeddie is back together and engaged. We have met Eddie's brother William, a doctor who has spent the last two years in Africa with Doctors without Borders. William is currently reading old letters from Eddie that he couldn't receive while he was away and is catching up on Eddie's life. He is just now reading about Janet's infidelity. Nick has just found out he's Sam's father and Big Cat is at home with Christine, recovering from an ass whupping from Nick for hurting Hannah. Physical Phil has left the house and is back in school and we now know that Pizza girl's name (in my story) is Penny. Emily (the Dean's daughter a new character) is involved with Officer Steve (Black police officer from S1E1 that we from the October Road Boards collectively named) and she has just come back to the Ridge from Chicago to give love a try. Ronnie and Aubrey are together, and Ikey has a girlfriend (who you might remember from season 1) named Darcey. The Dean and Commander got married and the Commander has been living cancer free for a few months now. Allison is pregnant with Owen's third child and they are trying to make it work. **

**Chapter 33**

His little brother was in love was all William could think. He was so happy for him and worried for him all at the same time. He knew first hand that loving someone could lead to heartache and pain juts as easily as it led to that blissful feeling you got just by seeing that person look your way. William hadn't been in love for many years now, but he realized, reading Eddie's letters that he missed the feeling. Maybe it was time to open himself up to the possibility again.

_Will,_

_So, I started a new business. Big Cat started stealing my customers, outbidding me for jobs and well, I was pretty much backed into a corner. Nicky had this hair-brained idea to start Best Friend Windows (ten and a half years late) to kinda give him the finger. Needless to say, I didn't react positively at first, I mean, he left and didn't look back. He didn't give a damn about Hannah about me, about the promises he made. Do I really wanna go into business with such a selfish self-centered son of a bitch? Well, it turns out, I really don't have much of a choice. And besides... I think we kinda made our peace with each other. _

_So, long story short, I'm now in the Window, Doors and Floors business. My landscaping business is so slow, I had to do something. I'm excited about it. The place looks great, really professional and it's laid out exactly the way I envisioned it. We even did a commercial. It's really local, and really embarrassing, but, hey, it's out there. I enclosed a dvd copy of it that Phyz burned for you. I hope you get a chance to watch it, at least to laugh at me later. _

_Things with Janet are going really well, I love her, I just haven't told her yet. To be totally honest with you, I don't know what's holding me back form telling her now. I'm scared I guess, I don't know._

_Miss you man, I can't wait to be able to tell you all of this shit face to face._

_Eddie_

…………………………………….

Nick Garrett was a happy man. In one morning, he gained a son and was hopeful to gain a fiance. His business was going well, partially in thanks to Big Cat's convalescence, and his relationship with his brother was on the mend. He had a new stepmother and stepsister that he adored and the sun was shining brightly over the Ridge with the beautiful fall colors as the background. After walking Sam to school, Nick decided he had someone he really needed to share his joy with. Yes, Nick Garret was a happy man and he could think of no one better to share his joy with than his mother.

"Sorry it's been so long Ma, I've been sidetracked."

He paused to gather his thoughts then continued, "She finally told me the truth; a truth I've known deep down in my gut since the first time I found out she had a son that was ten years old. Since I found out he had a peanut allergy, since Dad saw you in his eyes. She finally told me Ma, and now, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to both of them. I wasn't there. I'm going to try to be the man you raised me to be; I'm not going to run. I'm going to stick and I'm going to love them with everything I got."

Nick shifted on the pedestal and took in the scenery around him. It really was a beautiful day and he said as much. "You should see the trees today Ma, picture perfect. They're all changing color; reds, yellows, greens, there's even some purple and pink in there. The sun is so bright and warm on your face. Pumpkin Fest is right around the corner. Don't worry, I won't be serenading anyone this time around." He laughed at himself before continuing.

"Hannah is going to marry me. I haven't asked her yet, but it's gonna happen soon and when it does, she'll say yes; I'm sure of it. I never should have left her behind; I should have come back and begged her to come with me. It was just so hard being here everyday without you Ma. Sometimes I thought I'd go crazy. But if I had at least come back and explained that to her, I would have known about Sam." Running his hands through his hair, he let the tears fall again for what felt like the hundredth time. "All the people who got hurt because I was afraid to face the Ridge without you; Dad, Ronnie, Eddie, Hannah and Sam, they have all forgiven me. It's a miracle."

"The wedding was beautiful. I know it sounds strange, but I think you would really like Leslie. She's classy and full of education, but not snooty, you know. She's okay with drinking a beer and walking around in a ratty robe. It hurt at first, seeing Dad laughing and smiling with someone else, but then I think that's what you'd want. But I want you to know that no one could ever replace you Ma, I love you and I miss you, everyday." He paused and smiled before saying the last thing, "Give my regards to Steve McQueen." Standing up, he places a single yellow rose on Caroline Garret's tombstone and bends down to kiss it. Feeling lighter in step, he whistles his way out of the cemetary; it's time to tell the Commander he has a grandson.

………………

"Hey Nicky, it's me. Look, I don't know when you're planning on haul your ass in to work, but we got things to do here buddy. We just got two new accounts today, one of which is over at the Presbyterian Church on Adams. They want glass block windows installed in the basement within the next three days. It's shouldn't be a problem as long as you actually show up. Give me a call buddy. Oh and yeah, we have a new employee, he's a bum and you can't ever leave your wife alone with him, but he's a hard worker." Eddie winked over at Ikey. Ikey relaxed, it was the first time anyone had joked about what happened. It was at that moment that he knew he was finally and fully back into the fold.

……………………………

Janet sat at home unmotivated to do her usual cleaning. Eddie had been really good as of late, picking up after himself and throwing in a load of laundry every now and again. She just didn't have that much to do! So she sat down and began to brood. She hadn't seen Eddie that angry sicne she told him about sleeping with Rooster. At least this time she knew his anger wasn't directed at her. He quickly masked it, but it was there, simmering beneath the surface. He was spot on when he suggested that she might "surprise" him with his mother being there. Janet was orphaned and only had her grandparents, she couldn't imagine not wanting to see your mother if it was at all possible. But it was clear he didn't want to and Janet was now faced with the daunting task of asking Eddie why. She knew he didn't like to share his feelings, and she knew his mother was an alcoholic, but that's all she knew. Janet had hoped in time, he would be more forthcoming, but it didn't happen. So now, she would have to push Eddie, something she dreaded doing. Because when you pushed Eddie Latekka, sometimes, he came out fighting.

……………………………….

Penny sat on the floor of Phil's bathroom. When moments like this happened, it was best to just sit down and take it all in. She glanced across the room at the offending article. It looked harmless; small enough to slip in your pocket, easy to use, and easy to read. But the information it would tell you, now that packed a punch. In fact she sat on the floor pondering what other small objects could relay information that would undoubtedly change your life and she came up short. She jumped at the sound of her timer. Graceful as a ballerina, she unfolded her legs and in two steps made it over to the test. Then Penny said something she rarely ever said.

"Well shit."

……………………………………

Emily drove Steve into work promising to pick him up after his shift was over at 11. She decided to go to the deli and get some sandwiches for lunch to share with her mom at the Duff. She knew her mother rarely took a break for lunch, but figured the surprise at seeing her daughter would help her break with tradition. Waiting in line at Murph's, she scanned the place for familiar faces. When she heard the bell jingle over the front door, she turned to look and was face to face with Nick.

"Whaaaa…?" Nick was overjoyed to see her and totally surprised.

"Big Brother!!!" Emily squealed and launched herself into his arms.

"So you finally decided to come back, huh? Are you going to stick this time?"

"Look who's talking?" She replied sassily.

"Touche. But really, what gives?"

"I needed to come back. This thing with Steve, I had to see where it was going, you know? I moved in with him this morning. I love him Nick. I'm scared, but I was more scared of not loving him, of not being near him than I was of getting hurt."

"I know. I think we all knew, except you that is." She nodded her head as he continued, "Hannah finally told me Sam is mine. You're the first person I've told, other than my mom."

Touching a hand to his cheek she bloomed into a smile. "Oh sweetie, that's wonderful. I'm really happy for you. That Sam is a hoot. I can see so much of you in him. So wait, you haven't told your dad?"

"I only found out this morning!"

"What do you say you call him and have him meet us at mom's office, and then we can surprise them with your news and mine?"

"That sounds great Em. I'm so glad you're home." Nick pulled her in once again for a long hug and Emily sighed, because she really did feel like she was home.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

_Will,_

_I'm going just a little crazy here. I mean, I can't even believe I'm writing this. It's not even real to me that this happened, but it has and I'm writing this and I don't even know where to start._

_I guess I'll just rip off the Band-Aid and say it; Janet cheated on me. She slept with this asshole she works with and threw every goddamn thing we had out the fucking window__ ... hell, maybe I even helped, I'm not sure. All of it's kinda cloudy right now, probably the pain meds I'm on._

_So first off, not more than a month ago, I got my ass kicked by this local asshole that was gunning for me. When I say ass whooping, I don't mean your everyday bar fight, I mean your I-ended-up-in-the-hospital-and-will-be-pressing-charges type ass whooping. I knocked Matt on his ass a few weeks earlier for making some smart ass comment about Janet, so I knew he was looking to get back at me. I never thought it would be so dirty and out of the blue. He jumped me with some other guys in the back of my store. I'm messed up pretty bad; broken ribs, bruised face, swollen eye. But the worst part? While I'm getting pummeled for having protected Janet's honor in the first place she's out banging some other guy. I mean, what the hell is the world coming to? _

_Okay. It felt good to write that. More? More. Okay, she thought I was leaving her, she thought I was with Rory again, she saw us kissing and thought it was over and she turned to Rooster (what the hell kind of name…) for comfort. She didn't trust in us enough to even ask me what goes on._

_I wasn't kissing Rory, she was kissing me. No, wait, that's not true. I might as well be honest, we kissed. She came back into town and things got a little confusing for me. I didn't tell Janet she was in town because I knew she would get insecure about it, you know. I think that is where I went wrong. Well, and the kiss too. But I stopped it, and it meant nothing, I FELT nothing. And I would have told all of this to Janet, but on my way to see her, I got jumped. So while I was lying in an alley bleeding to death, Janet was out fucking around on me. Ain't life grand?_

_I don't know Will, I'm sure I have some part of the blame here. _

_I was going to tell her I loved her that night. After what almost happened with Rory and after finding a copy of her house keys in my lunch that she packed for me that morning, I was going to tell her I loved her. I think that's why it hurts so much. I was almost there, WE were almost there. It was like true happiness was just within our grasp and then, BAM!_

_Miss you man,_

_Eddie_

Will sat up in his bed. After reading then rereading the letter he felt terrible. His little brother needed him and he wasn't there. Disregarding the last letter on the bed, he decided it was time to go check on Eddie. Knowing his brother, a blow like this could lead him down and very dark path. He was afraid to open the last letter, knowing it might hold even worse news.

He packed his bags and did a last check around the room, making sure he hadn't forgotten anything. First, he would need to go to his storage facility and get his bike, and then he would head out to the Ridge. Looking at the sky, noting it was a clear and beautiful day, he figured if he started out now, he would make it in time for dinner.

* * *

Hannah walked around her house. So many memories lived in the walls. It was the house she grew up in, experienced her first love, her first time making love and her first heartache. She raised her son in this very same house; she had even had various other boyfriends here, namely Ray Cataldo. Sitting down on the sofa she knew so well, she looked around and decided it was time for some new memories, for a new start. She wanted that with Nick. After telling him the truth, finally telling him, she felt no resentment from him and surprisingly, felt none towards him. It had always been Nick and it would always be Nick. She wondered now if they would finally trust in each other enough to make it work this time. Glancing at the clock, she decided to take a walk over to Janet's house. It had been so long since she could talk, really talk with her best friend and now that her and Ray were over, she hoped to be able to mend that fence too. If Nick could forgive her, surely Janet and Eddie could too? Grabbing her keys, she jogged out the front door towards Janet's place.

……………………………………………..

Hearing the jingle from the bells over the front door, Eddie and Ikey looked up from their task. They were hauling boxes of glass block in from the storeroom hoping to get a start on the job in the early afternoon. Nick walked in, all smiles.

"Sorry I blew off work today man."

"That's okay, you're just in time to help Ikey with this…"

"No can do Ed, I just came in to get something out of my desk."

"Nicky, what the hell…"

"Eddie, I promise, I'll explain in a few hours, I gotta talk to the Commander and Leslie first. Can we meet at the Commander's around 7:30 tonight? I got something to tell you and the guys, bring the girls too. Can you tell Phys and Owen?"

"But, Nicky…."

"Gotta run Eddie, 7:30, the Commander's, just be there. I promise I'll explain everything." And with that, Nick ran out the front door of Best Friends Windows. For a fleeting moment, Eddie wondered if Nick was planning on leaving again. Shaking off that grim feeling, he caught Ikey staring at him.

"Not even employed with us for three hours and already slacking… get back to work Eichorn!"

"Eddie, I'm sure Nick isn't leavin'. He wouldn't do that."

Eddie looked at Ikey mystified. It wasn't the first time Ikey had read his thoughts, and he was sure it wouldn't be the last. "Let's just get this done Ikey, and then later, we'll see what we see."

……………………………………………..

Allison had a lot to do. Since she had been feeling so ill the past month and a half, Owen had been doing the cooking and the shopping. He tried his best to clean the house to her liking and he took the kids to and from school, leaving work early just to do so. He had been solicitous and had pampered her, just as he had when she was pregnant with Caitlin and Conner. She still found herself in awe of his ability to forgive. Having done so much for her these past weeks, she decided it was time to do the same for him. She ran to the grocery store and stocked up on all the necessities. Then she ran over to the beer section and got his favourite brand, so it would be nice and cold when he came home. She went to the butcher down on Adams to get a really nice pot roast; she would slow cook it with parsnips, potatoes and carrots with a nice au jus just the way he liked it.

Driving home, her cell phone rang.

"Hey cranberry."

"Hey honey, Nicky's called some kind of a meeting tonight."

Allison immediately felt deflated. All the plans she had, and now he was going to go out? Trying to hold on to her temper, she replied in a very saccharine voice. "Oh really?"

Totally oblivious to her shift in mood, Owen continued. "Yeah, apparently he wants us all there about 7:30 and he told us to bring you guys too, wives, girlfriends. I don't know what's going on, but it sounds important. Do you think we could find a sitter for tonight? I know its short notice…"

Cutting him off, Allison relents because it did sound important. It was so rare that the guys included the women in any of their gatherings; she decided to chill, as Emily would have told her and go with the flow. "I'll see who I can find, since he didn't say otherwise, if push comes to shove, we can bring the kids along with some toys and they can hang out in one of the bedrooms while the grownups talk. Don't worry about it."

"Thanks cranberry. You're the greatest. How are you and junior feeling today? Still keeping the nausea at bay?"

"So far so good."

"Glad to hear it. Look, I'll see you around 4:30, I think I'm going to head out early, okay?"

"Great, I'll see you then."

Allison pulls into the driveway and runs in the door, she called another mom from the school and asked if she would take the kids afterschool until about 7:15. Next she called their sitter to ask if she wouldn't mind staying with them for a few hours that evening. She wanted to have a nice quiet dinner with Owen before they went over to the Commander's house. She knew Eileen was surprised at her call and request to take the kids, but she didn't care. She was always helping out other moms, it was time she called in a few favors. Everyone knew Allison Rowen rarely asked for help. But today, she would.

She scrubbed the house; the wood gleamed and the floors were so shiny she was afraid to walk on them. Even though it was just slightly chilly, she made a fire in the fireplace. She lit candles and set the table with a crisp white table cloth. One of the things Owen said he loved about her was her ability to make a house a home. He loved coming home; he loved the smells and the atmosphere she set. So even though she wasn't a hundred percent, she did all these things for her husband, she gave him one hundred and ten, because she loved him and by some small miracle, he loved her right back.

Owen could smell the pot roast as soon as he turned the corner. Just as he knew every curve of Allison's body, knew every corner of his house, he knew her cooking and could identify it a mile away. It was the care and the love she put into it, he was sure, that always made it easy to identify. Smiling, knowing he was coming home, he pulled into the driveway and made a quick blast on the horn. Like clockwork, the front door opened and Allison, hair gleaming and belly rounded from the new life, ran out the front door to greet him. It was old fashioned, it was corny, but it was their thing. Going with the flow of it all, he picked her up and twirled her around, letting his lips find hers for a sweet welcome home kiss.

………………………………………………

"Hey Penny, are you here?" Phil called out hoping to share his first day of classes with the love of his life. She had saved him, it was that simple. And though gratitude made up a portion of his feelings for her, it wasn't the sole reason he was in love with her. She was funny, and kind and sexy, and goofy and she made him a better person, every single day they were together. He called her name again; sure she was there because he could smell her perfume in the air, too strong to just be a memory. Stepping into the bathroom doorway, smiled when he spotted her on the floor, then his smile faltered.

"There you are Pen…" She looked up at him from the bathroom floor with the pregnancy test in her hand. She started to speak, but the tears clogged her throat.

"I….I'm… we're…"

"Pregnant?!"

"Phil…I… I don't even know how. What I mean to say is, I know _how_ but, we've always been so careful and I just didn't even think that this could have happened."

Phil stood rooted to the spot he was in. Speechless. Pregnant, Penny was pregnant. It should have been a simple feeling; finding out the woman you love is carrying your child, but it seemed nothing was ever simple for Phil Farmer. He looked down at Penny, her face so full of hope and fear, and he just didn't have the words. His pulse started racing and he broke into a sweat. It was usually the feeling he would get when he attempted to leave the house. But this time it was different. The walls started to close in on him, and air seemed to get sucked out of the room. He simply turned and walked away. He went down the stairs, grabbed his light jacket and walked out the front door; all the while Penny calling his name, heartbroken by his silence.


	35. Chapter 35

**The Blowback Chapter 35**

Janet put the last of the morning dishes in the dishwasher. Nothing to do at home, she decided it was a nice enough day for a walk. Maybe it would help organize her thoughts and show her the best way to getting Eddie to open up about his childhood. Distracted, she didn't notice that Hannah was walking up her walkway until she was already on the front steps. Mixed feeling rushed to the surface. She felt initial pleasure, and then it was coated with a heavy dose of disappointment and even some anger. Even though she had rushed to Hannah's aide with the Big Cat situation, Janet was still angry with her friend. Mustering up as much a smile as she could, she opened the door.

"Hannah? What a surprise!?"

Hannah knew Janet's fake smile, having been best friends with her for well over ten years, she knew all of her faces. Slightly discouraged, she pressed on as anyway.

"We used to be best friends, and there used to be a time where me coming over on your day off wasn't such a surprise. I miss you Janet and I'm sorry. Can I come in so we can talk?" Hannah stood there looking so hopeful, Janet just didn't have it in her to be mean. Stepping aside, Hannah entered Janet's home for the first time since their Sunday brunch with the girls.

……………………………………………….

Nick was laughing all the way up the stairs in the administration building. Emily was recounting some funny story about moving her stuff from her Chicago apartment and putting it in storage. When they reached the door to the Dean's office, he quickly sobered.

Touching his cheek, Emily calmed his nerves. "This is _good_ news Nick. The Commander is going to be so happy. Besides, me coming home will make them even happier. Don't be nervous big brother." Blowing out a breath, he rapped lightly before turning the knob.

"Hey son, we were just starting to wond…EMILY!" The Commander took two long strides to his step-daughter and gathered her into a big bear hug. Immediately pried apart, Leslie has dragging her into another hug before Emily could get a word out.

"Guys, it's so great to see you. Mommy, I'm home… I'm, I'm going to stay. Give this thing with me and Steve a try…" Tears spilling from both women, the Commander looked over to Nick to give him a knowing wink. That is when he noticed the uncomfortable look on his face.

"Nicky, if you're about to tell me you're leaving…"

"Leaving? No Dad, it's nothing like that." Settling them all down, Nick started telling them the news.

………………………………………………

Phil walked aimlessly for blocks thinking about the earth shattering news Penny had just given him. He couldn't wrap his mind around it. Sure he knew it was his, he had no doubts about her fidelity, and he was old enough to understand there were no guarantees when it came to birth control. What he couldn't seem to understand is what divine power would think there was any way shape or form he was ready for a baby. He just started leaving the house, for goodness sake. Spotting a city bench, he plopped himself down, trying hard to figure out just what the hell they were going to do.

Meanwhile, Penny waited and waited for Phil to come back. After twenty painful minutes it became apparent to her that he wasn't. Heartbroken and alone, she collected her things and left.

…………………………………………………

"That's a wrap Ikey. I'm gonna run home and clean up before we go over to Nicky's." Eddie was also hoping he might be able to coax Janet into a quickie before they left the house. Already turned on at the very idea of it, he made quick work of packing up his tools.

Ikey was doing some final sweeping of the area's debris when he paused and looked at Eddie. "You think Nicky would be okay with Darce coming too? I mean it's not like she's my fiancé or wife or anything, but…."

"Ikey, I'm sure Nick won't mind, he said bring the girls, and last time I checked, Darcey was one of them."

"Yeah, true dat, okay, I'll see you over there. Hey Eddie, thanks again for this… the job… it's been…"

Eddie cut him off before it got sloppy. "Don't mention it Ikey. That's what friends are for. Besides, you're a natural at this kinda stuff. See you later buddy." With a final slap on the back, Eddie headed towards his truck.

……………………………………………………

Will pulled to a stop in front of Sully's. He was so tempted to go inside and see if he could catch a glimpse of the woman who broke his baby brother's heart. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts he kicked his bike into gear and rode on to 32 Gelsen. It had been a long time since he had come home to the Ridge and even though it held some bittersweet memories, it still felt like home.

Taking the front steps two at a time, he rapped quickly on the door and waited. At the very least he knew Phyz would be home to let him in. Getting impatient, he knocked again, this time a little more aggressively. When after a few minutes, no one answered he started to worry. Phil was a shut in who also was known to be a light sleeper. Even if he was napping, he would have awoken by now. Will decided that something must be wrong. He walked around the house, peering through windows and trying to see if any of them were unlocked. Having found success with the side den window, he pushed it open and then tried to pull himself up over the window sill. Ass in the air and torso halfway in the house he heard the distinctive cock of a gun.

"Alright buddy, just come out nice and slow with your hands where I can see them. Nice and slow…"

Easing himself out the window with his hands braced on the side of the sill, he turns slowly to explain himself. Before he could get a word out, Steve immediately recognizes him.

"Son of a bitch! William Latekka!!!! Why the hell didn't you say something" Steve immediately holsters his weapon and strides over to Will. The two guys embrace and start laughing.

"Sorry Stevie, I was worried about Phyz, I banged on the door a few minutes and there was no answer, and you know he's always home. Come on, give me a boost back up so I can get in there and make sure he's okay."

Already shaking his head and laughing Steve explains that Physical Phil is a shut-in no more.

"You're kidding?? Well that's damn good news. Best I've heard in a while. I guess I've been out of touch too long. Hey, have you seen Eddie? I just got back in the country two days ago and was trying to catch up with him. I'm worried about him, you know since he broke up with this girlfriend of his. He hasn't been spending any time in the holding cells has he?"

The look on Steve's face immediately changed to one of concern. "Janet and Eddie have a fight or something? I haven't seen them for a couple days, but I haven't heard anything."

"Them? As in, together? Did they get back together? Last letter I read he said she stepped out on him…"

"That's ancient history man, they're back together stronger than ever…" Steve hesitated, wondering if it was his place to tell Will the good news. Deciding it wasn't, he continued. "Uh, you haven't talked to him yet?"

"No, I was going to surprise him, why? What else don't I know?"

"I'll leave that to him to tell you… It's damn good to see you back here man. Look it's almost seven. Everyone is meeting over at the Commander's place in half an hour. Nick has some news. You'll find Eddie, Janet and the whole crew there. I was heading there myself before I got this disturbance call. It's my dinner break. Come on; let's go so you can see your baby brother."

………………………………………………..

"It was like I could see myself and all the mistakes I was making, all the lies I was telling to myself but I couldn't stop. I was so afraid Janet. Until Ray literally had his hands around my neck, I just couldn't bring myself to leave. I never thought I could become so lost again and yet there I was. All I could think was how stupid and blind I had been. I mean, I know Ray and I know hearing about me and Nick at the wedding was probably his breaking point, and a small part of me understands that. But all the stuff before, what he did directly and indirectly to Eddie; there was just no excuse that I stayed; no excuse at all. I'm so sorry Janet I hope that after all of this we can rebuild on what we had."

"I don't know Hannah, I mean, I love you, you're like family, but going back just seems impossible." She waited a beat and then continued, "Maybe… maybe we can start anew. You know, work our way back to being friends again, real friends. But before we can do that, you have someone else to talk to and apologize to…"

"I know. I was hoping we could talk tonight, after Nick shares our news with you guys."

"Wait, your news? Hannah, are you…?"

"What? No! Nothing like that, although I wouldn't mind it with Nick… he's going to let you all know that Sam is his son. I finally told him the truth." Wincing, she searched Janet's face for anger, "I guess I'm finally telling you too."

"Hannah, just about everyone knew that Nick had to be Sam's dad, but I'm glad you finally had the courage to say so. Don't worry about how I feel. How did Nick take it?"

"He loves me Janet. I never thought… I mean, he wasn't even angry, just sad that we let it get this far, and go this long. He was sad that he never came back. And Sam, well, he's over the moon. His joy is beyond description. I feel horrible for keeping them apart for so long."

"Don't take the full blame, Nick did leave, so I think we can chalk it all up to being young and afraid and be thankful that we are all adults now that face our problems head on instead of running from them."

Hearing Eddie's truck pull into the driveway, Janet gave Hannah an encouraging smile. "Looks like you'll have some time before we head over to the Commander's place. Eddie just pulled up."

………………………………………….

Sam rode his bike over to the Commander's house; his _grandfather_. The Commander, probably the coolest old guy he knew, was his grandfather. He wondered if it would seem too silly to call him granddad, or maybe gramps. Pop-pop was one of the names he knew could be used. Sam was so deep in thought he rode right past the house. Turning around he rode his bike right up to the front of the place. Jumping off his bike and taking a deep breath, he lugged his bike up the three steps to drag it onto the lawn. Letting it fall, he gave into himself and ran to the front door, anxious to see his new grandfather and grandmother. Before he could knock, the door was flung open and a pair of arms the size of tree trunks grabbed him into a huge bear hug.

"There's my boy!" The Commander grabbed Sam and hugged him for dear life. Just when you thought you couldn't get any more blessings in one lifetime, you got more. Tears flowed from his eyes as he just held this little boy knowing he was a part of him.

"Grandpa! You're squishing me!" But despite Sam's protests, his arms came as far as they could around the Commander and squeezed right back. That's how Leslie found them when she walked in from the kitchen wanting Robert to test the pasta sauce she was making. Quietly she backed away and let the two have their moment.

………………………………………….

After a little searching, Phil found Penny in her dorm room. They never spent any time there since his place was obviously bigger and considerably more private. He stood in the doorway undetected, looking at her from behind. She was sitting cross-legged on her bed staring out the window. She was so beautiful, loving, caring and she was carrying his baby. The news of it all finally took root in his heart and settled right in the center.

They could do this. Of this he was sure. They would have some money problems in the beginning, but once he was done with his degree, and she hers, it would be fine. Clearing his throat to get her attention, she turned around and looked at him.

Tears; streaking down her face like some kind of a waterfall. He was unprepared for it. Phil had been so wrapped up in his fears that he hadn't stopped to think how Penny would feel about him leaving so suddenly.

"What do you want?"

"What do I… Penny, I'm sorry I left earlier, I just…" Phil paused, panic and perspiration started to coat his forehead. "I just… it was big news and I just didn't know how to handle it. I'm sorry sweetheart."

Unfolding herself from her position on the bed, she stood up and strode over to him. "You know what Phil? I really don't feel like talking to you right now. I know we are going to have to figure this out eventually, but at this moment, I don't wanna see your face."

"Penny, look, I'm sorry. If you think I'm mad at you about the…"

"I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK! All you ever think about is yourself. All WE ever think about is you. All we ever focus on is YOU. For almost a year now, we have been dealing with your problems. I'm constantly treading on thin ice trying to deal with your crazy ass. Pause Press… Klauss… friggin' nudity! Ugh!!! The one time… THE ONE TIME I needed YOU?! Well, let's just say it's an understatement that you let me down. Get out, GET THE HELL OUT right now, before I say something I'm not gonna be able to take back."

In shock Phil backed away. He had never heard Penny raise her voice in anger, ever. Her words cut him deeply and he was feeling too defenseless to fight back, much less fight for her. For the second time that day, Phyiscal Phil Farmer walked away from Penny.


End file.
